


John Winchester's Mulligan

by AGJ1990



Series: Evelyn Winchester [45]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Domestic Violence, Everyone deserves another chance, Evy's back again, Gen, Implied/Referenced Domestic Violence, John as a good daddy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-30
Updated: 2018-06-13
Packaged: 2019-04-30 07:07:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 27
Words: 61,570
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14491515
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AGJ1990/pseuds/AGJ1990
Summary: This is the sequel to A Twist of Fate. Evy comes back to her family. It’s another version of New Life, New Family, but centers on John, Bobby, Sam, and Dean instead of just Sam and Dean this time.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: The characters of Supernatural do not belong to me. The original characters of Evelyn Winchester and Missy Collins do. 
> 
> One of my biggest regrets I had with New Life, New Family and Life After Death is that I started Evy off at six years old. I feel like it didn’t give me enough time to write some real fluffy toddler Evy chapters. So I started her off at three years old this time. Enjoy!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Update-Chapter 22 contains references to domestic violence. Because of this, I have updated the rating of this story to T.

John flipped the light switch inside the garage, pulled on his jacket, and began to leave. He stopped when he took a glance up towards the office. He hated that room, and the state of the desk inside showed it. He’d buried himself in his work in the last three years, but it hadn’t helped. For whatever reason, John didn’t walk out to his car and head towards the house he shared with Bobby and Dean. He trudged up the stairs, heart aching just like it did every day, and cautiously opened the door. His jaw hit the floor when he saw a familiar head of long brown hair, carefully braided, bent over the desk with a pen in her hand. At the sound of the door opening, Evy turned and smiled.

“Hi, Daddy!”

            Before John could answer, the moment was over. Evy faded away, and John was only left with the empty office again. It was a hallucination, and a painful one at that. _If she had been in this office, she wouldn’t have been smiling. She would’ve chewed my head off for how messy I’ve let the office get,_ John thought. He regretted his decision to come up to the office, and quickly turned to leave to go back home.

“Hello?”

            John jumped. He was standing halfway down the stairway, looking down onto the garage floor. There had been no one there since John had closed three hours earlier. He had locked all the doors and windows, just as he did every night. There should have been no one there. But, clear as day, there stood in the middle of the floor a little girl, no older than three or four, looking up at him terrified and with tears in her eyes. John didn’t move. He couldn’t. He knew who the little girl looked like, but there was no way it was possible.

            Was it?

“Who are you?” the little girl asked timidly. “Where am I?”

“How’d you get in here?” John asked.

The little girl backed up, biting her lip and keeping her eye on John. She backed up all the way to the wall, where she couldn’t get away any further. John very slowly walked off the staircase and towards her, but the little girl was scared out of her wits. Two big, fat tears crawled down her face, and John stopped, holding his hands up as if in surrender.

“I won’t hurt you.”

“Who are you?” she asked again.

“Who are _you_?” John asked. “Can you tell me your name?”

The girl firmly shook her head. “No. I not ‘posed to talk to strangers.”

 _Of course_ , John thought. “Okay. I’ll tell you my name first.” John said, bending down so he wasn’t as tall and intimidating to her. “My name’s John. John Winchester.”

The little girl’s eyes got bigger. “Dat’s my daddy’s name.”

So she was exactly who John thought she was. “Are you Evelyn?” When she still seemed unsure whether or not to answer, John assured her, “It’s okay. If you are Evelyn, then I’m your daddy.”

“You not my daddy.” The little girl said, for the first time sounding sure of something. “You’s too old to be my daddy.”

Despite the unbelievable situation, John couldn’t help but chuckle.

“What so funny?”

“Nothing, sweetheart.” John said. “Trust me, please. I am your daddy.”

“Show me.”

“What?” John asked, taken aback by the command.

“I don’t know you. If you’s my daddy, show me. Show me so I know.”

 _Yep. She’s Missy’s kid, that’s for sure._ But John was insanely proud of her for making him prove that he was her father rather than just taking his word for it, so he reached inside his pocket slowly. He pulled out his wallet and flipped to a photo he kept buried inside it. He extended it towards Evy, but she didn’t move, still terrified of him.

“I won’t touch you.” John said. “You can come take the picture from me, and I promise I won’t touch you. But please look at it.”

Evy cautiously walked over to John, took the photo and took a long look at it.

“Do you know who it is in that picture?”

“That’s my mommy.” Evy said. “My mommy and me.” “That’s right.” John said with a smile. “I took that photo on your second birthday.”

“Is mommy here too?”

John’s heart twisted like a pretzel at that question. What was he supposed to say to that? He hated lying to her, but he had to get Evy to trust him. He decided to stall her, hoping to get Bobby, Sam, and Dean involved so he could figure out what to do.

“I promise I’ll take you to your mommy soon.” John said. He wasn’t looking forward to taking her to Missy’s grave, but he could think of nothing better to tell her. “But right now we need to get to uncle Bobby’s house.”

“Why uncle Bobby’s house?” Evy asked. “Why not our house?”

“I’m afraid we live with uncle Bobby now.” John said.

“Oh. Okay.” Evy said simply.

“Okay. You ready to go?”

“I’m ready.” Evy said, yawning. “Are you sure you my daddy?”

“Believe me, I’m sure.” John said.

            Evy smiled, thrust her arms out as far as they could go, and flexed her fingers. For a brief second, John was confused, then he realized what she was asking for. He got back up off his knees, a task that was becoming harder with his advancing age, and picked up Evy. She wrapped her arms around his neck as he kept one arm underneath her bottom, holding her up, and one arm around her waist, squeezing her in one of her “daddy bear hugs”. Evy yawned again.

“Why don’t you get some sleep?” John suggested. “We’ll talk more when you wake up.”

Evy shook her head. “I’s not tiwed.”

John chuckled. “Okay, little one. You hang on to Daddy. I’ll keep you safe.” “’Kay, Daddy.” Evy said with yet another yawn. “Woves you Daddy Bear.” “Love you, baby bear.”

            John didn’t know where that had come from. It had been over two decades since he’d last said it. But apparently it was like riding a bike. Still in shock, John got an idea, and walked out to the front, near the cash register. With one hand, he pulled a piece of paper off the large legal pad, opened a permanent marker, and made a sign that read “Closed for Family Emergency. Will reopen in one week. We apologize for any inconvenience. Employees call manager’s cell phone for more information.” Since the garage and parking lot were empty, he didn’t have anyone waiting on their cars, so he taped the sign to the door and walked out to his own car with a still sleeping Evy on his shoulder. Praying they wouldn’t get pulled over on the way to Bobby’s, John set her in the front seat, buckled her in, got behind the driver’s seat. Evy never woke up once.

“What the hell are you doing here, little one?”


	2. Chapter 2

Bobby waited on the couch for John to get home, one leg bouncing up and down. John had called from the car, whispering, and told him to make up the guest room for someone to sleep in. He wouldn’t tell Bobby who the bed was being made for, what was going on, or why he was whispering. He finally heard John’s car pull in, and Bobby walked to the door. He started to shout at John “What the hell is going on, idjit?”, but stopped. John went to the passenger side of the car, bent down, and pulled something out of the car. As John carefully shut the door behind him, Bobby’s jaw dropped. John was holding a kid.  
“What the hell?” Bobby asked in a loud whisper.  
John put a finger to his lips. “She’s asleep. Let me put her in the guest room and I’ll tell you what happened.”   
“Who is that?”   
“Come with me and I’ll show you.” John said simply.   
Bobby followed John to the guest room, watching as John gently laid the kid down on the bed. He couldn’t get a good look at the kid’s face until had laid her down and wrapped her up. When he did, Bobby was sure he was hallucinating. In front of him was a perfect replica of Evy as a baby.   
“What the hell?”   
“I know, Bobby.” John whispered. “It’s really her.”  
“Look, I know you want it to be, I do too, but…”   
“Bobby, I tested her in the car. She’s not a zombie, a ghost, revenant, demon, anything else. She’s a little girl.” John turned back to Evy, who was now sleeping with a thumb in her mouth. “My little girl.”   
“What the hell?” Bobby said again. It wasn’t elegant, but it was the best he could think of for the current situation.  
“Let’s get to the living room and talk.” John suggested. “I don’t want to wake her up.”  
The two men, still in shock, walked towards the living room both wondering what they were going to do now. But no sooner had they made it to the couch than a gust of wind took them both by surprise. A familiar figure materialized in front of them.   
“John Winchester. It’s good to see you again.”   
“Castiel.” John said. “Did you have something to do with this?”   
“Yes.” Castiel said simply. “Where is Evelyn?”   
“She’s sleepin’.” Bobby said. “What the hell’s going on?”   
“Perhaps you’d rather hear it from someone else.”   
Another familiar person appeared next to Castiel, someone much more welcome. John’s breath was taken away. As surprised as he’d been to find Evy, it was nothing compared to seeing Missy again. The last few years of her life, she’d been weak, frail, and sick. No longer. She was strong, had her color back, and appeared to be happy.  
“Hi.” She said simply.   
“Hey, you.” John said. “It’s good to see you.”  
“You too.” Missy said. She turned to Bobby. “How are you, Bobby?”   
“Better now.” Bobby said. Missy had been, as he’d told her once before, ‘the sister he didn’t think he wanted’. “What are you doing here?”   
“I brought you guys a gift.” Missy said simply.   
“But how?” John asked. “How is she back here?”   
“Sensitives have a special gift.” Castiel said. “They cannot last very long in heaven without their families. So they often choose to come back, in a younger body, so that they can help relieve the suffering of the family members who are grieving them.”  
“She left heaven for us?”   
“Yes.” Castiel said.   
“Will she remember that?” Bobby asked.  
“No.” Missy answered.  
“What about her ability?” John asked. “The way she was an incubator for that supervirus. I can’t go through that again…”  
“You do not have to.” Castiel said. “She has fulfilled her purpose. I cannot promise that she will never be hurt again. I cannot even promise that she won’t die again. But her coming back is a reward for what she did for the rest of humanity. She is being given a chance to live her life over. To give you a chance at happiness again. All of you.”   
So Evy had given up her spot in heaven to make him happy again. His child sacrificed her eternal paradise and happiness to soothe his hurt and aching heart. His guilt was immense. He’d done nothing to deserve anywhere close to that kind of selfless devotion. Not from Dean, not from Sam, not from Missy, and most definitely not from Evy. But Evy had always had a heart for everyone else but herself. Apparently that tendency was more extreme than he’d thought.   
“There’s one catch, John.” Missy said suddenly, breaking his thoughts.   
“What’s that?” John asked.  
“No supernatural.” Missy said seriously. “You are to let our daughter live an entirely normal existence. She deserves to be a child. This time even more so than last time.”   
“But Bobby and Dean still hunt.” John protested.   
“And I’m sure Bobby would have no problem coming up with something to tell Evy.” Missy turned to Bobby, who nodded in agreement. “You’re getting another chance here, and, to be honest, it’s not entirely by my choice. She needs love, gentleness, and patience. Not the firm hand you tried to force on her when I raised her. Agreed?”   
“I don’t know if I can do it.” John answered honestly.   
“I’ll be here to help.” Bobby said. “Sam’s always nearby, and me and Dean can cut back on the hunting.”  
“I mean it, John. You agree to show her patience, and let her be a child, or I take her back with me now.” Missy promised. “What’s it gonna be?”   
The thought of losing her again was more than John could take. “I promise. I’ll do my best.”   
Missy smiled. “I believe you.”  
John walked slowly towards Missy, cautiously reaching a hand out to touch her cheek. “I miss you.”   
Missy placed one hand on top of his, and used the other to touch his cheek in return. “I miss you, too. But we’ll be together again one day. All of us. Right now, you’ve got a job to do.”  
“Daddy?”   
John jumped and looked towards the entrance into the living room. Evy stood there, rubbing her eyes of sleep. John looked back to where Missy had just been standing, but she was gone. He felt a pang in his heart, but turned back towards Evy.   
“What’s wrong, little one?”   
“I tan’t seep.” Evy said. “Can I sit wit you?”   
“Of course you can. Come here.”   
Evy was surprised. John usually wasn’t too patient with her, and wasn’t happy when she got out of bed. Evy smiled and eagerly ran to him, then grinned in delight when he picked her up and held her to his chest. John sat back down next to Bobby.   
“Why couldn’t you sleep?” John asked quietly, pushing her hair out of her face.   
“I was dweaming about mommy and I woked up cwying ‘cause I wanted her and she wasn’t dere.” Evy said.  
John’s heart shattered. He dreaded this conversation, but it had to happen. He was taken back to when Dean had been just a bit older than Evy was at the moment, and he’d had to tell him that mommy wasn’t coming back. Fighting back his own tears, John started to explain,   
“I have to tell you something, little one. Mommy…”   
“I know mommy’s in heaven, Daddy.”   
“You…you what?” John asked. “How do you know that?”   
“She came and seed me. She waked me up when I started cwying.”  
John looked to Bobby, who seemed just as confused as John. “What did she say to you?”   
“She sayed she was sorry, but she was in heaven and couldn’t stay down here wif me. Dat I forgotted, but I was up dere wif her too, but I comed back down hewe to be wif you and Sammy and Deanie and unca Baby ‘cause you was all sad. Dat she had to stay wif my sister up in heaven so she won’t wonely and I’d see her agains one day.”   
Bobby and John’s eyes were wet with tears at Evy’s story.   
Evy looked up and noticed her daddy crying. “Daddy? You’s still sad?”   
“I was.” John said. “I was because I missed you so much. But I’m not now.”   
“Then how come you cwying?” Evy asked.  
“I’m crying because I’m so happy you’re back here with me.” John said.   
“So you cwying ‘cause you happy?” Evy asked, brow furrowed in confusion.  
“Mm-hmm.”   
Evy shook her head and looked back down. “Gwown-ups is weiwd.”   
For the second time that night, Evy made John snort.   
“Whewe’s Sammy and Deanie?”   
“They’ll be here when you wake up for breakfast, Baitfish.” Bobby said.  
Evy had been so concerned with John she hadn’t noticed Bobby sitting next to them. “Unca Baby!”   
“Hey, Baitfish.” Bobby said, reaching over and pulling her out of John’s lap. “It’s good to see you.”   
“Unca Baby? Do me and Daddy wive wif you now?”   
“I guess so.” Bobby answered.  
“Does dat mean the bed I was sweeping in is my woom?”   
“Yep.”   
“Cool! Can I paint it?” Evy asked excitedly.  
“We’ll talk about it.” Bobby said. “Why don’t you go back to sleep?”   
“Will’s you make me waffles and pancakes in da morning?” Evy asked.  
“Waffles and pancakes? You must think you’re pretty special, huh?”   
“Yep.” Evy said, grinning.   
Bobby chuckled. “You’re right about that, Baitfish. I guess I can make you waffles and pancakes in the morning.”   
“As long as you eat some eggs too.” John said.   
“Wif cheese?”   
“With cheese.” John said with a smile. “You want me to put you back to bed?”   
“Will’s you hold me ‘till I go back to seep, Daddy? Pease?”   
“Sure.” John said. “Sure. Come here.”  
John pulled Evy back from Bobby’s lap and into his. Bobby kissed Evy goodnight, hoping that he wouldn’t wake up the next morning and find out that everything had just been a weird dream. John laid Evy back down in her bed, pulled up her blanket, and kissed her goodnight.  
“Good night, little one.” John whispered. “Thank you for coming back. I love you.”


	3. Chapter 3

Sam walked into Bobby’s, worried and wondering what was going on. Bobby had called him at six that morning and told him to come to the house and plan to stay all day. Bobby had promised that nothing bad was going on, but he needed to be there. Just as he always did, Sam walked in without knocking on the door. He headed towards the kitchen, where he could hear Bobby cooking. He also heard a sound that made him stop. Giggling?   
“Sam? That you?” Bobby asked.   
“Yeah.”   
“Well, come on. Get in here.” Bobby called.   
Sam walked in and started to say something, only to be left speechless when he saw a familiar little girl sitting on Bobby’s counter.   
“Hi.” The little girl grinned and waved at Sam.   
“Hi.” Sam said, then turned back to Bobby. “Who is that?”   
“It’s exactly who you think it is.”   
“My name’s Evy. What’s you name?” Evy said.   
Sam’s mouth hung open, exactly as Bobby and John’s had done the night before.   
“You okay?” Evy asked. “Unca Baby, I fink his face got ‘tuck.”   
Bobby laughed as he plated the pancakes in front of him. “It didn’t get stuck, Baitfish. He’s just surprised.”   
“Cricket?” Sam whispered. “Is it really you?”   
“Only Sammy calls me dat.” Evy said. “Sammy? Dat you?”   
“Yeah. It’s me, baby.” Sam said.   
“You gots tall. Wike a giwaffe.”   
Sam laughed. “Can this giraffe pick you up and hold you?”   
Evy thrust her arms out towards Sam, and Sam scooped her up and held her tight to him. Bobby had expected Sam to be skeptical, but apparently he wasn’t. John, who’d been in the bathroom, came out and found Sam hugging Evy.   
“You two met, huh?”   
“Dad. How…?” Sam asked.   
“It’s a long story, Sammy. But she’s back. Back to stay.”   
Sam pulled Evy away from him a little to get a closer look at her. She looked exactly as she had at age three. Sam had heard of people slowly forgetting loved ones after they died. That hadn’t happened with Evy. If anything, Sam’s memories had only gotten sharper. He remembered the sound of her voice, the way she’d looked, the way until age five she usually replaced her r’s and some of her l’s with w’s.   
“Do you have any idea how much we missed you?”   
“I know.” Evy said. She looked over towards John. “Daddy, can I tell him?”   
“Tell him what?”   
“How I got hewe.” Evy said.   
John nodded. “Go for it.”   
“Mommy bringed me back. She said I was an angel up there in heaven wif her, and I comed back down ‘cause you and Daddy and Deanie and unca Baby was all sad.”   
“What?” Sam asked, looking over towards John and Bobby. “Is all that true?”   
“I know it sounds crazy, Sam. And if I hadn’t been there, I wouldn’t believe it either.” John told him. “But it’s all true.”   
“Anybody home?”   
Dean picked that moment to come into the kitchen.  
Evy started squirming hard in Sam’s arms. “Deanie!”   
Sam immediately put Evy down on the floor and she ran to Dean and jumped into his arms. A stunned Dean was given the same abbreviated version of the story Sam had been given. Dean accepted it as Sam had, believing that if Evy had passed inspection by both John and Bobby, she had to be the real deal. Once everyone was calmed down, and they were at the table eating, John asked a question that had been bugging him since Evy had first laid eyes on Dean.   
“Little one, can I ask you a question?”   
“Sure, Daddy.” Evy said.   
“Why did you recognize Dean when he walked in? You didn’t know me, Sammy, or uncle Bobby until we told you it was us.”   
Evy took one look at Dean and answered, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world, “’Cause Deanie wook the same.”   
Dean, who was well into his forties, broke into a lottery winning grin at the news that he looked the same to Evy as he had at seventeen. The rest of the room glared, and Dean pulled Evy into his lap. Evy reached out for her plate, which Dean pulled in front of her. She started to grab her fork and eat again, but John noticed that she slumped her shoulders and pouted before she did.   
“What’s wrong, little one?” Evy didn’t say anything at first, and John noticed her bottom lip starting to shake. “Hey, come on, what is it?”   
Evy finally looked up and wiped her eyes of tears. “There’s cheese in here.”   
“You’re crying because there’s cheese in your eggs?” John asked. “You asked for them.”  
“No, the eggs are good. Weally good.” Evy said, wiping her eyes again. “It’s da way mommy makes ‘em.”   
“Oh.” John said. This wasn’t about the eggs, it was about Missy.   
“I’m never gonna see mommy again.” Evy said, starting to cry full force.   
“Oh, little one. Come here.”   
John took Evy from Dean’s lap and held her in his. Evy cried for into his shoulder for a few minutes, while Dean, Bobby, and Sam said nothing. No one had an appetite anymore. John waited patiently as she cried herself out, rocking her a little and gently shushing her. When Evy finally calmed down, John asked,  
“Will you sit up for me a minute?”   
Evy sat up sniffling, and John that tears were still falling. He wiped them away for her and asked, “Do you know how much your mommy loved you?”  
Evy shook her head. “No, sir.”   
“You don’t know? Or you want to hear it again?”   
“I want to hear it again.” Evy admitted sheepishly.   
“That’s fine. Anytime you want to know something about your mommy, you ask me, or Bobby, or Sam, or Dean, and we’ll tell you. Okay?”   
“Otay.” Evy said. “How much she wove me?”   
“She loved you more than anything else in the whole wide world. You were her life. When something or someone hurt you, it hurt her too.” John said. “And while you might not be able to see your mom, you can still talk to her.”   
“I tan?” Evy asked. “How?”   
“Your mommy’s right here,” John said, pointing one finger at her head, “and right here. She’s always looking after you, even though you can’t see her. So if you get sad, and you miss her, just talk to her, and she’ll blow you kisses.”   
“So I just has to ask?”   
“Just ask.” John said. “You want to try it?”   
Evy took a shaky breath and said, “Mommy, I misses you. Can I has a kiss pease?” After a few seconds of complete silence, everyone breathed a sigh of relief when Evy smiled and clapped, “I feeled it, Daddy!”   
“Good.” John said.   
“Daddy? The last thing I remember’s mommy getting hurt. We was widing in da car going to school and somebody hit da car. Mommy wouldn’t waked up, and I hit my head weally hard. Is dat when mommy and me wents to heaven?”   
“No.” John said, though he had a little more context as to exactly how old Evy was.  
Missy had been in a car accident that knocked out both her and Evy out. Evy had been three at the time, and she hadn’t woken up for almost two days. John shuddered at the memory, and he saw Sam and Dean do the same. He had been on a hunt at the time, and had to get the call from a weeping Sam that Missy had been hurt.  
“No, that’s not when you or mommy went to heaven. You and mommy were hurt, but you both made it out of the accident okay. It just took a little while for you to wake up.”   
“Sammy, you was in da car too. Was you hurt?” Evy asked.   
“No, Cricket. Mommy dropped me off at school first because I missed the bus. I was already out of the car.” Sam said.   
“Oh, dat right.” Evy said.   
“Little one, I know it seems scary that mommy won’t be here. But do you want to know the last thing she said to me before she did go to heaven?”   
“What she say?” Evy asked.  
“She said that I needed to love you enough for the both of us. And if you give me a chance, I’ll do that. What do you say?”   
“I wikes it.” Evy said with a smile. She thought of something else. “Daddy? Do you still works away from home a wot?”   
“Well, sort of. I do have a job in town, but I’ll be home pretty much every night.”   
Evy’s eyes widened. “Evewy night?”   
“Almost every night.” John clarified. “There may be nights once in a while that I have to work late, but most nights I should be home by the time you go to bed.”   
“What I do while you working?” Evy asked.  
“We’ll have to figure that out later.” John said. “I took a few days off to spend with you, so I’ll be home all this week.”   
“Will you pwomise to gives me a kiss if you not home ‘fore I go sweep?” Evy asked.  
“That I can definitely do. Feel better?” John asked. Evy nodded, and everyone smiled. “Why don’t you go get dressed?”   
“I’s still hungwy, Daddy!” Evy protested. “And I can’t go get dwessed.”   
“Why not?” John asked, amused.   
“Daddy, I not got no cwothes.”   
“Oh.” John said, and could have slapped himself in the face at missing something so obvious. “Well, I guess we should go shopping today, then.”   
“’Kay, Daddy.”   
“But one thing you will do,” John said, tweaking Evy’s nose and making her laugh, “is get a bath before we leave. You stink!” He pinched the end of his nose in an exaggerated way and sent Evy off into hysterical giggles.   
After Evy calmed down, she looked over at Sam. “Sammy? Will you’s give me baff? And bwush my hair?”   
“You bet I will, Cricket.” Sam said. “Finish your breakfast and we’ll go.”   
“’Kay.” Evy said, turning back around to her plate.   
When Evy was gone, Bobby and Dean stared at John in amazement. “What?” John asked, laughing.   
“Who are you and what have you done with my father?” Dean asked, only half joking.   
“What do you mean?”   
“John, you wouldn’t know how to be that gentle if someone offered you a million bucks.” Bobby remarked. “What changed?”   
John shrugged. “I’m a changed man.”   
“I’ll say.” Dean said.  
John couldn’t help but bristle a bit at the defensive tone in Dean’s voice. “What does that mean?”   
“Dad, it’s not a criticism.” Dean said. “But you really are a changed man. For the better. I just wish…”   
“Wish what, Dean?” John asked, though he had a feeling he knew what Dean was trying to avoid saying.   
“I just wish me and Sammy could have met that guy too.” Dean admitted, then blushed in clear shame. “Dad, I’m sorry, I don’t mean to make you feel bad…”   
“Dean, stop.” John said. Dean stopped talking and looked away. John walked over and grabbed both of Dean’s shoulder. “Look at me, son.” Dean looked up and John said, “Don’t be sorry. My biggest regret is that you and Dean didn’t know that guy. It’s too late to change the past, but if you’re willing to help me with your sister, you can help her know that guy.”   
Dean smiled. “Deal.”   
A few minutes later, a fresh and clean Evy came back to the kitchen. “I weady!”   
John turned and laughed again. “What are you wearing?”   
Evy had on one of his old Marine tshirts, tied in a knot behind her back. She was wearing a pair of Sam’s old shorts, which came almost up to her chest. She wore an old black bandana around her neck that had belonged to Dean, and one of Bobby’s baseball caps, adjusted to fit her small head. She had the socks and shoes on that she’d had the night before.  
“I wanted to wear somefing fwom all of you ‘til I got my own cwothes.” Evy explained.   
“You look great.” John said. “Give us a few minutes to get ready and we’ll go.”   
“’Kay, Daddy.” Evy said. “I go wait in the wiving woom. Sammy, Deanie, you go wif me?”   
“Sure, kiddo. Let’s go.” Dean said.   
“Come here. I still have to brush your hair.”   
“You alweady bwushed it!” Evy said, pushing Sam’s hand away as she walked to the living room with Dean.   
John watched them and whispered, for the second time in just a few hours, “Thank you.”


	4. Chapter 4

After finishing breakfast, cleaning up the kitchen, and an exasperated declaration from Evy of “Sammy, weave me awone or you gonna bwush my hair off!”, the family was on the way to thrift store to get Evy some clothes. John had made up his mind to get her enough clothes to last for two weeks. Evy wasn’t very picky, so the process didn’t take nearly as long as John thought it would. Sam and Dean pulled John aside as Bobby took Evy to the restroom.   
“Dad, we want to get some Evy some toys.”   
“Boys, I like the idea, but….” John said.   
“Dad, no. I mean we” Sam pointed to Dean and himself, “want to get her some toys. You’ve got her clothes, let us get her some toys and books.”   
John sighed and watched as Bobby came back out, holding a happy Evy. He had seen Evy looking towards the toys and books section, but he couldn’t afford to do both at the moment. Dean and Sam both looked as young as Evy, begging for toys themselves. If they want to do it, let them do it, he thought.   
“Don’t overdo it.” John said halfheartedly.  
“Don’t overdo what?” Bobby asked.   
Sam, grinning, pulled Evy from Bobby’s arm. “You ready to pick out some toys and books, Cricket?”   
“Weally? Can I?” Evy asked, looking to John for confirmation.   
“Sam and Dean are doing it for you. Ask them.”  
“Tank you, Sammy! Tank you, Deanie!” Evy said, squeezing Sam’s neck in gratitude.   
“Come on, kiddo.”   
“Boys, we’re gonna go pay for the clothes and load them in the car. You’ve got thirty minutes.” John said.   
“Got it.”   
Half an hour later, they were pulling out of the thrift store parking lot and headed back to Bobby’s. Evy had clothes, a carseat, a few toys, three bags full of children’s books (which drew an “I told you not to overdo it, Sam” from John and a shrug and a “What? They’re educational!” from Sam), coloring books and crayons, and a stuffed unicorn which Evy insisted was named Barney and needed to ride in the car or he’d get lonely. It was a tight fit, but Sam, Dean, and Evy sat in the back, with John driving and Bobby in the passenger seat. When they were back at the house with everything unloaded, Evy started to yawn.  
“I think it’s time for someone to take a nap.”   
“I tink you wight, Daddy. We sees you when’s you wake up. Night night.” Evy said.   
“Not me, silly!” John said.   
“Aww.” Evy said. “But I’s not tiwed.”  
“Why do you hate taking naps so much?” John asked.   
“’Cause you’s gonna have fun wifout me.” Evy said with a slight pout.   
“If we promise we won’t, will you please go take a nap?” John said.  
Evy seemed skeptical, but asked, “You pwomise not to haves no fun wifout me?”   
“Promise.”   
“Not even a wittle?” Evy asked.   
“Not even a little.”   
“Otay.” Evy said. “You comes tut me in?”   
“I’ll tuck you in.” John said, grabbing her hand. “Come on.”   
“Deanie, Sammy, you still be here when’s I wate up?”   
“We’ll be here.” Dean swore.   
“We’ll be here, Cricket. Go get some sleep.” Sam promised.  
“’Kay. Night night. Woves you.”   
Evy walked back to her room, holding John’s hand and Barney in her other arm. The whole situation still seemed bizarre to everyone in the room. John came trudging back in the room, just as exhausted as Evy had been when he’d put her to sleep.   
“You okay, Dad?” Dean asked.   
“Boys, I don’t know if I’ll be able to do this.” John said.   
“What do you mean?”   
“I’m sixty-five!” John answered. “When she’s eighteen, I’ll be eighty.”   
“Dad, you can’t think like that. She needs her family.”   
“You guys are her family too.” John pointed out.  
“What are you saying?” Sam asked. “You want us to raise her?”   
“Not alone. But I am going to need your help.” John said.   
“Dad, are you asking me to quit my job?” Sam asked.   
“No. But there may be days you have to keep her for me. Is that going to be a problem?”   
“Of course not.” Sam said. “Can I move back in here?”   
“Can you? What about your apartment?” John asked.  
Sam shrugged. “It’s a month to month lease. I’d have to finish out the month there, but I could move in here in the next couple weeks.”   
“You’ll have to share a room with Dean again.” Bobby said. “With her claiming the guest room, and me and your dad having our own room, we’re fresh out of bedrooms.”  
“It’s okay with me if it’s okay with Dean.”   
Dean shrugged. “Whatever. We’re not home that much anyway.”   
“I want that to change too.” John said. “I can’t make Bobby do this, but I want you home more often, Dean.”   
“I don’t mind a bit.” Bobby said. “We can cut back to one hunt a month.”   
“Yeah, sure, Dad.” Dean said.   
“Thanks, guys.” John said.   
“Dad, what are you gonna do with Evy while you work?” Sam asked.   
“If Bobby and Dean aren’t home, I guess I can just take her to the garage with me.” John said. “That should be okay at least until she starts school.”   
“What are you gonna tell the guys at the garage?” Dean asked. “They’re gonna wonder where a little kid came from.”   
“Damn, I hadn’t thought of that.” John said.   
“What about this?” Sam suggested. “We had some long lost relative die. They had a kid, and since we were the only family they had left, she ended up with us.”   
“That’s a little farfetched, Sam.” John said, thought he couldn’t think of anything better.   
“But it’s a plausible explanation as to why she calls you daddy and me and Dean her brothers.” Sam said. “If she’s adopted, then we are.”   
“We should probably have some fake papers drawn up if that’s what we’re gonna with.” Bobby said. “And, like you said, John, you’re not exactly a spring chicken. You should probably draw up some guardianship papers. Something that says if you can’t take care of her, she goes to Sam or Dean or me.”   
“You know someone who can do something like that? Draw up convincing papers?”   
“I’ll take care of it.” Bobby said. “Give it a couple weeks, she’ll have a new birth certificate, social security number, everything.”   
“What about her having the same name?” John asked.   
Dean shrugged. “Coincidence?”   
“I guess it’ll have to do.” John said. “It’ll be easier than trying to make her recite a new story.”   
“Have you thought about putting her in preschool?” Sam asked.   
“She hated preschool.” John said.  
“No, she hated going to preschool when you were home.” Sam said. “She loved it otherwise.”   
“I’ll think about it.” John promised, though he’d already made his decision. He had two years before he had to send Evy to school, and he intended to take as much time with her as he could.  
“I just remembered I had to go do something.” Bobby said. “Sam, Dean, you want to help?”   
“Bobby, what are you talking about?” John asked.   
“You don’t worry about it.” Bobby said, snapping slightly. “Sam, Dean, come on.”   
John decided it wasn’t worth it to argue with Bobby, and Sam and Dean left with him. John took his own nap, waking an hour and a half later and going to check on Evy. She was still sleeping soundly, so John went to start dinner and made a note to wake her in half an hour. He heard someone out in the yard, and went outside to investigate.  
“What the…When did you guys do this?” John asked.  
“While you were asleep.” Dean answered. “What do you think?”   
In the backyard was a nearly fully assembled swing set. There were two swings, a slide, and a climbing rope. There was also a tricycle, along with a helmet, knee, and elbow pads. John shook his head.  
“I told Sam not to overdo it. Maybe I should have told you.”   
“Ah, come on. She deserves it.” Bobby said.   
“Yeah, you’re right.” John said. “But at least wait until after she eats dinner to show it to her.”   
“Daddy!”   
“We’ll show her after dinner.” John said again. “I’ll keep her distracted. You guys finish up.”   
Dinner was a long and tedious affair. Evy knew nothing of what was going on, and chatted obliviously, but everyone was ready to watch her go outside and see her new surprise. John told her about their conversation earlier in the day-she would be staying with Bobby and Dean while he worked, and if they were gone, she’d come to the garage with him. Once that was out of the way, John had to bite back a laugh at the look on their faces when he said,  
“Okay, little one. We have a surprise for you outside. But before you can go see it, we need to talk about the house rules.”   
“Otay, Daddy. What wules?” Evy asked.  
“First of all, you need to listen to Bobby, Sam, and Dean just like you do me. That means if they tell you to do something, you do it. Understand?”   
“Yes, Daddy.” Evy said.   
“Second, you do not go outside without telling a grown-up. And if you do go outside, you stay where you can hear us call you. That means if you can’t see the house, we can’t see you.”   
“Got it.” Evy said.   
“And then all the other rules you already know. No tantrums, no yelling, all that. Understand?”   
“I un’erstand, Daddy.” Evy said.  
“Repeat them back to me.” John instructed.  
“Wisten to unca Bobby, Sammy, and Deanie, no goin’ ou’side wifout tewwing a gwown-up, stay wheres I can heaw you, no towing tantrum, no yewwing…” Evy thought about it, but couldn’t remember any other rules. “Did I get ‘em all, Daddy?”   
“Very good, little one!” John said, genuinely impressed. “You have any questions?”   
“What happens if I bwake a wule?” Evy asked nervously. “Does I get a ‘panking?”   
John sighed. He could hardly believe what was about to come out of his mouth, but Missy’s words were ringing in his ears. She needs love, gentleness, and patience. Not the firm hand you tried to force on her when I raised her. He knew the likely reaction Sam, Dean, and even Bobby would have, but like he’d said to Dean, he was a changed man.   
“You only get a spanking for two things. If you lie, and if you do something dangerous. If you go outside and we can’t find you, that’s dangerous. If you wander away from us, that’s dangerous. If you’re honest with us when you do something wrong, you might still be in trouble, but you won’t get a spanking. Understand?”   
Evy smiled and visibly relaxed. “Yes, Daddy.”   
“If you do get in trouble for anything else, you’ll be put in time out or grounded to your room. When you get older, you’ll probably have to write lines. But we’ll talk about it when all that comes up. Deal?”   
“Deal!” Evy said, holding her hand up to her father, who gave her a high five.   
“Any other questions?” John asked.  
“Jus’ one.” Evy said, holding up one finger.  
“What’s that?”   
“Can I has my surprise now, pease?” Evy asked.  
John chuckled. “You bet. Come on.”   
John led her by the hand outside, followed by Sam, Dean, and Bobby. John had been worried that Sam and Dean would be jealous or resentful for what he’d said to Evy’s question about getting a spanking, but both clapped him on the back and nodded. Evy had her eyes closed tight, and her arms around John’s neck. John gently rubbed her back and said,   
“Open your eyes, little one.”   
Evy opened her eyes slowly and her eyes immediately locked on the swing set and tricycle. She squealed in delight. “Is dat all for me?”   
“It’s all yours, Baitfish.” Bobby said.  
“Daddy, put me down, pease, pease, pease.” John immediately obliged, only to have her hug his leg. She let him go and moved to Bobby, Sam, and Dean in turn. “You guys is the best famiwy ever!”   
“Go play, little one.” John said.   
“Somebody push me! Pease?”   
Only when it was pitch black outside did John make Evy come back inside, promising her she could come back the next day. He decided she didn’t need a bath, since she’d gotten one that morning, and changed her into some of her new PJs before reading some of her new books and tucking her into bed. She held Barney firmly in one arm. John sat on her bed and flipped the switch on her lamp.   
“Good night, little one.”   
“Daddy? Can’s I have a gwown-up talk wif you?” Evy asked.  
“Sure. What’s going on?”  
“You pwomise you won’t get mad?” Evy asked. She’d decided earlier in the day that since Daddy was so much nicer now, maybe it would be easier to talk to him about what was bothering her.   
“I promise I won’t get mad.” John said. “What’s wrong?”   
“I not weally wike it when you call me wittle one.” Evy said quietly.   
John was shocked. He had no idea whatsoever that his nickname for her bothered her at all. “Why not?”   
“’Cause it makes me feel wike a baby. I’s a big giwl now.” Evy explained.  
“I’m sorry. I didn’t know it bothered you.” John said sincerely. “Did I ever tell you why I call you that?”   
Evy shook her head no.   
“Well, when you were born, you were so tiny that you fit right here.” John cupped both his hands and extended them out towards Evy.   
“I was that wittle?”   
“You were.” John said with a smile. “You were a few weeks early. The doctor said you were completely healthy, you were just impatient to be born. So he put you right in my hands to hold you. And that’s the first time I knew I loved you. When you were laying in my hands looking up at me.”   
“So, you call me dat ‘cause you wove me?” Evy asked. “Not ‘cause you tinks I’s a baby?”   
“Yes. I call you that because I love you.” John said. “And I know you’re a big girl now. But I’ll try to stop if you really want me too.”   
“No, is okay, Daddy. Tank you for tewwin’ me.”   
“You sure?” John asked.   
“I’s sure. Is okay.” Evy insisted. “Daddy, what I do if I has bad dweam?”   
“Call one of us or come to our room. But if you come to our room, call us to wake us up. Don’t try to shake us awake. Okay?”   
“’Kay, Daddy. Woves you. Night night.”   
“Good night, little one.” John stood up and kissed her forehead. “I love you. Sleep well.”   
“Wait. You gotta say good night to Barney.”   
“Good night, Barney.” John obliged. “You sleep well, too.”   
Evy’s eyes had already closed and she was drifting off into sleep. John kissed her again, and watched her sleep for a few seconds before turning and starting to leave. Evy’s thumb was firmly in her mouth, and she was in a deep sleep already.   
“Daddy loves you, little one.” As John turned and started to leave Evy’s room, he could have sworn he heard a small faint voice say,  
“Wove you more, Daddy.”


	5. Chapter 5

“Owie!”   
Bobby’s concentration was broken as he heard Evy started wailing. He jumped up from the desk and started to run outside, but Evy was already running inside to him. Bobby saw her holding her elbow, and he could see some blood coming through her fingers.   
“Baitfish, what happened?” Bobby asked.  
“I falled.” Evy cried. “Off da wope.”   
“The rope on the swing set?”   
“Yeah.” Evy said. “I’s beedin’, unca Baby!”   
“Let me see. Move your hand.” Bobby gently took her hand away and saw that, while she had scraped her elbow pretty well, and there were some layers of skin missing, the injury looked worse than it actually was. “Come on, Baitfish, we’ll make you feel better.”   
Evy sniffed. “We gets Deanie too?”   
“Deanie’s in the garage working on a car for me. Let me get you cleaned up and I’ll take you out there to him. Okay?”   
“Otay.” Evy said, hiccupping.   
Bobby picked her up and carried her to the kitchen, sitting her on the counter next to the sink. “You want me to tell you what I’m doing as I do it?”   
“Yes, pease.” Evy said.  
“Alright. First thing I’m gonna do is clean the blood away with some water.” Bobby gently patted the blood away from her elbow with a clean washcloth next to the sink. “There you go.”   
Evy examined the elbow and sniffed. “It cwean!”   
“Not quite yet.” Bobby said. “You see, there might be some little germs in there that might make you sick. I gotta clean them too.”   
“How you cwean dem?” Evy asked.  
It’s working, Bobby thought. Telling her the process was distracting her from the pain. “I’ll show you that in a minute.” Bobby pulled out his first aid kit and pulled out a small pair of scissors.   
“Unca Baby, you’s gonna cut me?” Evy asked worriedly.   
“No, I’m not gonna cut you, silly.” Bobby said, tickling her stomach to make her laugh. “I’m gonna cut away a couple pieces of this dead skin so I can get a bandaid on it.”   
“You cut my skin then you cut me!” Evy insisted.   
“You won’t feel it, Baitfish. Promise. Just trust me, okay?” Bobby said.   
“Otay…” Evy said, still skeptical.   
Bobby cut the two biggest pieces of skin away, making a more flat surface on Evy’s elbow. “All done.”   
Evy had looked away, not wanting to see what Bobby was doing. “But I not even feeled it!”   
“Told ya.” Bobby grinned. “You remember what’s next?”   
“Ummm….Cweaning the germs?” Evy asked.   
“That’s right.” Bobby said. “Let’s see…” Bobby dug around in the first aid kit and his heart sank. “Uh oh.”   
“What’s uh oh?” Evy asked worriedly.   
“Well, I’m gonna have to clean the germs with this, Baitfish.” Bobby said. He couldn’t find the Neosporin, so he pulled out an alcohol wipe. “It’s gonna sting.”   
Evy whimpered. “Will is sting for a wong time?”   
“No. Not long.” Bobby said. “Can you be a brave girl for me? Or you want me to go get Dean so he can hold you?”   
“I’s be bwave, unca Baby.” Evy said.   
“Alright.” Bobby said. He opened the alcohol wipe and worked as quickly as he could. Evy whimpered and a few more tears fell, but she stayed as still as she could. “There you go, Baitfish. All over.”   
“It huwts, uncle Baby.” Evy said.   
“I know. We’re almost done.” Bobby said. He took an extra large bandage and stuck it on the wound.   
“Tank you, unca Baby.” Evy said, still sniffing.   
“Not quite done yet.” Bobby said. “I’m gonna wrap your elbow up so it helps keep the bandaid on.”   
“’Kay.” Evy said. She stayed almost completely still while Bobby wrapped her elbow in soft gauze.   
“Feel better?” Bobby asked as he rolled up the gauze. “Does it still sting?”   
“It feel betta.” Evy said. “Tank you, unca Baby.”   
“You’re welcome, Baitfish.” Bobby said. “You want to go see Dean?”   
“Yes, pease. Will you kiss it first?”   
“Sure will.” Bobby said. He took her arm gently and kissed her elbow gently.   
“Tank you. We go see Deanie now?”   
“Come on.” Bobby picked her up and carried her out towards the garage. Dean was underneath the car he was working on for Bobby. “Hey, Dean, need your help here.”   
“Be right out.” Dean pulled himself out and started wiping his hands. “What’s up?”   
“Deanie, I gots a owie. A big one.” Evy said, showing him the gauze on her elbow. “Will’s you kiss for me pease?”   
“Ah, kiddo, sure I will.” Dean kissed her elbow and asked, “What’d you do?”   
“I falled off the wope on the swing set.”   
“Ah. You okay?” Dean asked. “Did you hit your head?”   
“No. I jus’ hit my elbow.”   
“Alright, kiddo.” Dean said. “Bobby, I think the car’s done.”   
“Did you start it up yet?”   
“Not yet.” Dean said. “Kiddo, you want to help?”   
“Can I? How?”   
“I’ll put you on my lap and let you turn the key.” Dean said.   
“Otay!” Evy said, reaching over for Dean.   
Dean sat Evy in his lap, started the car successfully, and decided to take the rest of the day off. It was approaching lunchtime, and after she’d eaten, Evy took a nap. She woke up to the feeling of someone with their fingers in her hair. She opened her eyes and smiled.  
“Hi, Daddy!”   
“Hey, little one.” John said.   
Evy noticed he sounded tired and upset. “Daddy? You’s otay?”   
John sighed. “Daddy’s just had a bad day, little one.”   
“I sowwy, Daddy.” Evy said, sitting up and pulling her blanket away and showing John her hurt elbow. “I did too.”   
“What did you do?” John asked. Bobby hadn’t mentioned that Evy was hurt. “Are you okay?”   
“I’s okay. I got a owie fawwing off the wope on the swing set. Unca Baby fix it.” Evy said. “It stinged some but I was bwave.”   
“Aww, I’m sorry, little one.” John said. “You want a kiss?”   
Evy shook her head. “No. I wants daddy bear hug.”   
“I can do that. Come here.” John took her and hugged her as tight as he could. “How’s that? Feel better?”   
“Dat better. You feels better?”   
“Yeah. I feel better.” John said.   
“Can I gets up now?” Evy asked.  
“Sure, come on.”   
John really did feel better. It had been a terrible day at the garage. He’d discovered one of his employees taking money out of the cash register, and after a confrontation, found out that it had happened several times during the last few weeks. John had spent the morning firing the employee and dealing with the police. After calling in his manager, the only person he trusted to close the garage other than him, John had headed home. He felt guilty sticking Morris, his manager, there after the events of that morning, but Morris had reassured him,  
“Go spend time with that new little girl of yours. It’ll make you feel better.”   
The day passed fairly normally after Evy’s nap. Evy drew John a picture. Sam came home right before dinner, ate with them, then gave Evy a bath and dressed her for bed. After a little begging, John allowed her to watch a short video with Sam. When the credits were over, John delivered the bad news.   
“Time for bed, little one.”   
“I don’t wanna go to bed, Daddy!” Evy whined.   
“Too bad.” John said. “Come on, time to go to sleep.”   
“Pease let me ‘tay up.”   
“Evelyn, I said no.” John said firmly. “You’ve got one more chance. Come with me and go to bed, or you’re going to time out then going to bed anyway.”   
Evy’s face fell. “I’s coming, Daddy.”   
“Good girl.” John said. “Say goodnight to Sam, Dean, and Bobby and come on.”   
Evy reluctantly kissed the rest of her family goodnight. She went down easily enough, and John thought his troubles with getting her to sleep were over. He was wrong. Sam and Dean headed to their room, and he started to tell Bobby about what had happened at the garage, when he heard a familiar voice.   
“Daddy?”   
Biting his tongue to stay patient, John said, “I told you to go to bed.”   
“I can’t seep.” Evy said.   
“Can’t? Or won’t?”   
“Don’t want to.” Evy pouted.   
“You have to go to bed. I’ll put you to bed again, but if you get out one more time, you’re going to time out for five minutes. Understand?” John asked.  
“Yes, Daddy.” Evy said.   
John stood up and escorted Evy back to bed. He tucked her in, kissed her cheek, wished her goodnight, and reminded her not to get up again. But Evy had a cunning plan. If she couldn’t go to the living room and stay with Daddy, she’d go down the hall and stay with Sammy and Deanie. So, after Daddy left and she could hear him talking to Bobby again, she slipped out of her room and tiptoed quietly to Sam and Dean’s room. The door was open slightly, so she didn’t have to knock. She stood at the door and whispered,  
“Sammy? Deanie? Can I comes in?”   
Sam was the one to answer her. “Aren’t you supposed to be asleep?”   
“I don’t wanna go to seep!” Evy protested again.  
“Evelyn!”   
“Uh oh.” Evy realized she had spoken too loud; Daddy had heard her. She turned around and tried to smile her way out of trouble. “Hi, Daddy.”   
“Don’t ‘hi, daddy’ me.” John said. “What did I tell you would happen if you got out of bed again?”   
“I sowwy, Daddy.” Evy said.  
“Come on.” John picked her up and carried her to the bottom step of the staircase. He sat her down and told her, “Five minutes. Do not move from this spot until I come to get you, or your time starts over. Do you understand?”   
“Yes, sir.” A thoroughly miserable Evy replied.   
John wanted to pick her up and hold her, but instead stood up and went to the kitchen. He poured himself a drink and set the timer on the microwave. John could hear Evy sniffing, and he felt his heart splinter. She was crying, but he stayed where he was. Bobby came in the kitchen to support him, but said nothing, not wanting to tempt Evy with the sound of his voice. Damn thin walls, Bobby thought. You could hear a pin drop from the other side of the house. Finally, the timer on the microwave was down to five seconds. John cleared the timer and walked back out. Evy was still on the bottom step, leaning against the railing, a few small tears dripping down her face. John sat down beside her on the step, but did not allow her to crawl into his lap yet.   
“Do you know why I put you in time out?”   
“Yes, sir.” Evy said.  
“Why?” John asked.   
“’Cause I didn’t wisten and ‘cause I got out of bed when you towed me not to.”   
“That’s right. You have to listen to me when I tell you to do something. I tell you to go to bed because if you don’t get enough sleep, you won’t feel good the next day. Understand?” John asked.   
“Yes, sir.” Evy said quietly. “Can I get up now?”   
“You can get up and go right back to bed.”   
“Will you sit wif me ‘till I go to seep?” Evy asked.  
“Is that all you wanted?” John asked. When Evy nodded, John asked, “Why didn’t you just ask?”   
“You said you had a bad day. I didn’t know if you’d want to.”   
“Next time, just ask. Okay? I’ll never be mad at you for wanting me to hold you.” John assured her. “Promise?”   
“Promise.” Evy said.   
“Come on. Let’s go to bed.”   
John carried a sleepy Evy back to bed, happy to see she was already asleep by the time he laid her down. Evy had been with him for close to a month now. And it had mostly been smooth sailing so far. But John had dreaded the first time he would have to punish Evy for anything. She tended to be stubborn, and his patience was pretty low. He’d thought Missy to be too soft on Evy, but he realized now that timeout was perfect for Evy. She hated being alone, and it gave her a few minutes to think about what it was she’d done. Most of the time, she’d figure it out and feel very sorry for disappointing one or both of her parents.   
Something else occurred to John. When he’d spanked or yelled at Dean, Sam, or Evy, he’d often felt guilty about the look of fear in their eyes later. When he thought about some of the things he’d done to Evy the first time around, he still felt ashamed. Telling her about the supernatural because he didn’t think she should go to a sleepover. Spanking her and forcibly cutting her hair, her pride and joy at the time, because he thought she dyed it without permission. Shipping her off to Bobby’s because of a perceived bad attitude after he basically abandoned her and Missy for more than two years. The last one had nearly destroyed his relationship with her forever. But tonight, with the exception of the few tears Evy had shed at the bottom of the stairs, everything went smoothly, Evy wasn’t afraid, John didn’t feel guilty, and everything was back to normal.   
“Good night, little one. Daddy loves you.” John whispered, kissed her, and left the room. Suddenly he was tired too.


	6. Chapter 6

Evy loved staying with Deanie. Daddy was fun, but he wasn’t home much during the day, so she only got to see him for a little while before she had to go to sleep. Uncle Baby was fun too, but he got tired after playing with her for just a few minutes. Sammy would play with her, but he wouldn’t let her have too many snacks or anything like that. He said it wasn’t good for her, so he only let her have a little. Deanie was perfect. He’d play with her, come up with fun games, and as long as she didn’t tell on him, she could have snacks and play and have fun doing pretty much whatever she wanted, as long as he could see and hear her. It had been Dean to help her get over her fear of falling off the swing set again. Evy climbed down off the rope and ran over to Dean, who was working on a car.   
“Deanie? Can I go gets a juice box?”   
“Sure, kiddo. Will you bring me a water bottle?” Dean asked.   
“Otay! Be wight back!”   
Evy ran back to the kitchen. She very carefully pulled open the heavy refrigerator door, reached into the drawer and pulled out one of her juice boxes, then got Dean a water bottle. She closed the drawer and closed the refrigerator door, then went back outside to give Dean the water bottle. Dean opened her juice box for her and handed it back.  
“Thanks, kiddo.”   
“You’s wecome.” Evy said. “Deanie, can I ask you somefing?”  
“Sure, kiddo. Grab that crate and sit down. What’s up?” Dean asked.   
Evy pulled the small milk crate over and sat on top of it. “How come all da superhewoes is boys?”   
Dean tried not to laugh at her very serious question. “What?”   
“All the superhewoes is boys. Spidewman, Batman, Supewman. How come dere’s no giwl superhewoes?”   
“There’s girl superheroes.” Dean said.  
“Weally? Wike who?”   
“Wonder woman, Batgirl, Supergirl. What about your favorite? The powerpuff girls?” Dean said.  
“Oh, yeah. I forgots about dat.”   
“Let me tell you something, kiddo. Girls are just as cool as boys. They can do anything a boy can do, and usually they can do it better.” Dean said.   
“You mean it?” Evy said. “I can do anything a boy can do?”   
“I do mean it.” Dean said. “Hey, I’ve got an idea. I have to get back to working on this car. Why don’t you come up with your own girl superhero. You can tell me about it after I’m done with the car.”   
“Otay!” Evy said. “Can I has a cape?”   
“Sure. Umm…” Dean looked around and found an old blanket Bobby kept in the garage. “Come here.”   
Evy walked over and Dean tied the blanket around her neck.   
“There you go.” Dean said.   
“Tanks, Deanie.” Evy said.  
“Alright, kiddo. I got to get back to work.”   
“’Kay.” Evy said, wrapping an arm around Dean’s leg.   
“I’m almost done out here. When I’m finished, I’ll make some lunch. What do you want to eat?” Dean asked.  
“Can we makes burgers and a pie?” Evy asked.  
Dean grinned and patted the top of Evy’s head. “That’s my girl. That sounds like a plan. Go on, go back and play.”   
“’Kay.” Evy said, turning and running back to her swing set.   
Evy ran back to the swing set, going as fast as she could to make her cape fly. She started to think about her superhero name and what she’d be able to do, when she heard a loud crash and Dean yell. Evy turned around and saw that the car Dean had been working on was now on top of him, and he was laying on the floor of the garage and not moving.   
“Deanie!” Evy yelled, running to him and bending down to check on him. “Deanie, you otay? Come on, wake up.” When Evy shook him and he didn’t wake up, Evy got really, really scared and started to cry. “Deanie, come on. Wate up, pease.”   
Dean didn’t move, and at first, Evy didn’t know what to do. There were no other grown ups around for her to get help from. Daddy was working, Sammy was working, and uncle Baby was on a trip until the next day. Then Evy remembered something. A few days earlier, Dean had taken her to the fire station to check out the fire trucks. After the firemen had shown her the trucks, they’d had a talk about what to do if there was a fire. If there wasn’t another grownup around, she needed to get to a phone and call 911.   
But Evy didn’t know where Dean’s phone was, and she didn’t want to go inside and get the phone off the wall. Evy dug through Dean’s front pocket and found the phone. She pressed the phone button and the keypad popped up. She pressed 911 and waited while it rang a couple times. Her hands were shaking, but she held the phone tight to her ear.   
“I wight hewe, Deanie. Don’t be scawed.” Evy said, even though she was scared.  
“Sioux Falls city 911. What is your emergency?”   
“I needs hep, pease.” Evy said, trying to stop herself from crying. “My bwother’s been hurt.”   
“Your brother’s been hurt?” The lady on the other end of the phone asked. “Can you tell me what happened?”   
“He was working on a caw and it falled on him. He not wating up.” Evy said, and as hard as she tried not to, the tears started to come.   
“Okay, sweetie. I need to ask you some questions so we can come and help your brother. Can you answer them for me?”   
“I try.” Evy said.   
“Okay. Are there any other grown-ups around I can talk to?”   
“No. My daddy and other bwother’s working and my uncle’s gone on a twip.” Evy said.   
“What’s your brother’s name, sweetheart?”   
“Deanie.” Evy answered.  
“Okay. Is Deanie awake? Is he making any sound?”   
“No.” Evy said. “I twied to shake him, but he not watin’ up.”   
“Don’t shake him, sweetie. Is he breathing?”   
“I tan’t tell.” Evy said.   
“Okay, I’m gonna tell you how you can tell. I need you to do exactly what I tell you, okay?”   
“Otay.” Evy said.   
“Alright. Take two of your fingers and stick them under Deanie’s nose. Can you feel any air on your fingers?”   
“A wittle.” Evy said. “Is dat good?”   
“That’s very good, sweetheart. Now, this question is very important. Do you know where you are?”   
“My house.” Evy said.   
“I know, sweetie, but do you know the address?”   
“Umm….” Evy closed her eyes and thought hard. Deanie had taught her their address, and she recited it to the lady on the phone. “Awe you sending hewp now?”   
“Yes, sweetheart. I want you to stay on the phone with me until they get there, alright?”   
“Otay.” Evy said. “I scawed.”  
“I know, sweetie.” The dispatcher couldn’t get over how young this kid sounded. “Can you tell me your name?”   
“Evy.”   
“Evy, my name’s Ronnie. Can you tell me how old you are?” Ronnie asked.  
“Fwee.”   
“Three? You’re very smart for just three years old. And very brave too.” Ronnie said seriously.   
“Is Deanie gonna be otay?” Evy asked.   
“We are going to do everything we can to make sure of that, okay?” Ronnie assured her. She talked to Evy for a couple of minutes, getting broken responses from the terrified toddler. “Evy, can you hear the sirens yet?”   
“I hear’s dem!” Evy said.   
“Okay, honey, stay on the phone with me. When they get to you, hand the phone to one of the paramedics.” A few seconds later, a paramedic came on the phone and confirmed they were there, ending the phone discussion.  
Evy hung up Dean’s phone and tried to talk to Dean again, when she felt herself being picked up and pulled away from him. “No! No! Wet me go!”   
“Sweetheart, listen to me.” The young male paramedic said. “Listen, okay? We’re going to help your brother, but we need some room to work.”   
“He’s huwt.” Evy said, and she couldn’t hold the scared tears back anymore.  
“I know. We are going to work on him. We’re gonna take him to the hospital and the doctors are going to work on him. But we have to have room to work. You can stand right here,” he pointed to the crate Evy had been sitting on earlier, “but we have to have some room. Okay?”   
“Otay.”   
Evy stood against the crate as the two of them worked. They somehow got Dean out and onto a stretcher. Evy stuck her thumb in her mouth, the only thing she could think of to help her feel better. When one of the paramedics started to push a still unconscious Dean towards the ambulance, Evy started to go too. She was held back by the paramedic that had talked to her earlier.   
“Sweetie, we can’t let you go with us.”   
“I’m not weaving him!” Evy said.  
“You can’t ride with us, I’m sorry.” He said. “Do you know where your daddy or…”   
“Jack, just put her in the back!” The female paramedic that was working with him said. “We have to get this guy to the hospital and I can’t watch him and drive at the same time.”   
“Okay.” Jack said. “Come on, sweetie.”   
Evy followed him to the back of the ambulance, where he helped her get inside. Jack shut the doors, ran to the front of the ambulance, and started to pull out. Evy stayed at the back and looked at Dean on the stretcher, then at the female paramedic, who smiled at her.  
“I’m Amanda, sweetie. If you want to get right here and hold your brother’s hand, you can.”   
“Otay.” Evy moved slowly towards Dean’s other side and grabbed his hand. “I’s hewe, Deanie. Don’ be scawed.”   
“You’re a good sister, sweetie.” Amanda said, trying to comfort the distraught kid.   
“Will he be otay?” Evy asked. “Will he wate up soon?”   
“I don’t know.” Amanda said honestly, and dreaded it when she saw Evy start crying again. She got an idea. “Listen, sweetie, there’s something else you can do to help us.”  
“What is it?” Evy asked.   
“Well, when we get to the hospital,” Amanda said, keeping her eye on Dean’s vitals as she talked, “the doctors and nurses are going to take him to a room to be looked at.”   
“I don’t want to weave him!”   
“I know it’s scary, sweetie, but just like Jack and me needed room, so do the doctors. But this is what I want you to do. A nurse is going to take you, probably to a desk, and try to figure out how to get in touch with a grown-up from your family. Can you help?”   
“I’ll hep.” Evy promised. “I don’t know how to call dem wifout Deanie, though.”   
“That’s okay. The nurse’ll help you figure it out.”   
They pulled up to the hospital, and as soon as they were inside, Dean was wheeled to an examination room. Amanda stayed with Evy for a few minutes, asking her questions to help the nurse try to figure out how to get in touch with her family. Evy was overwhelmed with all the questions, but answered them as best she could. What was her daddy’s name? John Winchester. What did he do? Work on cars. Do you know where? No. What is your other brother’s name? Sammy Winchester. What does he do? He’s a lawyer. Do you know where? No. Do you know where your uncle Baby went? No. Evy felt bad she couldn’t answer all the questions, but Amanda assured her she was doing great, and that they’d figure out where her daddy and brother were soon. Evy suddenly remembered that Sammy worked across the street from an ice cream shop, and the nurse working with them, nurse Jackie, relayed that information to the police. Amanda had to leave on a call, and the nurse heard a loud rumble. She realized Evy was rubbing her stomach.   
“Sweetheart, are you hungry? Have you had any lunch?”  
“No.” Evy said. “Deanie was gonna make me wunch but he gotted huwt.”   
“I’m gonna have someone get you something from the cafeteria. What do you like to eat?”   
“You gots pizza?” Evy asked hopefully. “Dat’s what Deanie and me was gonna have.”   
“I think there’s some in the nurse’s lounge. It’s cheese and pepperoni. Do you like that?” Nurse Jackie asked.  
“Yes, ma’am. Fank you.”   
“You’re welcome, sweetie.” Nurse Jackie said. She sent an orderly to the nurse’s lounge to get a piece of pizza and turned back to Evy. “They’re working on your brother. The doctors here are the best there is.”   
“It was scawy.” Evy said. “Deanie yelled and den da car fell and he not wate up.”   
“I know, honey. That had to be scary. But you’re safe, and Dean’s safe, and your brother will be here soon.”   
“Daddy too?” Evy asked.  
“When your brother gets here, we’ll ask him how to call your daddy. He will know, won’t he?”   
“Yes, ma’am.” Evy said.   
The orderly came back with the pizza, and nurse Jackie handed it to Evy. “Here you go.”   
Evy ate, but she was scared and worried, so she only had about half a piece. Finally, half an hour after getting to the hospital, Evy spotted Sam at the entrance to the ER, running inside and looking around.  
“Sammy!” Evy jumped down from the chair nurse Jackie had given her to sit in, and ran to him as fast as she could.   
“Oh, Cricket.” Sam scooped Evy up and held her, and she wrapped her arms around his neck. “Are you okay?”   
“I’s otay.” Evy said sadly.   
“Cricket, what happened?” Sam asked, sitting with Evy in a chair over by the wall. “How did Dean get hurt?”   
“I din’t see it.” Evy said. “I was pwaying, and I heard a cwash, and I wooked over and da car Deanie was workin’ on had falled on him.”   
“Okay.” Sam said, wiping Evy’s tear streaked face and pushing her hair back from her face. “Okay, everything’s okay, Cricket.”   
“Deanie wouldn’t wate up.” Evy said.   
“What?” The cop that had come to notify Sam at work hadn’t mentioned that. “How did you two get to the hospital?”   
“I talled 911.”   
A stunned Sam asked, “You did?”   
Evy nodded. “I gotted Deanie’s phone out of his pocket and called. Dey come and picked Deanie up and bwinged us hewe.”   
“Oh, Cricket…”   
Evy, who’d been scared all afternoon but had only been around strangers so far, finally felt safe enough to let it all out. She burst into tears and Sam held her again. She cried so hard she fell asleep against Sam’s chest, wondering how Dean was doing and why it was taking so long for the doctor to come back out. When she woke up, it was dark, and she wasn’t in Sam’s lap anymore. She was in someone’s though, so she looked up and found her father looking down at her.   
“Daddy!”  
“Hey, little one.” John said, smiling at her and pulling her in for a hug. “Are you okay?”   
“Daddy, whewe’s Deanie?” Evy asked immediately.  
“Deanie’s okay. Look.” John pointed behind them.  
Dean, who was sitting up on a hospital bed, smiled and waved at Evy. “Hey, kiddo.”   
“Deanie! You’s awake!”   
“I sure am. Come here, you.” Dean said.  
John placed an overjoyed Evy on the bed, and Evy grabbed Dean into a hug. “Deanie, you scawed me. You wouldn’t wate up…”  
“I know, kiddo. I’m sorry I scared you.” Dean said.  
“Little one, we all need to talk to you.” John said. “You can stay up there with Dean, but turn around for me, please.”   
Evy turned around and looked out at her family. Sammy was in a chair on the other side of the bed, and Bobby stood by the door. She waited, but no one said anything at first, which made her nervous.  
“Am I in twouble?”   
“No, little one. Quite the opposite. All of us here are very proud of you.” John said.   
“For what?” Evy asked.   
“Cricket, if you hadn’t called for help, Dean would’ve been laying on that floor until Daddy got home. And then he might never have woken up. You saved his life.”   
“I did?” Evy asked. “I just did what Deanie and the fiweman showed me.”   
“And if you had let yourself be too scared, he would have been hurt even worse.” Bobby said. “You were very, very brave today, kiddo.” Dean said.   
“I couldn’t ‘top you fwom gettin’ hurt, though.”   
“Hey. Look at me.” Dean said. “You remember that talk we had about superheroes earlier?” Evy nodded. “Well, you’re my superhero.”  
“I’s a hewo?”   
“Yep.” Dean said. “You sure are.”   
“Definitely.” Sam agreed.  
Evy hugged Dean again. “I’s gwad you okay, Deanie.”   
“Little one, Dean has to stay in the hospital tonight. It’s almost your bedtime. We’ve got to start heading home.”   
“No! Daddy, pease don’t make me weave him!” Evy said, squeezing Dean tighter.  
“Hey, hey. It’s okay. I can leave in the morning, and I’ll be back home tomorrow night.” Dean said, trying to comfort her.  
“But how I know you gonna wate up?” Evy asked. “You wouldn’t at home.”   
“I swear I’ll wake up in the morning.” Dean said.   
“And you can come with me to bring him home, Baitfish. You’ll see him tomorrow.”   
“You pwomise me you’ll wate up?” Evy said. “Swear?”   
“Swear.” Dean promised.   
“Otay. Night night, Deanie.”   
Dean kissed and hugged the exhausted Evy, who was asleep as soon as John’s car started moving back towards home. The next night, an hour after Dean went to sleep and two hours after Evy was supposed to be asleep, Dean heard his bedroom door open and a familiar voice call for him.   
“Deanie. Deanie, wate up, pease.”   
Dean groggily pushed himself up. “What’s wrong, kiddo? You have a bad dream?”   
“No. Jus’ checking on you.”   
Dean frowned. “You want to sleep with me?”   
“Yes.” Evy answered before Dean even got the question out.  
“Come on.” Dean pulled the blanket out of his bed and Evy crawled in. “Goodnight, kiddo. Love you.”   
“Wove you too.” Evy said with a yawn.   
“Go to sleep.” Dean said, kissing her cheek. Evy finally drifted off to sleep, sticking her thumb in her mouth and snuggling against Dean. Dean watched her for a minute before kissing her and whispering, “Thank you, my little superhero.”


	7. Chapter 7

“Unca Baby, I sowwy.”   
Bobby looked up from his work on the desk, taken aback by the unsolicited apology. “Sorry? Sorry for what?”   
“Well, I was paying with the ball that Daddy gotted for me. I was frowing it and twying to wun and catch it. I frowed it too hard and I cwacked a window on you twuck.” Evy said, not looking at Bobby, fearing his reaction.   
“You what?”   
Bobby got up and went outside to check out the damage. Evy followed, hanging her head and paying close attention to her feet. Bobby could have laughed. The ‘crack’ Evy had told him about was a barely visible crack on the corner of his driver’s side window. He made a very concentrated effort to keep his face straight and serious. He bent down in front of Evy and asked,  
“Were you aiming for my truck?”   
“No, sir. I was aiming for the ‘teps on the powch and I fwoed too high. I sowwy.” Evy said. “Is you mad at me?”  
“Not even a little.” Bobby said with a smile.   
“You’s not mad? Even dough I boked you twuck?”   
“I can fix it. And even if I couldn’t, you told me the truth. Good girl.” Bobby said, kissing her cheek. “You ready for lunch?”   
“Can we has mac and cheese?”   
“I don’t see why not.” Bobby said. “Come on, you can help me make it.” Bobby took her inside, and as he waited on the pasta to finish cooking on the stovetop, he asked, “So what do you want for your birthday?”  
“Nuffin.” Evy said.   
“You don’t want anything?” Bobby asked, surprised. Evy’s birthday was in less than a week and he had been tasked by John to find out what she wanted. “Not a party? A present? Nothing?”   
“Nuffin.” Evy insisted.   
If Bobby hadn’t known better, he would have sworn Evy was trying to mimic her father’s ‘this discussion is over, the answer is no’ tone. The problem was, as far as Bobby knew, she hadn’t heard that tone, at least not since she’d literally dropped from heaven and ended up in John’s garage. Evy did seem to have an exceptional memory, remembering things about her mom that seemed unusual for a three-year-old to remember after so long.   
“Baitfish, you okay? Is something bothering you?”   
“I not wanna talk about it.” Evy said.   
Yeah, that’s not suspicious at all. “Baitfish, what’s going on? It ain’t like you to not talk.”   
“Unca Baby, pease. I just not wanna talk about it.”   
“Okay.” Bobby said, deciding not to push it, at least until John got home. “You want a hot dog too?”   
“Yes, pease.”   
“What you want on it?” Bobby asked.   
“Kesup and mussard.”   
Bobby tried to get back to work, but Evy’s mood had taken a downward turn. She didn’t go back outside to play, instead choosing to get a few of her books out of her room and look at them on the couch. Bobby wanted badly to ask her again if she was okay, but the one time he tried she surprised him even more.   
“I going take nap, unca Baby. Night night.”   
Of all the mysteries Bobby had solved in his life, this one took the cake. Evy didn’t want a birthday, wouldn’t talk about why when every other day she was an open book, and, what really concerned him, she willingly took a nap when she’d rather eat paper than sleep. Bobby went to check on her a half hour later, and found her hugging her stuffed unicorn Barney tightly to her chest, sucking her thumb. But what worried him most was the tear tracks going drying on her cheeks. She’d fallen asleep crying.  
“What’s the matter, Baitfish?”   
Bobby decided to let her keep sleeping, and present the problem to Sam, Dean, and John later that night. It amazed Bobby how one little girl could stump four grown men, but she was a master at it. She had been in a good mood that morning, playing like normal, but had turned after Bobby asked about her birthday. Could that be it? John came home a couple of hours early, so Bobby told him about the conversation earlier in the day.  
“She doesn’t want anything?” John asked. “Not even a cake?”   
“No. I don’t know what to make of it. As soon as I asked her, she clammed up and stopped talking.”   
“Hmmm.” John said. “Do you think we should do something anyway?”   
“I think we should find out what’s bothering her first.” Bobby said.   
“How?” John said. “She’s not exactly easy to crack when she clams up like that.”   
“Get Sam to talk to her when he gets home. He’s always been good at figuring stuff like this out.”   
“Good idea.”   
Evy woke up a few minutes later, but was as tight lipped with John as she’d been with Bobby. She wouldn’t talk to Sam or Dean either. As he put her to bed that night, John couldn’t help it. He had to know what was clearly bothering her.   
“Little one, I know something’s bothering you. Will you please tell me about it?”   
Evy bit her bottom lip. “I not want to hurt you feelings, Daddy.”   
“Why would it hurt my feelings?” John asked. “Is it about your birthday?”  
Evy nodded. “I only want one fing for my birfday but I can’t have it.”   
“How do you know?” John asked. “Come on, tell me what it is.”   
“You can’t do it, Daddy. No one can.” Evy said, looking down and picking at the hair on Barney’s mane.   
John would regret his insistence. “Come on, tell me.”   
“I wanted mommy to come.” Evy said quietly.   
John sighed sadly and noticed that Evy’s bottom lip was shaking. “Oh, little one…”   
“I wish I could give all my toys and stuff back if it…” Evy started to say, but couldn’t finish because she had to wipe her eyes. “I just wants my mommy to be there. I don’t want to make her sad.”   
“Why do you think your mommy would be sad if you had a birthday party?” John asked.   
“Because she said it made her happy to be there for my birfdays. If she can’t be there, she be sad.” Evy reasoned.   
“Oh, little one, I promise your mommy wouldn’t be sad if you had a good time for your birthday. It made her happy for you to be happy. It made her sad when you were hurting, or sick, or scared and she couldn’t make you feel better. Does that make sense?”   
“So she wouldn’t be sad if she can’t be there?” Evy asked.  
“No. I promise she wouldn’t be sad.” John said. “But, if you want, while we have your party, we can send your mom a present too.”   
“Weally? How?”   
“Do you remember what your mom used to say about balloons?” John asked.  
“Yeah. They makes you happy no matter how sad you is.”   
“That’s right. So this is what we’ll do. I’ll get a dozen balloons Saturday and we’ll blow them up. We’ll tie them with string and during the party, we’ll go out in the backyard and let them float up to your mommy.” John suggested. “What do you think?”   
“Will she get ‘em?”  
“Where do you think balloons go when they get released and you can’t see them anymore?” John asked.  
Evy’s eyes bulged. “They goes to heaven?”   
“That’s right.” John said with a smile, rather proud of his improvisational skills.  
“Can we send her balloons on mommy’s birfday too?”   
“Sure. Her birthday’s still a way’s off, but sure.” John promised. “You want a party now?”   
“You bet I do!” Evy said, the prospect exciting instead of dreadful now.   
John laughed. “Okay. You can talk to uncle Bobby about it tomorrow. Right now, you get some sleep.”   
“Daddy? You fink unca Baby would let me pant some fowers?”   
“I think uncle Bobby would give you the moon if you asked for it.” John said. “Why do you want to plant flowers?”   
“For mommy.” Evy said. “I want to pant those pink fowers she wiked so much.”   
“Roses?” John asked. “That’s a big job. Are you sure?”   
“I’s need hep gettin’ started and stuff, but I can keep them watered and keep them lookin’ good.”   
“Okay. I’ll talk to uncle Bobby about it. I can’t promise, ‘cause I don’t know how well roses grow here. But we’ll see.” John said.   
“Tank you, Daddy.” Evy said with a yawn. “I’s go seep now.”   
“Okay. You feel better?” John asked.   
“I feels better.”   
“You sure? It’s not like you to want to go to sleep.” John said.   
“The fasser I go seep, the fasser I can hep wif my pawty.” Evy explained.   
“Alright. Lay down.” John said. Evy did, John read her a story, and a few minutes later, she was sleeping peacefully. “Good night, little one.” John walked out to the living room, where everyone was still waiting to hear what was wrong with Evy. “Bobby, you can talk to her about the party tomorrow.”   
“Did you find out what was wrong with her?” Dean asked.   
“Yeah. She thought Missy would be unhappy if she couldn’t go to the party, so she wanted to skip it so she wouldn’t upset her mom.” John explained.   
“Why wouldn’t she tell me that?” Bobby asked.   
“She said she didn’t want to hurt my feelings because I couldn’t bring Missy to the party.” John said.   
“How’d you convince her to have the party?” Sam asked.  
“I told her we’d get some balloons and release them.” John said.   
“What’s that gonna do?” Dean asked, at the same time Sam said, “Dad, that’s awesome!”   
“Don’t you know, Dean? Balloons go to heaven when you can’t see them anymore.” John answered.  
The next three days brought about an all new Evy. She was so excited about turning four, what she called a ‘big girl age’, that she practically vibrating. The morning of the party, Sam surprised her with a new dress, warning her that she could play outside but ‘keep the dress clean until after the party’. Evy took Barney outside for a walk as John, Bobby, Sam, and Dean decorated the living room. As Evy walked around the house, singing and humming to herself, she wasn’t paying attention. She bent down to try and watch a butterfly on a flower, but when it flew away, Evy turned to go back towards the porch. She stopped when she heard a scary sound. When she turned around, there was a dog there, one she’d never seen before. It stood about as tall as Evy, and was baring his teeth at her.   
Dean struggled in the kitchen hanging Evy’s birthday banner. Bobby was inserting four birthday candles into the birthday cake John had picked up at the grocery store. John was pulling the baked spaghetti out of the oven he’d made for lunch. Sam finally stopped laughing at Dean and helped him hang the banner. Just as he was about to go outside and check on Evy, a bloodcurdling scream from outside made all of them tear from the kitchen and run outside.  
At first, they didn’t see her. Sam was the first one to spot it. Fur and teeth and snapping jaws. John, Dean, and Bobby followed suit. It took two seconds, both of which seemed to drag on and on, for Bobby to realize what he had to do. It took four more seconds for him to run inside, grab his rifle, come back out, and aim. Bobby took one breath, prayed he wouldn’t hit Evy, and shot. The dog was hit square in the chest, squealed, fell over and died. John raced over to a still sobbing Evy, who was trying to push herself up and it wasn’t working.  
“Little one, what happened? Are you okay? Where did he hurt you?”   
“He bited me.” Evy shouted. She was shaking, crying, and coughing.  
“Let me see.” John said. “I know you’re hurting and scared, but I need to look at you. Okay?”   
Evy stayed as still as she could, but everything hurt. The dog had scratched her, bitten her, and her arm felt like it was out of place. Her ear was still ringing from the gunshot. Sam held her as Daddy looked at her. Bobby and Dean dragged the body of the dog away. Evy heard Bobby grumbling to himself.   
“Damn Nicholson. This is his dog.”   
“You know this dog?” John asked, still checking Evy over.   
“Yeah. It’s the neighbor’s down the street. It’s never been proven, but he fights those damn dogs.” Bobby said.   
“We’ll deal with it later. We need to get her to the hospital.” Evy suddenly let out another scream. “What? What happened?”   
“I went to pick her up and I touched her arm. I think it’s dislocated.” Sam said regretfully.   
“It hurts!” Evy cried. She was crying so hard she was beginning to get sick.   
“Dad, I can fix it…”   
“No, Sam.” John said. “No. She’s too upset. She’ll never sit still enough. We need to take her to the hospital.” John turned towards Dean. “Dean, you’re driving.”   
“Yes, sir.” Dean said, racing towards the Impala.   
“Little one, look at me.” Evy looked up, holding her arm against herself. “We have to go to the hospital. You’re hurt too badly for us to fix here. Okay?”   
“Daddy, hep me.” Evy said pitifully.   
“I will come here.”   
John very, very carefully picked up the hurt Evy and carried her to the car. Bobby and Sam sat in the back, with John in the front passenger seat, trying to comfort the still crying Evy. John prayed that she wouldn’t get sick, whether from her injuries or purely from crying. When they arrived, John didn’t even wait for Dean to turn off the Impala before he sprinted out of the car and towards the hospital entrance. Evy exhausted herself crying, and after the doctor gave her a small dose of a mild painkiller, she was out like a light. The doctor, a friend of Bobby’s, fixed her arm and gave the good news that her bites and scratches were all superficial.   
“That’s the good news.” The doctor, who insisted on being called Barry, said. “I think you know the bad news, Bobby.”   
“Yeah.” Bobby said. “At least she’s asleep. This won’t wake her up, right?”   
“It shouldn’t, but it might. One of you needs to hold her.”  
“Hold her for what?” Sam asked.   
“Sam, she’s got to have a rabies shot.”   
“Is that necessary?” Sam asked. “Doesn’t that have a lot of side effects?”   
“It can. And I won’t lie. Evy’s small for her age, so there’s an increased risk of severe side effects. But compared to the possibility of her getting rabies…” Barry said.   
“Sam, it’s necessary. If she gets sick, we’ll deal with it.” John said. “Doc, get the shot ready.”   
“N…no…no shot…” a stirring Evy said from the exam bed where she was beginning to wake up.   
“Great.” John said. He’d hoped she would sleep through the shot. At least she slept through him fixing her arm.   
“Daddy…”   
“I’m here, little one.” John said, going over to the bed next to her. “I’m right here.”   
Evy’s eyes opened slowly. “’m I gettin’ a sh…shot?” she slurred.   
“I’m afraid so, little one.” John said. “If you don’t, you might get sick.” He made careful effort not to say you might get sick anyway.   
Evy whimpered, but Sam suddenly had an idea. “Dad? I’ve got an idea. Hold her in your lap.”   
John, curious, turned Evy around so she was facing Sam. Sam picked up a low sitting stool on the other side of the exam room. About that time, Barry came back with the vaccine in his hand. Evy whimpered again, and tried to get away, but John held her firmly and Sam grabbed the hand that wasn’t in a sling.   
“Cricket? Cricket, look at me.”   
“I scawed.” Evy said.  
“I know. Listen, I want you to do something.” He put her hand to his cheek and held it there. “I need you to keep your hand there.”   
“Why?”   
“Because all of a sudden, I’m feeling really sleepy. And I need you to keep me awake. Can you do that?” Sam asked.  
“Why do you have to stay awake?” Evy asked. “Why can’t you go to sleep?”   
“Because if I do, I’ll have to go to bed, and that means I can’t read to you tonight.” Sam explained.  
Evy suddenly looked more alert. “I keeps you up.”   
“Okay. Don’t let my cheek go or look away.”   
“Otay, Sammy, I wont’s.” Evy promised.   
“Hold that cheek, no matter what.” Sam said.   
Evy nodded. “I got it.”   
“You sure, ‘cause I feel kinda…” Sam pretended to nod off and snore.  
Evy giggled and poked Sam’s cheek. “Sammy! No seepin’!”   
Sam pretended to hiccup and jerk awake. “Wha…?” he started to say, but smiled when Evy laughed again.   
Barry used the distraction to stick Evy with the shot. It worked, but not entirely, Evy whimpered, but Sam kept her attention on him.   
“Hand on my cheek, baby. Come on, it’s almost over.”  
“It already is.” Barry said. “You did very well, sweetheart.”   
“No more sots? Jus’ dat one?”   
“Just that one, darlin’.” Barry said. “If it’s alright with your dad, I’ve got a treat for you…”   
Evy eagerly looked up into John’s eyes. “Is okay, Daddy? Pease?”   
John chuckled. “Sure.”   
“Here you go, sweetie.” Barry pulled a Hershey bar out of his pocket and handed it to Evy. “There you go. Just for you.”  
“Tank you, Docta Bawwy.” Evy said. “Sammy, you open for me, pease?”   
“Sure, Cricket.” Sam said.   
Barry told all of them, “You guys are good to go if you’re ready.”   
“Thanks, Barry.” Bobby said. “What about the dog?”   
“Animal control contacted me while I was out getting the vaccine. They’re testing him, but it’ll be a couple days at least before they know for sure. I’ll call you when they know.”  
“Thanks.” John said.   
“No problem. Get this big, brave girl back home. I heard it was someone’s birthday today…”   
“Mine!” Evy said with a smile and a mouthful of chocolate.  
“Happy birthday, darling. I hope you have a better time after you get home.”   
“Tank you.” Evy said. “Daddy, we can still do my party tonight, wight?”   
“I was thinking we wait ‘till tomorrow…”   
“Pease?” Evy begged. John didn’t know if she did it unconsciously or not, but she placed her non hurt hand on her sling. “Pease, Daddy?”   
“Alright, alright.” John caved.   
“Oh, no! Daddy, it gettin’ dark. We forgotted about mommy’s bawwoons!”   
“I didn’t forget, sweetie.” John said.  
“But how she gonna see ‘em?” Evy said, eyes filling with tears.   
“Shh, calm down, little one. It’s always light in heaven. You just have to tell her they’re coming and she’ll see them once they get to heaven.”   
“You pwomise?” Evy asked.  
“Promise.”   
“Otay.” Evy said. “We go home now.”   
“Yes, ma’am. Let’s go.”   
John drove this time, as Evy wanted to sit with Sam. She made sure to keep him awake so she could get her story that night. Bobby and John were eager to go down the street and confront the neighbor about his dog, but Sam convinced them to call the cops and confront him after Evy went to sleep. Finally, long after she should have been in bed, John was gathering the balloons for Evy, holding her, and walking outside with everyone.   
“Daddy, tan I say somefin’ before we let dem go?”   
“Sure, little one. Go ahead.” John said.  
“I want everybody to have some bawwoons.” Evy said, so John distributed them evenly among everyone. Evy held her own balloon tightly in her hand, and swallowed before she started to talk. She spoke slowly so she wouldn’t start crying. “These is for you, mommy. We misses you down here. I wis’ you could have ‘tayed wif us. I hopes you happy up dere. We see you again one day.”   
Evy was the only one who succeeded in hiding her tears. As the balloons floated away, no one could see her, but Missy was there. She was standing just beside John and Evy, who kept her eyes towards the sky. Missy stroked Evy’s cheek, her own heart aching at how much she missed Evy too. She had heard Evy screaming earlier, and had made sure the bullet Bobby fired missed her and hit the dog square in the heart.   
“I miss you too, Kitten. Mommy still loves you.” She kissed Evy’s cheek and finally left back to heaven. Her departure looked like a shooting star, which Evy immediately picked up on.   
“Daddy! Daddy, wook!”   
“What, little one?” John asked. He looked up and saw the shooting star. “Yeah, I see it. Cool…”   
“It’s mommy! She’s waving at us!” Evy insisted.   
John smiled. “I think you’re right, little one. Wave back at her.”  
“Hi, mommy.” Evy said, waving up at the sky. “Wove you.”   
When Evy started to yawn, John suggested, “I think it’s time for bed, little one.”  
“’Kay, Daddy.” Evy said. “Daddy? I hads a bad dweam at da hospital.”  
“Of the dog?” Evy nodded. “You want to sleep with me tonight?”   
“Yes, pease.”   
“I’ll tell you what. Me and uncle Bobby have something to take care of. Sammy’ll give you a bath and you can watch a video with him until I get back. How’s that sound?” John asked.  
“Deal.” Evy said, reaching over for Sam.   
“Okay. We’ll be back, my angel. I love you.”   
“Wove you too, Daddy.” Evy said.


	8. Chapter 8

“Little one, I’m going grocery shopping. You want to go with me?”   
“Sure, Daddy!” Evy said, jumping up from the floor of her room, where she was currently playing with all her blocks.   
John was impressed. She was playing with the playset that Sam had given her for her birthday. There was a mini grocery store, library, school, hospital, doctor’s office, and a few houses, connected by Evy’s carefully constructed roadway. John helped her put on her shoes and socks, then took a closer look at her town.  
“What’s this, little one?”   
“I builded my own town, Daddy!” Evy said proudly.   
“What’s it called?”   
“Evy Town.” Evy said.  
Of course, John thought with a smile. “That’s impressive.”   
“Weally?” Evy grinned.   
God, I never get tired of seeing you smile. Why couldn’t I have done it more the first time around? “Really. You ready to go?”   
“Yeah, let’s go!”   
“We need to decide what to make for dinner.” John said. “What do you think?”   
“Pie.”   
“We can do pie after dinner. What do you want to eat?” John said as they made their way out to the car.   
“Ice cweam.” Evy said with a grin.  
“Little one…” John said, pretending to be stern as he was really biting back a laugh.   
“Otay. Um…” Evy grabbed her chin with her forefinger and thumb, which she did when she was thinking. John lifted her into her car seat and buckled her in. “’sagna.”   
“What?” John asked. It wasn’t often he couldn’t understand her, but this one stumped him.  
“’sagna.” Evy said again.   
“What’s in it?”   
“It wike ‘paghetti but wif the weally big noodles and lots of cheese.” Evy said.  
“Lasagna?” John asked.   
“Yes, sir. ‘sagna.” Evy said.  
“That sounds fantastic.” John said. He reached up and tweaked Evy’s nose, making her blush and try to hide her nose from John. “Let’s go.”   
Once they were on their way, Evy asked from the backseat, “Daddy? When you was my age, what did you want to be when you growed up?”   
Thrown by the out of the woods question, but knowing it was easier to just go with it, John thought about his answer. “Umm, when I was three…”   
“I’s four, Daddy!” Evy corrected him irritably.  
John chuckled. “Oh, yeah. Sorry, I forgot. When I was four, I think I wanted to be a policeman.”   
“You not ‘member?” Evy asked.  
“That was a really long time ago, honey.”   
“Oh. Otay.” Evy said.   
“Why do you ask?”   
“I don’t know. I been tinking about it.” Evy said. “What did mommy do?”   
“Your mom was a home health care nurse. She took care of people who couldn’t leave their house.” John said.  
“Wow. Dat sounds cool.” Evy said.   
“Do you know what you want to be when you grow up?” John asked.  
“I ‘on’t know. I likes building stuff.” Evy said.   
“Like Evy Town?”   
“Exacty.”  
“That sounds good. You know, you might change your mind, and that’s okay. Just remember you can do whatever you want when you grow up, as long as you love what you do. Understand?” John asked, just as they were pulling into the grocery store parking lot.   
“I’s understand.” Evy said. As John turned off the car, Evy asked, “Do I have to wide in da cart, Daddy?”   
Yes and don’t argue about it, John thought, but bit his tongue. He looked around and was surprised to see the store wasn’t that busy, even though it was a Saturday afternoon. John turned around and told Evy very seriously,  
“I’ll let you walk, but you have to listen to me. Why are you not allowed to walk away from me when we’re away from home?”   
“’Cause it’s dang’rous.” Evy said.   
“And why is it dangerous?”   
“’Cause if you can’t see me or hear me, you can’t help me if I get it twouble.” Evy said.   
“Very good. Now, what happens if you do something dangerous?”   
Evy, who was holding Barney, squeezed him tighter and spoke quietly. “I gets a ‘panking.”   
“That’s right. So what happens if I let you walk and you walk away from me?”   
“I gets a ‘panking.” Evy repeated. “I won’t walk away, Daddy.”   
“Okay. When we’re not moving, I want your hand on the cart. If we are moving, I want your hand on my jacket or my shirt. Promise?”   
“Pwomise.” Evy said.   
“Alright. Let’s go.”   
John was relieved when Evy did exactly as told inside the store. She wanted to look at a couple of things, and John praised her for asking first rather than just walking off. He indulged her with an ice cream cone at the Dairy Queen next door to the store. Evy chatted the whole time, swinging her legs back and forth on the bench where they were sitting.   
“Daddy?”   
“Yes, little one?” John said. As much as he loved being with Evy, he was getting a little tired of hearing ‘Daddy’.   
“I wikes it when it jus’ you and me.”   
John’s heart melted. “I like it too. In fact, I love it.” He kissed her cheek and tickled her. “You done?”   
“Amost.” Evy said. “I only gots a wittle weft.”   
“Where?”   
“Wight here.” Evy said, and John was left startled when she took her two hands and dove for his stomach.   
She’s tickling me! John thought. “Why, you little…”   
Evy was giggling so hard she couldn’t breathe. “I tickled Daddy!” she said proudly.   
“You sure did.” John said, and he was surprised to find he was actually laughing as hard as she was. “You ready to go now?”   
“Yes, Da…” Evy suddenly stopped and jumped into John’s lap, shaking. She buried her face into his neck, not wanting to look up.   
“Little one, what is it?” Evy just pointed to another table a couple feet away from them. An owner, an older man in his eighties, was sitting there with his large German Shepard. “It’s okay, little one. Daddy’s here, he won’t hurt you.”   
The older man noticed Evy shaking and asked, “Is she afraid of the dog?”   
“A little.” John said.   
“Oh, I’m sorry. He won’t hurt you, sweetie. He can’t.”   
Evy, intrigued, looked up and asked, “He tan’t? Why not?”   
“He’s an old dog, just like me.” The old man said. “He doesn’t even have any teeth.”   
“He ‘till got cwaws, though.”   
John explained to the older man, “She was attacked by our neighbor’s dog a few weeks ago. She dislocated her arm and got a few bites and scratches.”   
“Oh, I’m sorry.” The older man said again. “That must have scared you to pieces.”   
Evy nodded sadly.  
“Well, Rufus here won’t hurt you. He might kiss you to death, but he won’t hurt you.” The old man patted the dog, who licked his hand. “If it’s alright with your father, would you like to pet him?”   
Evy thought about it very carefully. The dog did look friendly, not scary like the one that had hurt her. Dean, Sam, and John had all explained to her that the dog came after her because the man he lived with was really mean to him, and didn’t give him enough to eat or treat him very nicely. She felt sorry for the dog, but it hadn’t stopped Evy from being afraid since. But Evy was tired of being scared. She wanted to pet the dog. She turned to John and asked,  
“Can I, Daddy?”   
John was surprised to say the least. “If you want to.”   
Evy nodded. “I do.” Evy climbed down off John’s lap and approached the dog slowly. “What’s his name?”   
“His name’s Lou.” The older man said. “Mine’s Grant.”   
“Hi, Mr. Gwant.” Evy turned to John. “Can I tell’s him my name, Daddy?”   
John nodded, making a note to praise her again later for asking his permission to talk to a stranger.   
“I’s Evy.” Evy told him, reaching her hand out for Grant to shake.  
“Well, you are a very polite young lady, Evy.” Grant said, shaking her hand back.   
Evy bent down in front of Lou, who looked at her curiously but made no move towards her. “Hi, Wou.”   
Lou lifted his nose a little, but made no noise.   
“He really likes it when you scratch his leg.”   
“Can I pets you, Wou? I pwomise I be weal gentle.” Evy said. Evy took Grant’s advice and gently scratched Lou’s leg. Lou responded by rapidly beating his back leg on the pavement, and Evy, frightened, immediately stopped what she was doing. “I’s sowwy! Is I huwtin’ you?”   
Grant laughed heartily. “No, sweetie. You didn’t hurt him. That means he likes it.”   
“Weally?” Evy said, and reached out to scratch Lou again. John, who had been sitting on the bench on the edge of his seat and holding his breath, let it go when Lou started to lick Evy’s face and Evy started to giggle. “Wou, you siwwy!”  
They stayed a few more minutes, Evy playing with Lou while Grant and John talked. When Grant’s ice cream was gone, he turned and said, “Well, Evy, it was nice to meet you. But me and Lou need to go home now.”   
“Otay. Can I gives Wou a hug bye?” Evy asked.  
“I don’t think he’d let me leave if you didn’t.”   
Evy wrapped her arms around Lou’s neck and said enthusiastically, “Bye, Wou!”   
Lou licked Evy’s face and barked sofly.   
“Bye, Mr. Gwant!” Evy said.  
“Bye, Evy.”   
Evy ran back over to John. “Daddy, I did it! I’s not scawed no more!”   
“You did do it. I’m very proud of you, little one.”   
“Daddy, we go home now?” Evy said. “I wanna tell evewybody about it.”   
“We sure can. Come on.” John said, taking Evy’s hand and walking back towards the Impala. He buckled her in to her car seat, and couldn’t resist telling her about it again. “You were very good and very brave today. I’m so proud of you.”   
Evy smiled. “Wove you, Daddy.”   
“Love you too, my brave little angel. I love you too.”


	9. Chapter 9

“Daddy, do you have to go?”   
“I’m afraid so, little one.” John said. “Miss Ellen needs my help reopening her roadhouse.”  
“Can I go too?”   
“We’ve already talked about this.” John said. “Don’t you want to stay with Sammy?”   
“I wike staying with Sammy but I gonna miss you.”   
“Oh, I’ll miss you too, little one. But I’ll only be gone a few days. You won’t even have time to miss me.” John promised.   
“I alweady do, and you not even gone yet.”   
John kissed Evy’s forehead. “Everything’ll be okay. I’ll call you every single day. And uncle Bobby and Dean may even come back too.”   
“’Kay, Daddy. You’ll tell me bye before you leave, wight?” Evy asked.  
“I’ll come in and give you a kiss, but I’m not waking you up. I’m leaving before the son comes up.” John said. “Sam’ll wake you up when it’s time to leave.”   
“Otay.” Evy said, slumping over in defeat.   
“You want me to stay until you go to sleep?”   
Evy nodded and smiled. She loved when Daddy stayed with her. She felt safe, like nothing could get to her, no matter how big or scary it might be. When she fell asleep, Daddy was rubbing her back and singing to her. When she woke up the next morning, she was surprised that no one had come to check on her. That usually woke her up, and she would stay awake until her naptime. Evy climbed down from her bed, grabbed Barney, and walked out to the kitchen. Sammy was there, making breakfast.   
“Hi, Sammy.” Evy said as she walked over and hugged his leg.   
“Hey, Cricket. I didn’t hear you get up.”   
“Did Daddy leave?” Evy asked.  
“Yeah, he left a couple hours ago.” Sam said.   
“Oh.” Evy said, disappointed.   
“He said he’d call around lunchtime.” Sam said, trying to cheer her up.   
“’Kay.”  
“Hey. We’ll have fun today. I promise.” Sam said, putting some eggs on a plate as Evy climbed to the table.   
“I know.” Evy then remembered something. “Don’t you have to work?”   
“I don’t today, but I do have to go in tomorrow.” Sam said. “I wanted to talk to you about that, actually.”   
“What ‘bout?” Evy asked, taking her first mouthful of eggs.  
“Well, uncle Bobby and Dean called. They’re gonna be gone a few more days too. So you’re gonna go to daycare.”   
“What’s dat?” Evy asked.   
“Well, you’re gonna hang out with some other kids and play while I go to work.”   
“Oh.” Evy said. “Otay.”   
“What’s wrong?” Sam asked.   
“I never weally hanged out with other kids before.” Evy said. “What if dey don’t wike me?”   
“Of course they’ll like you.” Sam said. “I do.”   
“But you my brother. You has to.”   
“I don’t just like you because you’re my sister.” Sam explained.   
“What you mean?”   
“I like you because you’re smart, you’re funny, you’re brave, you’re kind. Not just because you’re my sister. And if I see that, other people will too.” Sam explained. “Does that make sense?”   
“I guess.” Evy said.   
“You’ll have fun tomorrow, too.” Sam promised. “What do you want to do today?”   
“Will you push me on the swing outside?” Evy asked as she swallowed a mouthful of egg.   
“I would love to. You want me to teach you how to push yourself on the swing?”   
“I can do it myself?” Evy asked, amazed.   
“Sure. It’s easy. I’ll show you. Finish your breakfast and go get dressed and we’ll go.”   
“Sammy? Why do you have to get dressed if you not weaving the house?” Evy asked.  
“Because if you don’t get dressed you have to go back to bed.”   
“I get dwessed.” Evy said, and Sam hid a smile as he finished his own breakfast.   
Their first day together was fun for both of them. Evy struggled a little with learning how to push herself, but practiced hard. Sam sat at a table Bobby kept outside and did some paperwork, taking occasional glances up at Evy. Every time he did, he saw her tongue sticking out as she tried to learn her new skill. Finally, around lunchtime, she had it. They played catch after eating, and Evy reluctantly took a nap. John called right after she took a bath. By the time she went to bed, she was a happy, healthy, well-fed little girl.   
“I had fun today, Sammy. Fank you.”   
“You’re welcome, baby. I had fun too.” Sam said. “You should get to sleep. You’re gonna have to get up earlier than normal tomorrow.”   
“Otay. Night night, Sammy.” Evy said with a yawn.   
“Good night, baby. Love you.”   
When Sam woke the next morning, he knew almost immediately their second day wasn’t going to be as smooth as the first. He had to be at the office no later than seven, and had elected to wake Evy up as late as possible. She typically woke herself up between seven and seven fifteen every morning, so Sam hoped that waking her up only a half hour early wouldn’t be too much of an adjustment. He was dead wrong. It was six fifteen when he heard it. A nasty cough coming from Evy’s room. Concerned, Sam ran to her room to check on her.   
“Cricket, you okay?” Sam asked, hoping she had just swallowed wrong.  
“I don’t feel so good.” Evy said.   
Wonderful. I have to go to work with a sick kid. “Come here.” Sam felt her forehead and was relieved to find there was no fever. “I think you’ll be okay.” Sam walked down the hall to the bathroom and prepared a dose of the children’s cough medicine he’d picked up the last time she’d been sick. “Here, drink this.”   
Evy scrunched her nose. “That stuff’s yucky.”   
“You sure about that? Because I could have sworn it tasted like grape juice…”   
“Nuh uh.” Evy argued. “It tastes wike…”  
Sam, who would normally have patiently coaxed Evy into taking her medicine, was running low on patience. He took advantage of Evy arguing with him and quickly squirted the syringe in her mouth. Evy gagged, but only spit out a miniscule amount of the medicine.   
“Sammy!” Evy sputtered. “Dat was mean!”   
“I’m sorry, Cricket, I really am, but we don’t have a lot of time. Come on, I need you to get up and get dressed.”   
Evy just stared at him and pouted.   
“Now, Cricket. Come on!” Sam said, picking her up and setting her on the floor.   
“Can I has a juice box?” Evy asked.   
“You can while you eat breakfast. Come on, what do you want to wear?”   
“But that stuff still tastes yucky…” Evy whined.   
“So the quicker you get dressed the quicker it will be gone!” Sam snapped, immediately regretting it when Evy’s eyes filled with tears. He gathered his composure and tried to smooth the situation over. “Why don’t you pick out your own clothes?”   
“’Kay.” Evy said, though she still wary of Sam.   
She was used to him being the most patient of everyone in the house, and was not used to him yelling at her. Sam did feel guilty for snapping, and tried to be patient with her the rest of the morning, but they really were in a hurry. Somehow, miraculously, thirty minutes later Evy was dressed, fed, had used the bathroom, and they were ready to leave the house.   
“Alright, Cricket. Let’s go.”   
“Wait! I needs Barney!” Evy said, trying to pull away from Sam’s hand.   
“Maybe you should leave him here…”   
“No! I can’t! He’ll be wonely.” Evy said, the very prospect of leaving Barney behind even scarier than Sam being mad with her. “Pease, Sammy.”  
Sam sighed. “Okay, go get him. Very, very quickly.”   
Evy ran to her room and looked around. She spotted Barney’s horn sticking out from underneath the blanket. She grabbed him and hugged him, apologized for almost forgetting him, then ran back out when Sam yelled at her to hurry up. Evy, mad that Sam was still being mean to her, took her time and walked back out to Sam with the speed of a snail. Sam said nothing, just stood there with his arm outstretched. Evy took it, and it was a tense ride to the day care center. Sam faced another stumbling block at the day care center. Evy was coughing again, and the day care director refused to take her, even without a fever. Evy heard Sam arguing the decision, feeling bad that she’d now be in the way at Sam’s office. She made up her mind to be extra good at the office, and took Sam’s hand again without being told, smiled when he told her she’d have to go to work with him, and walked into his office very quietly. Sam found a chair in his office that wasn’t too big for her, and sat her at the end of his desk.   
“I’m sorry you couldn’t go to daycare today.”   
“Is okay.” Evy said. “I wikes being wif you.”   
Sam smiled. “I like it too. I’ve got a little work to do right now though, okay?”   
Evy sniffed. “What am I gonna do?”   
The best idea Sam could come up with was to get a piece of computer paper out of his printer. He quickly copied the alphabet in big print letters, and found a box of crayons he kept in the office for the past few times Evy had come to visit him.   
“Copy that for me, okay?”   
“Otay!” Evy said, and immediately got to work. That kept her occupied for a surprisingly long time, but unfortunately, just as Sam was knee deep in work, Evy called, “I finissed!”   
“That’s good, Cricket, one second.”   
Evy waited as Sam answered phone calls, eventually getting down from the stool to play on the floor with Barney. She and Barney played together, and Evy happily chatted with him for a few minutes before Sam said from his desk,   
“Hey, Cricket. I need you to play quietly.”   
That’s no fun! Evy thought to herself, but remembered her promise to be good. “Otay. Sowwy, Sammy.”   
Had Sam not been so busy, he might have noticed that Evy was sounding more congested. “It’s okay.”   
Sam went back to work. Evy was getting bored. Really bored. She asked Sam for some more paper, and sat down on the floor and drew a few pictures. She jumped when she felt Sam suddenly pull her up off the floor and set her on her feet.  
“Come on, Cricket. We have to go. Get your jacket on.”   
“Where we going?” Evy asked as she pulled on her coat. “We goin’ home?”   
“Not now, baby. I’ve got to go to court.”   
“Weally? Cool! Can I watch?” Evy asked.   
Sam sighed. “Yes. But while we’re there, you have to stay quiet. Very, very quiet.”   
“Pwomise.” Evy said, but started coughing again.   
This time Sam did notice that she seemed sicker than that morning. “You okay, Cricket?”   
“I’s otay.” Evy said. “Can I gets some water ‘fore we go?”   
“Sure.” Sam said. He took her into the hallway and helped her drink from the water fountain. “That better?” Sam asked. Evy nodded and Sam smiled at her. “Okay. Come on, let’s go.”   
Evy left and was surprised that they were walking down to the courthouse. Sam picked her up and carried her so they could go faster. Normally, Evy didn’t like that; she wasn’t a baby and didn’t need to be carried. But Sam was in a hurry, so she didn’t argue. He sat her down right behind him in the courtroom, and a few minutes later, the judge walked in. Evy tried to be quiet like Sam had told her to, but she couldn’t help it. She started coughing and couldn’t stop. The judge, an old, cranky man in his eighties, finally lost his patience.   
“Why is there a small child in here today? A small, clearly sick child?”   
“I’m sorry, your honor. That’s my sister. My father’s out of town and I wasn’t able to make other arrangements today…”   
“Then I suggest you ask for a continuance, Mr. Winchester. Is that what you’d like to do?” the judge asked.   
Reluctantly, Sam answered, “Yes, your honor.”   
“Very well. We’ll continue until tomorrow. I suggest you make sure you make sure you do have other arrangements tomorrow, Mr. Winchester. I don’t like my time being wasted.”   
“Yes, your honor. My apologies.” Sam said again. The judge dismissed, and Sam quickly turned to his client. “Becky, I’m sorry…”   
“It’s okay, Sam. I’ve been a single mom for a long time. I get trying to work and deal with a sick kid. Relax, you’re doing great.” Becky turned to Evy, who had finally been able to stop coughing, and now sat looking at her feet. “I hope you feel better, sweetie.”   
“Tank you.” Evy said quietly, not willing to look up. She didn’t want to see how disappointed Sam was bound to be in her.   
Becky left, and as the judge had dismissed for lunch, the room was now almost completely empty. Sam, annoyed, gathered up his briefcase and walked over and grabbed Evy’s hand.   
“Come on, let’s go.”   
Evy took his hand and walked slowly, and Sam eventually picked her up again. He said nothing as they got back to the office. Evy picked up Barney and sat back down on the floor, leaning against Sam’s desk. Her eyes were heavy with sleep, but there was nowhere to sleep. If she’d been at home, uncle Bobby would have put her to bed or held her while she slept. Evy’s stomach rumbled, and she wondered if it was close to lunchtime yet. She decided to stand up and ask cautiously,   
“Sammy? I’s hungwy. Is it almost time for wunch?”   
Sam’s annoyance at his case being continued took over, and he took the pen that was in his hand and slammed it down on the desk, making Evy jump. “No, it isn’t!”   
Evy couldn’t help it. Sam was never mad at her. She was trying hard to be good, to make him proud of her, but she was tired, hungry, and sick. She started crying, which made her cough even more. Sam felt lower than a snake. He realized that Evy thought he was annoyed with her, and he wasn’t. He was losing the case he was working on, and it was annoying him to no end. Sam put down the pen and walked over, picked Evy up and sat her in his lap.   
“I sowwy, Sammy. I not twying to be bad…”   
“Shhh. Look up at me, baby.” Evy looked up and Sam wiped her face of the tears that were still falling. “You’re not being bad. I’m sorry. I know you don’t feel good right now. I know I’ve been impatient with you, and dragged you from place to place. I’m so sorry, baby.” Sam looked at his desk and asked, “How about I pack this stuff up and we go back home?”   
“You not have to work?” Evy asked.   
“I can work at home while you’re sleeping. When you wake up, we’ll do something together. Just you and me. How’s that sound?”   
“You sure? I not want to be in da way.” Evy said.  
“You could never be in the way.” Sam said, reaching over to kiss Evy’s cheek. “Come on, go get Barney. Let’s go home.”   
“’Kay. Tan I tome back when I not sick no more?”   
“Of course you can.” Sam said. “Let’s go.”   
Sam took her home, gave her some more of the cough medicine from that morning, and held her in her bed until she finally went to sleep. He worked the two hours she slept, and had a breakthrough in his case. When Evy woke up, she felt much better, and Sam held her, tickled her, kissed her, and hugged her, trying to soothe his own guilt for how he’d acted earlier in the day. When she was asleep again that night, Sam whispered goodnight to her again.   
“I love you, Cricket. Good night.”   
The next day, just as he was leaving, a man showed up at Sam’s office. He looked to be a little older than Dean, and seemed friendly enough. He asked Sam for some directions, and after Sam gave them, the man thanked him, took his hand and introduced himself. Sam left, ready to go pick up Evy from the daycare across the street and head back home. He decided that the feeling of dread in his stomach was just him being paranoid. He watched the man from his office get into his car and drive away. He’d already forgotten the stranger’s name.   
His name was Gordon Walker.


	10. Chapter 10

Evy was happy that day. Everybody was home. Daddy, uncle Bobby, Sam, and Dean were all there, and they were all playing with her. As Evy ate her lunch, she suddenly stopped. She couldn’t explain why, but she felt like something was wrong. She took a long look outside the window, and John, concerned about how quiet she’d gotten suddenly.   
“Hey. Little one, you okay?”   
Evy turned back to John and said, “Yeah, I’s okay.”   
“You’re really quiet. Are you sure?”   
“I was jus’ thinkin’.” Evy said.  
“What are you thinking about, Cricket?”   
Evy made something up, not sure how to explain that she thought something was wrong, but she didn’t know what. The rest of the day, the feeling followed her. It bothered her. Everything seemed okay. So what could be wrong? Evy fell asleep on Bobby’s couch that night, watching a movie with Sam and Dean, so the last thing she remembered before falling asleep was listening to Scooby Doo whining about a possible ghost.   
The next thing Evy knew, she felt herself moving. She was still half asleep, so at first she thought she was dreaming. She was riding in a car, but she couldn’t tell right away which one. Evy opened her eyes, curious as to where she was going and why. When she was awake, Evy realized that she didn’t know this car, and she didn’t know the man driving. She tried to jump, but her feet and hands were tied up tightly.   
“Who are you?” Evy asked, trying to sound brave.   
“Don’t worry about it, kid.”   
“Where’s my daddy?” Evy insisted.   
Without taking his eyes off the road, the man behind the wheel took his hand and slapped Evy hard across the face. She cried out, but couldn’t rub her cheek to take the sting out. The man, who Evy thought looked familiar but she couldn’t exactly tell who he was, just put his hand back on the steering wheel. While Evy cried in the seat beside him, he said simply,  
“I’m only gonna tell you this once. Shut up. I’m not gonna deal with your whining or crying on the way to where we’re going. Sit back and shut up, or you get more of what you just got.”   
“Why you doing this?” Evy asked quietly.   
“You’ll find out.” The man said. “Now shut up.”   
Back at Bobby’s house, two hours after Evy had woken up in the car, John was just beginning to stir. He headed to the kitchen and started to make some coffee. But before he did, he walked to Evy’s room to check on her. Stepping inside, everything was left the way it had been the night before. Evy had Evy Town on the small table inside of her room. The rest of the room was meticulously neat, a trait that John hoped Evy would never lose. He crept across the floor and over to her bed, when he noticed that the bedspread was flat. Weird, he thought. When did she get up? Just as he thought that, he heard the toilet from the bathroom down the hall flush. He exhaled in relief; she had just gone to the bathroom. He stepped out into the hall, expecting to run into Evy, but it wasn’t Evy. It was Sam.   
“Sam, have you seen your sister?”   
“No. Isn’t she in bed?” Sam asked.  
“No, she’s not. Did she get in bed with you or Dean last night?”   
“Not with me. And I didn’t hear the door open, so I don’t think she went to sleep with Dean.” Sam said.   
John said nothing else, just went down the hall and opened Sam and Dean’s bedroom door. He was trying to swallow his panic, to keep it from overriding his senses, hoping that she had just climbed quietly into bed with Dean the night before. With Sam following, John ripped the covers off Dean’s bed, who instinctively jumped up and shouted in surprise.  
“What the hell?”   
“Dean, did your sister get in bed with you last night?” John asked, his heart now pounding so hard he could barely breathe.  
“What? No…” Dean said. “Where is she?”   
“That’s what we’re trying to figure out.”   
“What in the hell is all this racket?” Bobby came out of his room asking. “Can’t a guy get some sleep in here?”   
“Bobby, is Evy with you?” Sam asked.   
“No. Ain’t she in bed?”   
“Shit.” John muttered under his breath, running a hand through his hair.  
“What’s wrong?” Dean asked.  
“She’s missing.” Sam said. “She’s not in bed or in the bathroom.”   
“Boys, Bobby and I’ll check the house. You two check outside….” John started to say.   
“Dad, she wouldn’t go outside in the dark by herself.” Sam said.  
“I know. Just check. Please.” Ten minutes later, when they were all back together in the living room, a distraught John asked, “Where the hell could she be?”   
“John, when you checked her room, did you see any sign of anything supernatural?” Bobby asked.   
“No. Nothing.”   
“Then we should call the cops.” Bobby said firmly.   
“Bobby…”   
“I know what you’re going to say.” Bobby stopped him. “But we’ll call Jody and….” Before Bobby could say anything else, his cell phone rang. “Ellen, now’s not a good time…”  
“I only need a second, Bobby. I just wanted to let you know that Gordon Walker’s on his way to South Dakota.”   
“Gordon Walker?” Bobby said. “I thought he got flattened by a truck or something.”   
“He got hit by a truck a few months ago. He laid low in the hospital until he got better. A friend of mine called from a roadside bar in North Dakota a few minutes ago and said she saw Gordon last night. She told me Gordon was making a big deal about how he was going to Sioux Falls to take revenge on someone.”   
“Ellen, wait? Did you say Gordon Walker?” Sam asked.   
“Yeah, Sam, I did.”   
“How do you know him?” Dean asked.  
“A guy came into my office while Dad was visiting Ellen a couple of weeks ago asking for directions. He said his name was Gordon Walker.” Sam said.   
“What did he look like?”   
“Hold on. I can access the camera from the office on my cell phone.” Sam looked up the footage, fast forwarded to just before leaving, and paused on Gordon’s face. “Is this him?”   
“Son of a bitch.” Dean said.   
“Dean, Bobby, care to explain?”   
“In a minute.” Bobby said. “Ellen, Evy’s missing. And Gordon’s been here in the last week. Do me a favor and get as many hunters to my house as you can get.”   
“Yeah, you got it. How long has she been missing?”   
“We don’t know. John woke up and she wasn’t in her bed.” Bobby said.   
“How did he get into your house, Bobby?” Ellen asked.  
“I don’t know, but you can bet I’m gonna find out.” Bobby said. “Ellen, call me back when you can. I got to catch up John and Sam.”   
“Okay, I will. You guys be careful.” Ellen said.   
“Thanks.” Bobby hung up with Ellen and quickly filled John in. “Me and Dean worked with Gordon a while back. Good hunter, but a real son of a bitch. Made a big deal over how anything not human shouldn’t be allowed to live.”   
“Bobby, I just thought of something.” Dean said. “You remember that case we worked with Gordon?”   
“Yeah. The zombie case.”  
“You remember what he said? About how what’s dead should stay dead?” Dean asked.   
Bobby’s face turned grave. “Yeah. I do.”   
“What if he found out how she came back here?”   
“But how would he know about that? Did you two tell him?” John asked.  
“No, we didn’t. But we have to assume he knows. It’s all we’ve got to go on.”   
Evy was more scared than she’d ever been before, but she was still trying to be brave. She wondered how this man, who still hadn’t told her his name, had gotten her out of bed and into his car without her knowing. Her cheek still hurt from where he’d hit her. Evy wished she could fight him off. But as hard as she tried, she couldn’t get herself untied, and even if she could, she doubted she’d be big enough to do anything to him. They hadn’t stopped driving. She was cold, because she was still sleeping in the thin pajamas she’d put on the night before. She had to go to the bathroom, but was afraid to say anything and didn’t know how much longer she’d be able to hold it. She thought about wetting herself just to make him mad, but was too afraid he’d hit her again, or worse. So she just sat there, looking out the window and hoping that someone would find her soon. Finally, when she couldn’t stand it anymore, she spoke up.  
“Mister?”   
“What?” He asked irritably.   
“I gotta go potty.”   
“Hold it.” He said, gripping the steering wheel tighter.   
Evy, infuriated, said to him, “I’m just a wittle kid, stupid. You want me to go in the car?”   
“You do and I’ll hit you again, more than once. Watch your mouth, stupid.”   
Evy glared at him, but didn’t say anything else. She was surprised when he pulled the car over and pulled her out. Evy looked for other cars coming down, cars that she could signal and scream to for help. But there was no one coming. The man grabbed her arm untied her hands. Evy tried to move away from him, but he grabbed her shoulder hard.   
“Go.”   
“Turn awound.” Evy said. “I’m not going wif you watching me.”   
The man gripped Evy’s shoulder so hard it made her ‘ow’ out loud. He bent down and got very close to her face. Close enough that if Evy moved at all, her nose and his would touch. Evy tried pushing his hand away from her arm, but all it did was make him swat the back of her leg hard.  
“Listen to me and listen to me good. I’m gonna get back in the front driver’s seat. You’ve got two minutes. If you take longer than that, or you try to move away from the car, or you scream, I will go back and I will your dad, your brothers, and your uncle. Do you understand me?”   
Any desire Evy had to fight him was gone. “Don’t huwt them. Pwease.”   
“Then you better change your attitude. Real quick. You don’t speak unless spoken to, and when I ask you a question, you answer it. Got it?”   
“Got it.” Evy said quietly.  
“Alright.” He reached down and finished untying her. “I’ll leave you untied the rest of the trip. But remember what I said. You try to call for help, I go back and kill everyone you love.”   
“I’ll ‘tay.” Evy said. “I sowwy.”   
“That’s better.” He said. “My name’s Gordon. We’ll talk more when we get to where we’re going.”   
“’Kay.” Evy said.   
She quickly used the bathroom and climbed back in the car. As soon as she closed the door, Gordon kept driving. Evy stared out the window, shaking and still trying no to cry. She had to be brave until Daddy and Deanie and Sammy and uncle Bobby found her. But it was getting harder and harder as the minutes passed. As Evy felt one tear fall down her cheek, she thought to herself Help me, Daddy. I want to go home.


	11. Chapter 11

The car finally stopped, and Evy was happy to be able to get out and walk. They had started driving when it was dark and now it was dark again, so Evy knew that a whole day had passed. Gordon hadn’t let her eat or drink all day, and she had a bad headache. Gordon pulled her out of the car and made her walk into a house. Evy was so tired, hungry, and thirsty that she never even looked around; she just walked where Gordon made her walk. He led her down into the basement, where there was only a metal chair, a table, and a pitcher of water.   
“Sit down.”  
“Pease, can I get some water?” Evy asked, her voice hoarse and scratchy.  
“I’ll get it. Just sit your ass down.” Gordon ordered again.   
Evy wanted to snap at him, tell him to stop being mean to her, but she didn’t. His threat from earlier scared her more than anything else. She had no idea where she was, why Gordon wanted her, or what he planned to do with her. She wondered if her family was looking for her. Gordon came back down, carrying a big black duffel bag that he threw onto the table. He poured Evy a glass of water, and pulled something out of his pocket, which he opened and handed to her. It was a granola bar. Evy normally didn’t like them, but she was so hungry she didn’t care anymore.   
“Thank you.” She said. She didn’t feel thankful, but she hoped acting polite to him would make him be nicer to her.   
Gordon moved over to the table and stood against it. He crossed his arms against his chest and watched as Evy ate the granola bar and drank the water. He said nothing, just stared at Evy, making her uncomfortable and wondering what he was planning to do. Finally, after what felt like a long time, Gordon started to talk.   
“I guess you’re wondering why I took you.”   
“Yeah.” Evy said quietly.   
“Well, you see, I looked into you. How old are you?”   
“I not ‘posed to talk to strangers.” Evy said.   
“It’s also a bad idea to take food and water from strangers, but you did that. Now I’ll ask you again. How old are you?”   
“I’m not talking to you.” Evy insisted. Even though she remembered his threat from earlier, she was afraid to tell him too much. “I don’t have to.”   
“Who says you don’t have to?” Gordon asked. “I’m the only one here.”  
“I don’t have to talk to you.” Evy repeated.  
Gordon laughed. “You’re a stubborn kid. Just like your brother.”   
Evy stopped and looked at Gordon, mouth open in shock. “You know my bwother? Which one?”   
“Dean. And your uncle Bobby.” Gordon said.   
“How?”   
“I hunted with them a few years ago.” Gordon answered her.   
“Hunted?” Evy asked, confused. She knew uncle Bobby liked to go hunting, and had even offered to take her with him once he got older, but Dean didn’t usually go with him. “Deanie doesn’t like to hunt.”   
“Oh, yes, he does. Haven’t you ever wondered where your brother and uncle go when they’re gone for days at a time?” Gordon asked.  
“They working.” Evy said. “They help find people that nobody else can find.”   
Gordon laughed. “Is that what they told you? Hate to break it to you, kid. They’re not looking for people. Your brother and uncle, and your dad a long time ago, kill monsters. They don’t help people.”   
“You’re lying!” Evy said, wanting to yell but not able to. “Monsters aren’t real. They’re pretend. Uncle Baby and Deanie save people. My daddy fixes cars.”   
“Think whatever you want, kid.” Gordon said with a smile that made Evy cringe. “Your mom used to do it too.”   
“My mommy was a nurse! Stop lying!” Evy said. Her chest hurt, but she was too tired to cry.   
“Man, they really laid it on thick with you, didn’t they?” Gordon laughed. “Man.”   
“Why’d you take me?” Evy asked.  
Gordon stopped laughing and got serious. “Because you shouldn’t be here.”   
“What does that mean?”   
“It means you shouldn’t be alive.”  
As Gordon was talking to Evy, trying to isolate and scare her, the situation at Bobby’s was the exact opposite. Ellen had tried to rally a few of the closest hunters, but the only one who had been able to come was Caleb, who John had called himself. Jody Mills, the local sheriff, was also there, trying to talk Bobby and John into letting her release Evy’s picture to the local media.   
“Jody, I don’t want to tip Gordon off…” John argued.  
“Listen to me.” Jody said. “Please, please hear me. I promise I will not say anything to anyone about who Gordon really is or what he does. But missing children, especially Evy’s age, get people looking. That’s what we need. Gordon won’t be expecting that kind of a response. He’s hoping you’ll keep this quiet.”   
“But Gordon isn’t the type to respond well to surprises.” Bobby said. “What if he hurts her?”   
“I know you guys don’t want to hear this. But chances are he already has.” John, Sam, and Dean visibly tensed at that. “I’m sorry, guys. But it’s true. This will help us get a drop on Gordon. It’ll get his picture out to gas stations, supermarkets, anywhere he might stop for supplies. It’ll put a serious kink in him getting very far. It’ll give us the easiest way to find Evy and find her fast.”   
Bobby and John looked at each other, their decades of friendship allowing them to talk without saying a word. They nodded to each other, but there were two others whose opinion warranted consideration. John asked Sam and Dean,   
“Boys, what do you think?”   
“Do it.” Sam and Dean said at the same time.   
“Do it, Jody.” Bobby said. “And thanks.”   
“You got it, guys.” Jody said. “Have you figured out how he got in and took her?”   
“Bobby! John! Get in here!” Everyone ran down the hall to Evy’s room, where Caleb had been trying to figure that out. “Look at this.”   
Caleb was pointing underneath Evy’s bed. The carpet that had been there was cut up and carefully put back into place. Caleb was holding up a board, just big enough for someone Gordon’s size to fit through and climb down. Bobby looked inside the hole. Evy’s room was directly above the basement. It made a little more sense now. Gordon had somehow snuck into Bobby’s house, down into the basement, and made the hole through to Evy’s room. Bobby intuitively knew that Gordon had been watching them. He had to know everyone’s routine, know exactly when they would all likely be asleep, and when would be the best time to snatch Evy. Bobby guessed that he had also drugged Evy somehow; the kid could sleep through a hurricane, unless someone was touching her. When Bobby stood up, he noticed John was shaking.   
“John? You okay?”   
“It’ll never be over, will it?” John asked.  
“What’ll never be over, Dad?” Dean asked.  
But Bobby knew what John was talking about. He asked Caleb to go help Jody, and Bobby said, “John, you can’t blame yourself for this.”   
“Why not? It’s my fault.” John said.   
“How the hell do you put that together?” Bobby asked.  
“I can never really leave the life, can I? I let my guard down because I thought it was safe enough.” John said.  
“Dad, stop.” Sam tried. “It won’t help her to blame yourself.”   
“Sam’s right, Dad. Gordon’s a sick, paranoid son of a bitch. But he’s smart too. He would have found a way to take her if he was determined.” Dean said.   
“But why?” John asked. “Why would he come after a four-year old girl? Did either of you tell him about her?”   
“No, Dad, of course we didn’t…” Dean said, then suddenly remembered something. “Bobby? You don’t think he did this because of that stupid argument he and I had, do you?”   
“What argument, Dean?” John asked.  
“Dean and Gordon got into it because Gordon got himself caught by the vampire he was helping us fight. Dean saved him, but instead of being grateful, Gordon swore he’d never work with Dean again.” Bobby explained.  
“He’s pissed because you saved him?” Sam asked.  
“That’s not how Gordon saw it.” Dean said.   
“Okay, guys.” Jody came back in, hanging up her cell phone. “Evy’s picture is going out to all the news stations in this state and the bordering ones. Her picture and Gordon’s are flooding the streets as we speak.”   
“Thanks, Jody.” Bobby said. “We mean it.”   
“Yeah.” John said. “I’m sorry I gave you a hard time about it…”   
“Don’t worry about it. And don’t thank me until she comes home.” Jody said. “I’m going back to the station to try and coordinate. You want me to get an officer to stay here?”   
“No.” Bobby said. “Thanks, anyway.”   
“Okay. I know better than to tell you not to work this case. Just promise me if you get a lead, you’ll call and tell me.”   
“You got it. See you soon, Jody.” Bobby agreed.   
“Okay.” Jody turned to John, who was barely keeping it together. “We’ve got everyone in five states out looking for her. We will bring her home.”   
John nodded. “Yeah.”   
“Boys, call me if you need anything.”   
Jody left, and Bobby and Dean followed. Sam tried to get John to eat something, but John refused. He asked Sam to leave him alone in Evy’s room for a minute, and when Sam left, John sat down on Evy’s bed. He felt an emptiness inside him that he’d felt before, when Evy died, but he’d hoped to never feel again. He was taking shallow breaths, mostly because it hurt to breathe. Evy was out there somewhere, with an unstable madman, one who didn’t believe she should even be alive. John saw, on Evy’s bookshelf, a folded up piece of paper. Curious, John grabbed it and sat back down. He unfolded the paper and his breath caught in his throat. It was a birthday card. For him. Evy had drawn it, and in big letters at the top, she’d carefully written in crayon ‘Happy Birthday Daddy! I love you’. John couldn’t stop the tears coming now. He held the card close to his heart and looked out the window. I love you too, little one. Hang on. Daddy’s coming.


	12. Chapter 12

“You shouldn’t be alive.”  
“What does that mean?” Evy asked. “Why do you say that?”   
“Because you died four years ago.”   
Evy said nothing. How did he know? She didn’t remember anything about being in heaven with mommy before, but she remembered mommy coming to her room and telling her about it. Evy looked away from Gordon, who waited patiently for a minute before saying anything else. He was sizing Evy up. She was stubborn, and pretended to be brave, but she was just a scared four-year-old. Except she wasn’t. Gordon knew that, whatever this was in front of him, it was not Evelyn Winchester, John Winchester’s long dead daughter. He decided then what he was going to do.   
“So if you died four years ago, how have you come back as a…three-year-old?”   
“I’m four.” Evy said quietly. She decided to lie. Daddy had told her not to say anything to anyone about how she ended up with them. They won’t believe you, and they may try to take you away from me. “And I don’t know what you talking about.”  
“Okay.” Gordon said. “We’ll play this the hard way.” He got up and headed towards the door. “I’ll be back at some point.”   
“You’re leaving me here alone?” Evy asked.   
“Why shouldn’t I?” Gordon asked.   
Evy swallowed hard. “No weason.”   
Gordon laughed and shook his head. He’d have this kid broken in no time. Leave her alone for a few hours, come back, ask her again, then figure out how to kill her based on her answers. Gordon walked upstairs and sat down on the living room couch, still grinning to himself about his clever plan to get rid of Evy. The second the TV popped on, though, his plan went out the door.   
“Local and state authorities are searching for Evelyn Winchester, a four-year-old girl taken from her bedroom last night in Sioux Falls. Evelyn is one inch shy of three feet tall and weighs approximately thirty-eight pounds. She has very long dark brown hair, and was last wearing a pair of pink and white polka dot pajamas. She is believed to be with this man, Gordon Walker. If you see either of these two, please call the number at the bottom of your screen.”   
“Son of a bitch!” Gordon screamed, throwing the remote to the wall and shattering it.   
So Winchester had thrown a curve ball. A major one. That was okay. Gordon still had plenty of time. There was still a few hours, according to his calculations, before they would catch up to him. He just had to speed up his timeline. Gordon turned off the television and started to headed back downstairs. Before he did, he phoned his contact.  
“Why the hell didn’t you tell me the sheriff was going to put out a missing persons report?”   
Back in Jody’s office, the information she was getting was making absolutely no sense. Gordon had been spotted, and Jody had verified all the sightings through surveillance, but they made no sense. He was travelling in circles. Where was he going? What was his plan? And, what worried Jody most of all, Evy had not been seen by any of the people, mostly gas station attendants, who had seen Gordon. Before she could admit to herself what that likely meant, one of her deputies came back into the office from answering a personal call.   
“Everything okay, Kubrick?”   
“Yes, Sheriff. Sorry about that. My mom took a fall last night.” Kubrick said.   
“Really? She okay?”   
“Yeah, she should be fine.” Kubrick said. “Sorry about the interruption.”   
“It’s okay. Can you keep your head in the game? We’ve got a missing kid here.”   
“I’m all yours, Sheriff.” Kubrick said with a smile.  
Jody nodded, turning back to the board she was using to keep track of where Gordon had been spotted. She had just about settled on calling in the FBI when something occurred to her. She didn’t know why, but her new deputy was unsettling to her. She didn’t trust him at all. Finally, Jody decided what to do. She walked over to the deputy in the office she trusted the most.   
“Can you come to my office?”   
Deputy Jennings looked up from the paperwork she was on. “Something wrong?”   
“Yeah, I just want to talk about something personal.” Jody said.   
“Okay.” Deputy Jennings had been in the office longer than anyone else, and she knew from Jody’s tone of voice this was pure business disguised as something else. She walked in with Jody and closed the door. “What’s really going on?”   
Jody turned, her back to her desk. “How do you feel about Kubrick?”   
“Kubrick? The new guy?” Jennings shrugged and said, “He seems okay. Kinda quiet. Why?”   
“I don’t know. I just get a really bad feeling about him.” Jody explained. “Don’t say anything, but pull his cell phone records. I want to know who just called him.”   
Jennings eyes got wide. “You think he had something to do with the Winchester little girl?”   
“I don’t know. But I don’t think that was Kubrick’s mother he was talking to.” Jody said. “If it’s a burner phone he’s using, do a background check. As deep as you can go. I want to know everyone he’s hung out with since elementary school.”   
“You think he was talking to Walker?” Jennings asked. “You think he’s keeping us away from him?”   
“I don’t know. But I intend to find out. Do it as quickly and quietly as you can.” Jody said.   
“You got it, Sheriff.” Jennings replied, walking out to do her duty.   
Jody watched Kubrick from her open office door. “May God have mercy on you if you are keeping that kid from being found. Because John Winchester surely won’t.”   
Gordon made his way back down the stairs. He’d been planning on leaving Evy locked down there in the basement for a few hours, but he had to go straight to his plan B. He unlocked the door and walked down. He was surprised to find Evy still sitting in the chair where he’d left her. Maybe I’ve weakened her more than I thought. Evy looked up and said nothing. Gordon made his way over to the table and opened up the duffle bag, but waited before taking anything out.   
“How did you get back?”   
“I’m not talking to you.” Evy said.   
“You are. Or I’ll make good on what I told you earlier.” Gordon said.   
Evy, tired of being scared of Gordon, stared him down. “I don’t bewieve you.”   
Gordon hated it, but Evy calling his bluff threw him off balance. “What?”   
“I don’t bewieve you. You not gonna hurts my family. If you do, then I got no weason to talk to you.”   
He hated admitting this even more. “I’m impressed. How’d you work that out?”   
“I ‘on’t know. I just did.”   
Gordon nodded. “M’kay. I’ll show you what I will do, though.” Gordon reached in and pulled out something that made Evy gasp.   
“Barney! What are you doing with him?” Evy asked, her eyes filling with tears and her voice shaking.   
“This.” Without so much as blinking, Gordon took the worn unicorn and tore him in half.  
“Barney!” Evy screamed. “Stop! Leave him alone!”  
“Tell me how you got back here, or I do it again.”   
“Leave him alone, please.” Evy begged. “Don’t huwt him.”   
“Then talk to me.” Gordon said again.  
When Evy said nothing, Gordon ripped the horn off Barney’s head, making Evy wail in despair and look away. She felt herself being lifted up from the chair, and realized Gordon was picking her up. She feebly tried to fight him, but her effort was so weak that Gordon didn’t even try to subdue her. He simply placed her on the table, in the middle of the mess that used to be Barney. Evy hugged her knees and tried to cry, but Gordon grabbed her face and held it tight in his hands.   
“This will keep going if you don’t talk to me.” Gordon said. “There’s something else you have to see.”   
Gordon let go of Evy’s face and grabbed something else out of his duffel bag. What he did this time broke Evy. He had a smaller black bag this time, the type that Sam took with him when he took her grocery shopping. Gordon upturned the bag, and out onto the table spilled the stems and tops of three dozen fully formed pink roses.   
“My mommy’s woses.” Evy cried. “I worked hard on dem.”   
“I don’t care.” Gordon said cruelly. “Look at me.”   
Evy didn’t listen, and she squealed when Gordon pinched the cartilage of her ear and forced her to look at him.  
“I’m leaving for two hours. You are not to get off this table. When I come back, you will tell me how you got back and you will tell me the truth. Or I promise you, what I told you would happen to your family will not just be a bluff. Do you understand me?”   
“I understand.” Evy somehow got out through tears.  
“Alright. Let me give you some advice, kid. Don’t be stupid here. Just tell me the truth and everything’ll be okay.”   
Gordon let Evy’s ear go, leaving her in the middle of the table with the discarded remnants of Barney and her flower garden. Evy grabbed Barney’s head and his horn, trying in vain to stick it back for him. When she couldn’t do it, Evy threw the horn on the floor in frustration. Never before had she felt so weak, so small, so hopeless. And she was all alone. There was no Daddy, no Bobby, no Sam or Dean to save her this time.   
“Somebody help me.”   
Jody just couldn’t figure it out. Gordon had been seen leaving Sioux Falls, then in Monroe, then in Turkey Ridge, then in Irene, then in Centerville. He was travelling all over the map. There was just no way to tell where he was going next. That’s exactly the point, Jody thought. Before she could stew on it any longer, though, Deputy Jennings came back into the room.   
“Sheriff? You need to see this.”   
“What is it?” Jody asked.   
Jennings shut the door behind her. “So, I didn’t do the background check on Kubrick yet. But I did find this.” She handed Jody a single piece of paper; it was a credit card receipt. “That number that called Kubrick? It was a burner. But, I called the phone company. I told them I was investigating the disappearance of a missing child, and that number was suspected to be the person who took her.”   
“Good thinking!” Jody said sincerely. “What’d you find out?”   
“Well, I lucked out. The operator I got was a mom whose kid went missing for a few days a couple years ago. She could lose her job if they find out she did this, so I had to promise we’d hire her as a secretary or something….”   
“We’ll deal with that if it comes to it. What’d you find out?” Jody asked.  
“She gave me the store the phone was purchased from, the exact time, and even the transaction number. I went to the store, looked at their surveillance, and I got this.” Jennings gave another paper to Jody. It was a somewhat grainy, but decipherable photo of Gordon. “The phone was purchased with a credit card under the name of Dexter Wiley. A known alias of…”   
“Gordon Walker.” Jody said. “This is fantastic, Jennings. And you’re sure this is the number that called Kubrick earlier?”   
“That’s the only number that phone’s ever called.”   
“Good lead. Great lead. Come on, let’s go deal with this scumbag.” Jody said. She went to the door of the office, opened it, and called to Kubrick. “Kubrick, can you come in here for a minute?”   
“Sure, sheriff.” Kubrick said. He walked in, supposedly oblivious to anything out of the ordinary. “What’s going on?”   
“Sit down, Kubrick. Jennings, man the door.”   
“Yes, ma’am.” Jennings said, quickly closing the door behind her.   
“Uh, sheriff…” Kubrick said, now nervous.   
“Okay, Kubrick. I’m only gonna ask this once. I know that call wasn’t from your mother. Tell me who it was.”   
“Why should I do that, sheriff?” Kubrick asked. “It’s my personal life…”   
“Kubrick, at the very minimum right now, you’re fired for lying to me. Now tell me, who was that on the phone?” Jody asked.  
Kubrick sighed, and pretended to look ashamed. “It was my bookie…”   
Jody actually laughed. “Nice try.” She said. “Very nice try, actually. Playing my sympathy card. Problem with that is this. I know that kid. I love that kid. Which is why me and Jennings did our homework. We traced that number. And we got this” Jody handed Kubrick the surveillance picture of Gordon buying the phone and saw him pale, “from the store where it was bought. Now, I’ll give you one chance. Tell me where Evelyn Winchester is.”   
“Why should I?”   
“Because if you don’t tell me, then I’ll invite John Winchester, Bobby Singer, and Dean Winchester in this office to ask you themselves.” Jody said.   
The bluff worked. Jody had figured that if Kubrick was working with Gordon, he knew the truth about hunting, which meant that he knew the reputations of John, Bobby, and Dean. Jennings looked puzzled, but Jody held her gaze on Kubrick.   
“What’s it gonna be, Kubrick? Deal with me, deal with Gordon, or deal with the Winchesters?”   
Kubrick scowled and looked away. “Fine.”   
“What’s that?” Jody asked.  
“I said fine.” Kubrick said, looking to Jody. “I’ll tell you where they are.”   
“So do it.” Jody said. “Where are they?”   
“They’re at my house.” Kubrick answered with a smirk. “In Vermillion.”   
Jody pulled a notepad from her desk and a pencil, then slapped it into Kubrick’s hand. “Address. Now. And if it’s wrong, I’ll be letting Dean Winchester accidentally get into your jail cell.” Kubrick scowled again, scribbled the address, threw it at Jody, and stood up.  
“Where are you going?” Jody asked.   
“I was leaving…” Kubrick said.   
“You’re kidding, right?” Jody said. “You’re under arrest. Accessory to kidnapping. Deputy Jennings, would you do the honors, please?”   
“Happy to, Sheriff.”   
As Jennings was leading Kubrick out the door, Jody phoned Bobby and told him to be ready to go in ten minutes. As she got behind the wheel to go to Bobby’s house, Jody put the siren on top of the car and whispered,  
“We’re coming for you, baby. Just hang on.”


	13. Chapter 13

We found Evy.  
The words had let some of the air back into John’s chest, but until he was finally holding Evy, he didn’t think he’d really be able to breathe. Jody had called the local Vermillion police, and they were on the way to the house, but John’s thoughts were on Evy. He, Bobby, Sam, and Dean followed behind Jody, who broke the speed limit getting to the address that the deputy had given her. John had wanted to deal with Kubrick before leaving, but Bobby had convinced him to get to Evy first.   
“That scumbag’ll pay. Let’s go.”  
Finally, blessedly, they pulled up to the house, but John’s heart sank even further. The sight of police cars, news vans, and an ambulance didn’t make him feel any better. John parked the car, got out and started to run inside, but was stopped by Jody.   
“Jody, come on, don’t keep me from her…”   
“John, wait. Listen to me.” Jody said firmly.   
The tone of her voice stopped John in his tracks. “Jody, no, please don’t tell me…”   
“She’s fine, John, just listen to me.” Jody said. “In fact, all of you need to listen to me.”   
“Then what is it?”   
Jody swallowed. “She’s down in the basement. She seems to be in shock. The paramedic tried to take a look at her, but she won’t let anyone touch her. I’m just saying that you need to go slow. I know you’re ready to see her, but don’t rush it. We need your help to get her looked at.”   
“Is she hurt?” Bobby asked.  
“We can’t tell for sure. But she seems to be okay.”   
“Jody, please…” John begged, and Jody moved out of the way to let John through.   
John knew that Sam, Dean, and Bobby were following him, but he didn’t care. After over thirty hours of wanting nothing more than to see Evy, suddenly a small part of him was wishing he could hold it off. John climbed down the steps first, and what he found made him sick to his stomach. The basement was cold and damp, and a few hours down her was enough to make anyone sick. There was a small foldable metal chair and a table in the room. On top of the table sat what looked like a shredded pillow and a pile of leaves. On closer examination, John realized it was what was left of Barney, and the pile of leaves was actually stems. The bastard cut up the damn unicorn and her flowers. I will kill this son of a bitch. Evy was still sitting in the middle of the table, looking down at the mess on the table. John heard Bobby asking where Gordon was, but surprisingly he didn’t care. John walked slowly to the table, reached out and touched Evy’s shoulder gently. She flinched as if he’d hit her, and John had to swallow his rage again when he saw a handprint on the side of her face.   
“Are you okay?” John asked. She said nothing, and John was scared; Jody’s assessment of shock seemed fair. “Little one, we need you to come with us. We’re here to take you home.”   
Evy’s eyes filled with tears, but they didn’t fall.   
“It’s okay. You’re safe now, baby.” John said. “Do you want me to hold you?”   
Evy, who would normally talk to anything that would move as long as it would listen, just sat there staring at John with the emptiest eyes he’d seen in a very long time. What the hell did Gordon do to you? John thought to himself. He tried again to reach Evy.   
“Little one, I promise, we’re here to get you.” John cautiously reached up and pushed some hair out of her face. Evy pulled back from him a little, but didn’t flinch this time. “I’m gonna pick you up and take you to get looked at by the doctor, okay?”   
Even more tears came, and Evy backed away slowly.   
“Hey. Look at me.” John said firmly. “I’ll be right there the entire time. I will not let anything happen to you.”  
Evy seemed to think it over, then reached over for her father.   
“That’s it. Come on.”   
John picked up the still shaking Evy and held her tight against him. Evy didn’t pull away from him, but she didn’t reach her arms around his neck like she did every other time he picked her up either. Sam, Dean, and Bobby all hugged her too, but Evy wouldn’t let John put her down. They walked out after a few minutes, waiting on Jody to clear the news reporters out from the front of the house. She came down and told them that Gordon had heard them coming and ran. He’d ended up in a high speed chase with the cops and crashed his car into a light pole at over ninety miles an hour. No one was sad to hear that he died on impact. Dean, for a reason he refused to reveal to anyone, rode back to Sioux Falls Two hours after, Evy had been checked over by a doctor, but still hadn’t said a word to anyone. Sam, who had packed clothes for Evy in the car, helped her change and was holding her in his lap when the doctor came back to the room.   
“Mr. Winchester, can I speak to you in the hallway, please?”   
“Doctor, they’re all gonna hear this anyway.” John said. “Just say whatever you need to say.”   
“Very well.” The doctor opened a file and explained, “Physically, she seems okay. But she’s obviously in shock. She wouldn’t say a word to me while I was examining her.”   
“Will that change?” John asked. “She’s normally very chatty.”   
“I think you should just give it a few days. Just keep talking to her. Let her know that she’s safe, that you’re here for her.”  
“What if that doesn’t work?” Sam asked. He felt Evy move in his lap, but she said nothing. “This just isn’t like her.”   
“Then I think you should consider taking her to see a counselor. But give it a few days first.” The doctor said. “I’ve dealt with quite a few traumatized children. Counseling has its part, but a supportive family works miracles. Just be very, very patient with her. Don’t try to talk, or that could make her withdraw even more. Talk to her like normal, and hopefully she’ll start doing the same.”   
“Thanks, Doc.” John said. “Is she okay to go home now?”   
“Yeah, she’s okay.” The doctor said. “I would get her something to eat on the way home. I heard her stomach rumble a couple of times while I was examining her.”   
“We will.”   
The family left, and it was a long ride home. Evy sat in the backseat, holding on to a blanket with one arm and sucking her thumb with the other. She pretended to be asleep, but she was really thinking. She knew Daddy wanted her to talk, but she couldn’t. Her feelings were too jumbled up inside for her to make sense of them. She’d always thought that no matter what, Daddy and Sammy and Deanie and uncle Bobby would keep her safe. But Gordon had gotten her anyway. And if that was true, then maybe what he’d said about monsters being real and Deanie and uncle Bobby fighting them were true. And worst of all, maybe what he’d said about her not belonging with them was true too.   
Evy did fall asleep, but she woke up with a nightmare. In her nightmare, she was playing out in the backyard with Barney, who’d somehow come alive, and suddenly Gordon came up behind them and started ripping Barney apart in front of her. While she was crying over Barney’s remains, she saw her mother standing over the flowerbed Evy had planted for her. The flowers were ripped and torn. Missy just shook her head and turned away. Evy tried to scream at her to come back, that she was sorry, but no sound would come out. When she felt John trying to calm her down by pulling her in for a hug, what she normally wanted when she had a bad dream, his good intentions only earned him a push off of her and a struggling Evy. Everyone could only watch helplessly as Evy let a few tears trickle down her face. She let Sam hold her hand, but any more contact than that was met with a shake of the head and her withdrawing further into herself.   
When they finally made it back to their house, John checked the clock and couldn’t believe it. It wasn’t even noon yet. It had only been a little over a day and a half since Evy had gone missing, and it felt like a week. John had a fleeting thought wondering how parents dealt with it when their children were missing for days, weeks, or years, when he felt a hand grab his. When he looked over, Evy was holding her arms out to him, pleading with him to pick her up.  
“Do you want me to hold you?”   
Evy nodded.  
John wanted to make her ask him to hold her, anything to make her talk and get out of this slump. But one look in Evy’s eyes and John couldn’t be the least bit stern with her. She was hurting, in pain that he couldn’t understand, and forcing her to talk could be disastrous. John reached over, unbuckled her, and Evy climbed out of her seat and into John’s lap.   
“I’m so happy you’re back home.” John said.   
Evy squeezed John’s neck but again said nothing.   
“Come on, let’s go inside.”   
John carried her into the house and walked to the living room couch. Bobby and Sam were putting their jackets away, and seemed surprised when John walked in carrying the still clearly exhausted Evy. Sam helped John pull off his jacket, then all sat down, wondering the same thing-how to get Evy to talk. Evy knew what they all wanted, but she just couldn’t do it yet. Evy turned around so she was sitting in John’s lap facing the front door rather than laying with her head on his shoulder. She was sleepy but didn’t want to go to sleep. She was afraid of another bad dream. The front door opened, and in stepped Dean, holding one hand behind his back and wearing a broad grin.   
“Dean, what are you up to?” John asked.  
“I’ve got something for you, kiddo. You ready?”   
Evy, intrigued at what could have Dean so happy, nodded and waited. Dean pulled his arm out from behind his back, and Evy gasped. Dean handed her an almost good as new Barney. She took him gingerly, as if she was afraid to break him. Suddenly, all the hurt, the sadness, the pain she felt in her heart started to go away. If Dean cared enough about her to put this much work into making her happy, then maybe Gordon had been wrong. She felt a smile start to creep onto her face, and saw that the rest of her family looked as happy as she did. She started to thank Dean for saving Barney, but another thought crossed her mind. If Dean had saved Barney, then maybe, just maybe…  
Evy jumped down from the couch and ran out to the backyard. Everyone followed, wondering where she was headed. But Evy had stopped dead at the bottom staircase. She was staring out into the yard, and when John realized what she was staring at, his heart dropped. She was looking at the flowerbed. Evy walked over and just stood there in the middle of the potting soil. She thought about the day that she and Sammy had started the flower bed.  
“Las’ one, Sammy!”   
“Okay, Cricket. Put it in.” Sam said.   
Evy very carefully placed the last plant into the hole that Sam had dug, then covered it up with the dirt. “We did it!”   
“Yeah, we did. Good job, Cricket. I’m proud of you.” Sam said.   
“You think mommy’ll wike it?” Evy asked.  
“I think she already loves it.” Sam said. “Because you made it for her.”   
“I hope so. I misses her. I want to do somefin’ to make her happy.”   
“She is, baby.” Sam said, giving her a hug and a kiss. “She is.”   
Evy suddenly hit her knees. She started grabbing fistfuls of potting soil and flinging it as hard as she could. She knew exactly how she felt now. The sadness, the hurt, the fear all turned to anger. Anger that boiled in her stomach and threatened to spill over. At four years old, she didn’t know what to call it, but what she felt was rage. Rage at Gordon for taking her, rage at her family for not protecting her, but most importantly, rage at herself for not trying harder to fight Gordon. Suddenly Evy was lifted off her feet and into her father’s arms, but this time she wasn’t silent. Her whole body shook with pained sobs.  
“He killed mommy’s fowers, Daddy.” Evy said, every word broken by tears.   
“I know, little one.” John said. “I know you worked so hard on it. I’m so sorry.”   
“I don’t care about that!” Evy insisted. “I did it for her, now is all gone.”  
“Cricket…” Sam said from beside them, tears coming down his own face.   
“He was right.” Evy said.  
Even though he didn’t quite know what she was talking about, John asked, “Who was right?”   
“Gordon. He said I shouldn’t be here. That I shouldn’t have come back, I should have stayed up in heaven wif mommy…”   
“Evelyn Winchester, stop right now.” John said, being as stern as he could without being cruel. “Look at me.”   
Evy lifted her head slightly to find all of her family looking at her. John and Sam were both crying, Dean still stood there holding Barney, and Bobby just looked sad. Sam reached over and wiped her face for her, and Evy held his hand to her cheek.   
“I don’t ever want to hear you talking about yourself like that again. Do you understand me?”   
“It’s true, though, Daddy…” Evy tried.  
“NO!” John insisted, barely avoiding shouting at her. Evy flinched, and John softened his voice. “No. Nothing Gordon told you was true. We were so sad without you. If you hadn’t come down here to us, none of us would be as happy as we are right now. Little one, you’re the reason I still get up in the morning. You saved me from a broken heart.”   
“I saved you?” Evy asked, the very thought helping to stem the tears that were still falling.  
“You did. You saved your ol’ daddy. And I’m thankful that you came back here every single minute of every day. And I’m not the only one. Right guys?” John asked, turning a little so Evy could face Sam, Dean, and Bobby.  
“You bet that’s right, kiddo. We don’t know what we’d do without you.”   
“Cricket, we love you so much.”  
“You’re my best girl, Baitfish.”   
There was another person there, though no one could see her. Once she knew Evy was safe and protected, she blew her a kiss. “I love you, Kitten.”   
Evy had finally, blessedly, stopped crying. She turned her red, puffy eyes to the flower bed and her mouth fell open. In the corner was one perfect, fully formed pink rose. Evy watched it for a minute, before turning to John again.   
“Daddy? I’m hungwy. Can we eat now?”   
“What have you had to eat?” John asked.   
“Nuffin. Jus’ a gwanola bar.” Evy said.   
John took a deep breath, his own rage making it hard for him to keep a level head.   
“Come on, Baitfish. What do you want for lunch?”   
“Pancakes.” Evy said with a smile.   
“For lunch?” Sam asked.  
“It not wunch when I din’t eat bweakfast first.” Evy explained.  
John laughed, a genuine, happy laugh, which felt strange after two days of panic and despair looking for Evy. “Can’t argue with that. Come on, let’s go eat.”


	14. Chapter 14

It had been one of the longest weeks that any of them could remember. Evy had gone missing on Sunday and come home Monday afternoon. Sam took the rest of the week off, which wasn’t too difficult with the fact that Evy’s abduction had gotten nationwide coverage. John went to check on things at the garage, and several of his semi-regular customers asked him how Evy was doing. Even though Dean and Bobby had stayed out of the spotlight, they agreed not to take any hunts until the attention died down. Evy overheard Sam talking about how Gordon had come into her room from under her bed, and from that point forward refused to sleep by herself and refused to sleep or play in her room. She took naps on the couch and slept with John or Sam for the first three days. Finally, after days of gentle prodding from everyone, Evy told them,   
“Will you guys wisten to me in the wiving room? I’m weady to tell you about what happened.”   
“Are you sure, Cricket?” Sam asked. “You don’t have to.”   
“No, I’s weady. I want you to know.”   
“Alright, little one. We’ll all sit in the living room with you after dinner. Okay?” John said.   
“’Kay, tank you, Daddy.” Evy said.  
She couldn’t eat very much because she was nervous, so John decided to wrap up her sandwich in case she was hungry again after telling the story. Once they were back in the living room, Evy climbed into John’s lap and started to change her mind. John could see her wavering and pulled her close to him.  
“You don’t have to do this. Gordon’s gone, he can’t hurt you anymore. But I do think it will help you to talk about it.”  
“It’s hard.” Evy said. “It still scares me.”   
“I know. Just take your time. No one’s in a hurry; we’re all here for you. And if you want to stop and keep going later, we can do that too. Okay?”   
“Okay.” Evy said quietly.   
“Why don’t you start at the beginning?” John suggested. “Did you feel Gordon taking you out of your room?”   
“No. I woked up in his car. I thought it was you or Deanie dwiving me somewhere at first. But I twied to push myself up and I couldn’t.”   
“Why not?” Sam asked. Evy hadn’t said anything about hurting her arm.  
“He tied me up. My hands and my feet.”  
Evy felt John squeeze her. She thought he was giving her a hug, so she hugged him back. In reality, John was trying to restrain himself. Evy hadn’t told anyone that Gordon had tied her up, and the thought of her sitting in that car, scared and alone and unable to move, was too much for him to handle. John didn’t say anything, just hugged Evy and waited on her to keep talking.  
“I asked him where you were, and why he was taking me. He got real mad at me and then when I for you, he hit me.”   
“Oh, Cricket…” Sam said. He reached over and lightly stroked Evy’s cheek, which even days later held a slight bruise from Gordon’s slap.   
“Don’t touch it, pease.” Evy said quietly, taking Sam’s hand and pulling it away from her face. Sam quietly whispered ‘sorry’, and Evy continued. “He kept driving all day, ‘till it started getting dark again. I told him I had to go potty. He didn’t want to stop, but I told him if he didn’t I would pee in the car.”   
Every adult in the room fought a snicker. Evy’s stubbornness, as Bobby had said once, put John’s to shame.   
“He pulled over and he let me out, but he gwabbed my shoulder weal hard and held on. I told him I wouldn’t go with him watching me, and he hitted me again.” Evy said.  
“Hit you where?” Sam asked.   
“He ‘watted the back of my leg.”   
“Okay. What happened next?” John asked, not wanting her to dwell on it.  
“He told me to stop having an attitude wif ‘im. That he’d let me wide in the car wifout being tied up, but if I didn’t stop he’d…”   
“He’d what?” John asked when Evy clammed up again.   
“He said he’d kill all of you.”   
“Like to see that asshole try…” Dean muttered under his breath.  
But he didn’t mutter quietly enough; Evy heard him and panicked, burrowing herself further into John and starting to cry. “You said he was gone!”  
“Dean!” Sam mildly scolded, at the same time Bobby reached over and used his cap to slap the back of Dean’s head. “Idjit.”   
“Shhh. Little one, he is gone. Shh, it’s okay.” John comforted Evy as he glared at Dean. She cried a little more, before John asked, “Do you want to stop? It’s getting close to your bedtime, anyway.”   
“No. I’s amost done.” Evy said, wiping her eyes. “He kept dwiving all day and we stopped at this house. The house you found us at. He kept trying to get me to talk to him about how I got here, and I wouldn’t tell him anything. He left me alone for a few minutes, then came back downstairs. He wipped up Barney and he frew mommy’s fowers on the table to try and make me cry. It worked.”   
“Oh, Cricket.” Sam said. “I’m so sorry, baby.”   
“Is there anything else we need to know, little one? Did Gordon hurt you any more than you told us about?” John asked.   
“No. He set me on the table and left me there. I didn’t see him again, or anybody until you came and picked me up.”   
“Okay, little one.” John said. “Thank you for telling us.”   
“Daddy? Can I ask you somefing? Somefing about what Gordon said to me?”   
“I already told you…” John started to say.  
“Not about mommy. Somefing else.”   
“Okay. What?” John asked.  
Evy sat up, wiping her eyes and looking around. “Unca Baby, Deanie, this for you too.”   
“Okay.” Dean said. “What’s up, kiddo?”   
“Gordon told me monsters were real. That you and unca Baby go and fight them when you’re gone. I told him he was lying, that you two go and help people that nobody else can help. Was he right? Or am I?”  
The room stood still, much the same way it had when they’d discovered Evy missing. She waited for their answer, and everyone wondered what John would say. In a move that would stun the other three adults in the room for the rest of their lives, John said,   
“Listen to me. You were right. There are bad people in the world, and Gordon’s one of them. But he was just trying to scare you. There’s no such thing as monsters.”  
“Weally? You pwomise? No monsters?”   
“No monsters.” John promised.  
“Unca Baby? Deanie? Sammy? No monsters?”   
“No monsters.” Everyone agreed.  
Evy relaxed and smiled. “’Kay. That’s it. I feels better now.”   
“Good.” John said. “Good. I want to talk to you about something now.”   
“What is it?”   
John sighed; he knew this wasn’t going to go over well with Evy. “I want you to try sleeping in your room tonight.”   
Evy shook her head firmly. “No.”   
“It’s not a request.” John said just as firmly. “You’re sleeping in your bed tonight.”   
“No!” Evy cried. “Daddy, I can’t seep in dere. Pease don’t make me.”   
“What are you afraid of? You haven’t slept in there. How do you know you can’t?”   
“Gordon got in there from under my bed. If he can, somebody else can too.” Evy said.  
“No one’s getting in there, Baitfish. I reinforced the floor under your bed. That means if they so much as try, they can’t do it without waking up the whole neighborhood.” Bobby explained.  
“But…”   
“No buts.” John said. He hated himself at the moment. He knew she was scared, and he understood why, but if he didn’t make her start sleeping in her own room, she’d never start feeling better. “I’ll stay with you if you want, but you have to start sleeping in your room.”   
Evy gave up her argument and slumped over in defeat. She wiped her eyes, trying to hide the tears dripping out. John felt them hit his hand and he nearly cracked. What was the harm in her sleeping with him a few more nights? But he knew well that a few more nights could turn into a few more weeks. Before he could tell her that it was time to start getting ready for bed, Sam pulled him and Dean into the hallway with a solution. It was so obvious, so plain a fix to Evy’s fear of sleeping in her own room that John felt dumb for not thinking of it before.   
“Cricket, listen. We have an idea. What do you think about switching rooms with me and Dean? Would that help you sleep better?”   
“Weally? But your woom’s so much bigger than mine.” Evy said.   
“And you spend a lot more time in your room than we do.” Sam argued.   
“Kiddo, we don’t care about that. If you need to move so you can sleep better, we’ll help you move.”   
Evy thought hard about it. Sam and Dean’s room was on the second floor, so it would be a lot harder for anyone to get in that wasn’t supposed to be there. Daddy would be farther away, but uncle Bobby slept on the second floor too. Every time she thought about going near her room, her heart started beating fast. But sleeping with Sam in his room made her feel calm and safe. Maybe it was worth a try.   
“Daddy, is it okay with you?”   
“If it’ll make you feel safer, it is.” John said.   
“I want to do it.” Evy said.   
“Okay. You sleep in our room tonight, and if you sleep better than you have been, we’ll start helping you move your stuff tomorrow.” Sam said.   
“’Kay. Tank you, Sammy. Tank you, Deanie.”   
When Evy yawned, John patted her leg and said, “Come on. Time to get ready for bed.”   
“Daddy? Will you stay in there wif me? ‘Till I go to seep?”   
“I’ll stay anytime you want.” John promised. “Why don’t you go pick out your pajamas?”   
Evy got up and, with Sam’s help, picked out her pajamas, took a bath, and came back out. John tucked her in, then came back downstairs to a room full of a stunned Sam, Dean, and Bobby. He sat down and started to gather his thoughts.   
“Boys, I’m sorry.”   
“Sorry for what, Dad?” Dean asked.  
“That I took your childhoods. That I didn’t let you believe there was no such thing as monsters. That I didn’t do whatever I could to make you feel safe. I’m just…taking care of your sister again, it’s showing me everything I could have had with the two of you if I had just looked past my own hurt for five seconds and focused on you two. I’m sorry.”  
“It’s okay, Dad. I wouldn’t change my life for anything. Yeah, it was hard at times, but I love what I do.” Dean said.   
John had expected Dean to be the forgiving one, so he responded only with a smile and a nod. It was Sam that worried him. He and Sam had, in the years that John hunted, been far apart both physically and emotionally. They were two different people, and John had never appreciated that until after Sam had grown up and left the house. He looked to Sam, who surprised John by smiling at him.   
“Sam?”   
“I used to hate you for it.” Sam said. “I used to hate the fact that you put hunting before me and Evy and Dean. I just couldn’t understand why you’d rather be out there hunting all the bad and killing everything evil when you had so much good under your nose. But I wouldn’t change it either.”   
“What?”   
“I wouldn’t change it either. If you had done it, if you had lived that normal life with us, you would have been miserable. Things may have even been worse between us than they were. And you never would have met Missy, and we wouldn’t have Evy. So yeah, if I had to go through all of it again, I would too. So let’s all work together and give her what we couldn’t have.” Sam said.   
“Sounds good, son.” An emotional John answered. “Sounds good.”   
“I’m going to get ready for bed. I guess I’ll sleep on the couch tonight.”   
“I’ll make a pallet and sleep in here.” Dean said.   
“Good plan. Goodnight, boys.”   
“Night, Dad.”   
John walked upstairs to check on Evy, who he was relieved to find cuddling Barney and sleeping with a smile on her face for the first time in days. He pulled her blanket up a little and covered her feet. Evy responded by whining slightly and sticking her feet right back out. John laughed, leaned over, and kissed her cheek.  
“Daddy’s right here, little one. I’ll keep you safe. I love you so much. Good night.”


	15. Chapter 15

“I’m home!” John shouted from the doorway.  
“Daddy, shhhh!”   
John stopped and looked around, then found Evy crouching under the stairs. She was waving to him to join her, with a finger in front of her mouth. He could hear Dean calling from the other side of the house, things like “Where’s Evy?” and “I’m gonna get you!”. John made himself as small as he could, and crawled in after Evy.  
“What are you doing?” he asked.  
“Daddy, shhh! You got be quiet!”   
“Why do I need to be quiet?” John whispered.  
“Deanie and me paying hide and seek. He catch me, he get to tickle me. You got to be super quiet.”   
“Oh. Okay. I’ll leave you to it then.” John said. “Can I have a kiss first?”   
“I blow you kiss. Don’t want Deanie to hear me.”   
“Deal.” John said. Evy quickly blew him a kiss and John stood up. He fought a laugh as he quickly decided what to do. “Dean, she’s in here!”   
“Daddy, no!” Evy said as she quickly scrambled out from under the stairs.  
John laughed as he watched Evy flee to the living room, only to be bested by Dean and caught before she reached the couch.   
“I got you!” Dean cheered.   
“No….no fair! Daddy…daddy gived me away!” Evy said, giggling as she squirmed and tried to get out of Dean’s travelling fingers.   
“Well, I guess we’ll need a rematch then, huh?” Dean asked.  
“Yes, pease.” Evy said, panting as she calmed down from Dean’s tickle attack.   
“Hey, kiddo, I’ve got another idea.” Dean said. “Come here.”   
John watched as Evy climbed into Dean’s lap and leaned over so he could whisper in her ear. How the hell do you still trust him?, John thought. Dean wrapped an arm around Evy, looked at John, winked, and flexed his fingers. John nodded, understanding Dean’s plan and waiting. While the two of them worked out their devious little scheme, John watched Evy and thought about how far she’d come since Gordon had taken her just under a month earlier. She still had the occasional bad dream, but slept much easier in Sam and Dean’s old room. She laughed and played almost as much as she had before. Evy giggled, grinned, and after a minute or two, sat up and nodded. She climbed off Dean’s lap and walked back over to John, biting her bottom lip and keeping her hands clasped behind her back as she barely contained her grin.  
“Daddy?”   
“Yes?” John asked.   
“Can I has a daddy bear hug pease?”   
Oh, that’s low, Dean. That’s low. “Sure.”  
He reached down and started to pick her up, but the second he was down to her eye level she sprung her trap. Evy started with her little fingers running down John’s neck, then moved over to his chin. John at first pretended to laugh, then found himself really laughing as he grabbed Evy into the hug she’d asked for in the first place.   
“I love you, little one.”   
“Love you too, Daddy.” Evy said with a kiss to the cheek. “I’s still mad you gived me away, though. Dat was mean.”   
“Can I make it up to you with some cookies?”   
“Yes, sir!” Evy said emphatically.  
“Okay. Come on, let’s go.”   
“Cricket, I’m home!”   
Evy, who was just out of Sam’s eyesight, looked at John and grinned. John nodded, and Evy walked into the hallway to meet Sam at the door. She had her hands clasped behind her back and was biting her bottom lip.   
“Sammy? Can I has a hug please?”


	16. Chapter 16

Evy climbed out of bed and down the hall towards the bathroom. She went, washed her hands and came downstairs. She knew Daddy was already gone; he had come inside to kiss her goodbye before he went to work. Evy heard Sam walking around downstairs, so she carefully walked down the stairs and over to the kitchen.   
“Hi, Sammy.”   
“Morning, Cricket. How’d you sleep?” Sam asked as he picked her up and hugged her.   
“Okay.” Evy said with a yawn. “Daddy waked me up early.”  
“Why’d he do that?”   
“It’s okay, it was accident.” Evy said. “Do you gotta go to work?”   
“I’m going in late today. Around lunchtime. Why?”   
“I just wonnered if you’d make me beakfast.” Evy said with a smile.  
“I think we can make that happen. What do you want?”   
“Eggs, pease.” Evy answered, walking to the table to watch him cook. “I had a funny dream last night.”   
“Oh, yeah? Tell me about it.” Sam said. By the time Sam plated Evy’s scrambled eggs, he was laughing. “Barney was talking to an elephant?”   
“Yeah.” Evy said. “Tank you for beakfast, Sammy.”   
“You’re welcome, baby.” Sam said. “Listen, I need to talk to you about something.”  
“What is it?” Evy asked as she took a mouthful of eggs.  
“Dean and uncle Bobby came home last night.”  
Evy grinned. “Weally? Yay! Deanie pwomised we’d go…”   
“Listen, that’s what I wanted to talk to you about.” Sam said. “I know that Dean promised he’d take you fishing when he got back. But I want you to give him a few days before you ask him to go.”   
“Why? Is Deanie okay?” Evy asked. “Is he sick?”   
“No, baby. He’s not sick. It’s just that…the job that he and uncle Bobby just got back from? It didn’t go so well, and Dean’s not in a very good mood right now. He needs some time to rest. Does that make sense?” Sam asked.  
“I guess.” Evy said. “Is he hurt?”   
“No. He just…” Sam sighed, trying desperately to come up with a way to explain it to Evy that wouldn’t scare her. “Do you remember the morning that you came back here to us?”   
“Yeah.”   
“Do you remember how you felt when you remembered that you wouldn’t see mommy again?” Sam asked. When Evy nodded slowly, Sam felt guilty; he didn’t want to bring a bad memory up for her, but he had to explain. “It hurt in here,” Sam said, pointing to Evy’s heart, “but you weren’t really hurt or sick?”   
“I ‘member.” Evy said.  
“That’s kinda how Dean feels right now.” Sam explained.   
“He’s sad?” Evy asked.  
“Yeah.” Sam said. “He is really sad right now. So just give him a little time to feel better before you ask him about going fishing. Okay?”   
“Okay, Sammy. I will.” Evy said.   
“Are you okay? You sound upset.”   
“I’m just sad that Deanie’s sad.” Evy said. “Can I do anything for him?”   
“That’s sweet of you to ask, baby, but Dean just needs some time, okay? So after I go to work, if uncle Bobby isn’t up yet, I want you to play real quietly in either your room or watch TV in the living room. Don’t wake either of them up unless it’s an emergency. Okay?”   
“I promise.” Evy said.   
After Sam left, Evy followed Sam’s wishes and went to her room to play. She stayed as quiet as she could, but it was hard. After a while, she went to the bathroom, and when she came back out, she stumbled into Dean.  
“Hi, Deanie!” Evy said with a smile.   
“I got to go to the bathroom. Move.”   
Evy moved over, stung by Dean not being happy to see her.   
“Hey, Baitfish.”   
Evy turned around and found Bobby standing in the door of his room. “Hey, uncle Baby.”   
“Where’s my hug?”   
Evy, happy that Bobby wasn’t in the same foul mood that Dean was, ran to him and wrapped her arms around her uncle’s waist. “I’m glad you back, uncle Baby.”   
“I’m glad we’re back too. Listen, about Dean…”   
“Sammy already talked to me.” Evy said. “I spent the day playing in my room real quiet. Can I go play outside now?”   
“Sure. I’ve got some car work to do, I’ll go out there with you.”   
“Can I see if Dean’ll come play with me?” Evy asked.  
Bobby seemed nervous, but answered, “You can ask. But don’t get upset if he says no, okay?”   
“Okay, I won’t.” Dean came out just then and headed straight back towards his room. “Deanie? Will you come outside and play with me, pease?”  
“No.”  
The answer was swift, direct, and precise. Dean didn’t even look at Evy as he opened his and Sam’s bedroom door again and walked inside, slammed the door, and Evy jumped. Now she was scared. She was used to all hugs, kisses, and tickles from Dean. Not the cold shoulder. She wondered if she should have asked if he wanted a hug first. Bobby noticed Evy shaking and suggested, hoping to distract her,  
“Hey, Baitfish, why don’t we head on outside?”   
“Is he mad at me?” Evy asked, not turning from the door.  
No such luck, I guess. “No, he’s not mad at you. Dean just needs a little time to get back to his old self. He’ll come around.”   
“Okay.” Evy said, though she still sounded uncertain. “Uncle Baby, I’m gonna go back in my room now.”  
“You don’t have to. You been in there all day…”   
“I know. But I want to make something for Deanie so he not so sad anymore.” Evy said.   
Bobby felt his heartstrings pull. How did he explain to Evy that what was wrong with Dean couldn’t just be fixed with a drawn picture? How did he make her understand? Sorry, Baitfish, but no matter what you do, Dean’s gonna feel like shit. But the hopeful look in Evy’s eye was too much for Bobby to crush.   
“Tell you what, Baitfish. You come outside and play. Let Dean get some more rest. If he’s still asleep later, I’ll wake him up and you can spend some time with him.”   
“Please? I want to do something. Deanie always makes me feel better when I’m sad.” Evy begged.   
Bobby sighed. “Okay, Baitfish. You go make it, then keep it in your room until Dean gets up.”   
“Tanks, uncle Baby.” Evy said. “Are you okay? Sammy said Deanie was sad because of the job you two just went on.”  
“I’m okay, Baitfish.” Bobby was far from okay, but one struggling family member was enough to burden the tender hearted Evy with.   
Evy decided to make sure. She wrapped Bobby in another hug and said, “I’m glad you back, uncle Baby. Can you stay for a while this time?”   
“I think we can do that, kiddo.” Bobby said. “Thanks for the hugs.”   
“Anytime.” Evy said.   
“Hey, I just thought about something. It’s somebody’s birthday in a couple days. I just can’t remember who…”   
“It’s mine!” Evy said happily.   
“And you’ll be how old? Four?” Bobby asked playfully.   
“Five!”   
“Five, huh? Getting to be a big girl now.” Bobby said.   
“Can a big girl ask for something for dinner?”  
Bobby laughed. “I’ll see what I can do. What’s the request?”   
“Tacos and pie.”   
Bobby nodded. “Your favorite and Dean’s favorite, huh?”   
“Maybe…” Evy said with a slight shrug.   
“Alright, Baitfish. We’ll do it. I was planning to send Sam to the grocery store tonight anyway. He can get the stuff for tacos and pie too.”   
“’Kay. I’m going to make Deanie’s present now.”   
Evy went back to her room, and drew the best picture for Dean that she could. She used up an entire notebook, trying to draw the perfect one. She finally settled on a picture of her and Dean, holding hands, with some bright balloons around them. Sam was teaching her how to write, so she pulled out her alphabet placemat that Sam sometimes had her practice on. She sounded out the words and wrote very carefully on the bottom ‘I luv you Deanie. Im sorry your so sad. I hope this maks u happy. Love Evy’. Finally satisfied with her work, Evy left it on the desk and went outside. A few minutes later, John came home, followed by Sam. A reluctant Dean was dragged out of bed by John to accompany Sam and Evy to the grocery store. After around half the ingredients for the night’s dinner were in the cart, Sam left to secretly buy the cake for Evy’s birthday party that weekend. Evy discovered she had a slight problem.  
“Deanie, I got to go potty.”  
“Well, you’re gonna have to wait.” Dean said gruffly.  
“Deanie, I can’t. I gotta go nowwww…”   
At that moment, Sam came from around the corner. “What’s going on?”   
“I gotta go potty and Deanie won’t take me.” Evy said, squirming in the seat of the shopping cart. “Sammy, will you take me please? I gotta go bad.”   
“Really, Dean?” Sam said, reaching over and pulling Evy out of the cart. “Come on, Cricket, let’s go.”   
Evy reached out to take Sam’s hand, but the worst happened. “Uh oh.”   
Before Sam had registered what had happened, Dean exploded. “Seriously!? You’re turning five years old in three days and you can’t hold your bladder for five minutes?”  
“Dean! Knock it off!” Sam said.   
A crowd was staring at the five of them, and a thoroughly embarrassed Evy burst into tears. Dean wanted to continue his rant, but one murderous look from Sam made him stop talking. Sam picked up a still sobbing Evy, who clung to his neck and shut her eyes tightly so she wasn’t looking at anyone else. Livid with Dean, Sam grabbed Barney, who had been sitting next to Evy in the cart, and spat at Dean,   
“Pay for dinner. Which she asked for to make you happy, by the way. I’m going to the car with her.”   
The ride home was one of the tensest they had ever been through. No one spoke, and Sam sat in the back with a still upset Evy. He tried to comfort her, remind her that it was okay to have an accident, but Dean exploding on her dampened her spirits. When they pulled up to the house, Sam quickly picked up Evy, took her inside, and helped her clean up. He neither knew nor cared where Dean went, until he had Evy sorted out. Once she was done, Sam set her on her bed.  
“Stay in here for a little bit, okay?”   
Evy nodded slowly.   
“You okay?” Sam asked, even though he knew she wasn’t.   
“I feel like a baby.”   
“Hey, I told you. And I meant it. It was an accident, baby, you’ve got no reason to feel bad.” Sam said, pushing away a stray hair.  
“Then why’d Deanie yell at me? In front of all those people? I didn’t mean to do it. I told him I had to go…”   
“I know, I know. I don’t know why Dean yelled at you, but I’m going to find out. But please believe me, okay? You did nothing wrong. Say it back to me.” Sam said gently.   
Evy swallowed and repeated, “I did nothing wrong.”   
“’Kay. I’m going to find Dean. Stay in here until someone comes to get you. Even if you hear yelling. Okay?”   
“’Kay.” Evy said quietly.   
“Hey, you. Look at me.” Evy stopped studying her feet and looked up. “I love you. More than anything else in the whole world. You know that, right?”   
Evy finally smiled. “I love you too.”   
“Give me a kiss?”  
Evy leaned over and kissed Sam’s cheek. Sam walked out of the room, his protective, gentle big brother attitude quickly turning into an angry, enraged big brother that only came out when Evy was hurt. Dean was in the kitchen, standing at the refrigerator grabbing a beer. Bobby was starting on dinner, and John sat at the table. Without saying a word to any of them, Sam walked up, spun Dean around, and knocked to the ground with his fist.   
“Sam, what…?” John started to say, but Sam heard nothing that came out of John’s mouth.  
“What the hell is your problem, Dean!?” Sam asked.   
“Sam, what happened?” John asked. “Dean told us something went wrong grocery shopping…”   
“Really? Did he? Did he happen to tell you that Evy asked three times in the store to be taken to the bathroom? And that when she finally couldn’t hold it anymore and wet her pants, he yelled at her in front of the entire store and embarrassed her?”   
“What?” John asked. “Dean, do you have an explanation?”   
“I just lost my temper, Dad…”   
“Dean.” Bobby said. “Tell them the truth.”   
“Bobby…”   
“They need to know.” Bobby said.   
“The truth about what?” Sam asked.   
“Bobby, I don’t want to talk about it.” Dean said, almost pleadingly.   
“What happened on that hunt, Dean?”   
When Dean looked at Sam, Sam immediately forgot his anger. There was no longer anger in Dean’s eyes, only tears. Painful tears. Sam couldn’t believe what he was seeing. Dean was the strongest of them, or at least like to pretend that he was. Bobby clearly knew more than he’d said about the hunt when he’d called the night before. Let Dean go to bed. A kid died on this hunt. It was bad. Really bad.  
“Dean?” Sam asked. “Dean, what happened?”   
“What did Bobby tell you?”   
“He said that a kid died on the hunt.” John said.   
Dean laughed bitterly. “Yeah, a kid died, that’s for sure.”   
“Dean, it wasn’t your fault.” Bobby said again.  
“Why would Dean think it was his fault?” Sam asked, confused.   
Dean slammed his hand on the refrigerator and shouted, “Because I shot the damn gun!”   
“Dean, start at the beginning. What do you mean you shot the gun?”   
Dean swallowed and said, “The werewolves we were hunting were recruiting kids. They were taking them off the street and turning them. They thought if they turned young kids, they’d keep the pack going longer.”   
“How young?” John asked.   
“The kid they had taken was two.”   
“Two?” Sam asked. “How had they taken kids that young and not killed them?”   
“They hadn’t.” Bobby said. “The youngest kid they turned was eight. They’d taken four more younger than that. Two of them were six, one of them was five. Braeden was two. They’d killed the older three kids, and they had planned to turn Braeden the night that we caught up with them.”  
“What happened?”   
“We made it to their hideout. We confronted them, and we killed all of them but one. The pack leader. We had him cornered. I thought Braeden was behind me, so I took a shot. But he’d wandered from the corner where I’d put him.” Dean took a brief swig of his beer, then set it down. It was making no difference in the way he felt. “I shot him. First in the knee, then in the head. The bullet went through the wolf’s knee, and straight into Braeden’s heart.”   
“Dean…” John said.   
“I killed a damn kid, dad.”   
“Son, Bobby was right. It was an accident.” John said. “You can’t keep blaming yourself. It’ll kill you.”   
“Well maybe it should, Dad!” Dean said.   
“Dean, I know how you feel.”   
“How? How do you know? I killed a baby, Dad!”   
“And so did I.” The room fell silent, and John finally revealed one of his darkest secrets that had nothing to do with hunting. “I was sixteen. My mom had invited a friend over for the day. She had her six year old son with her. I didn’t know that my mom and her friend had told the kid he could go outside to play. The kid was deaf, and he didn’t hear me backing the truck up.”   
“Dad? Why didn’t you ever tell us about this?” Sam asked.   
“Because it’s one of the worst things I’ve ever done.”   
“But Dad, it was…” Dean started to say, then realized what John was doing.   
“It was what, Dean? Finish that sentence.”   
“An accident.”   
“Exactly. Dean, look, I won’t tell you not to feel terrible about this. If you didn’t, I’d be even more worried about you than I am right now. But Dean, it was an accident. You didn’t mean to kill him. I know that. But son, you gotta move on.”   
“How, Dad? How do I move on?” Dean asked.   
“We’ll help you with that, Dean. But you have to take the first step.”  
“What’s that first step?” Dean asked, but even as he asked, he knew. He looked towards Evy’s room and said, “I’ll be back, guys.”   
Dean walked up the stairs and towards Evy’s room, where he found her sitting on the bed, holding onto Barney and staring at the wall. Dean knocked at the door and Evy jumped, wrapped up in her own thoughts. When she saw Dean, she gripped Barney tighter.   
“Hey, kiddo. Can I come in?”   
“Sure.” Evy said quietly.   
Dean walked in and sat on Evy’s bed, wanting to reach out and hug her, but not sure if she would let him. “Listen, I’m sorry about what happened at the store today. I wasn’t mad at you, I was mad at myself and I took it out on you. I’m so sorry for that, baby.”  
“You’re not mad at me?” Evy asked.   
“No. No, I’m not. And I’m sorry I yelled at you.”   
“Are you still sad?” Evy said. “Sammy said this morning you were really sad.”   
“I am. And I’ll be honest, I might be for a while. But if I start acting like a jerk to you again, like I was in the store, I want you to promise me something.”   
“What?” Evy asked.  
“Kick me. Kick me as hard as you can.”   
Evy grinned. “Really?”   
“Really. You forgive me?” Dean asked.  
“Yeah. I forgives you.” Evy said. She thought about the picture on her desk. “Hang on. I gotta show you something.”   
“What?” Dean asked, but Evy ran to her desk, picked up the picture, and handed it to him.   
“I made this for you this morning. I wish I could make you feel better.”  
Dean had tears in his eyes again as he read Evy’s note. Braeden’s death still tore at him, still made him feel as if he was no better than the things he hunted. But Evy’s forgiveness and honest desire to help him, even after he’d been a world class jerk to her, showed him he still had people who cared about him, that he still had a reason to keep living.   
“Deanie? Why are you crying? I didn’t make you sad again, did I?”   
“No. No, kiddo. You didn’t make me sad again. You showed me why I should be happy.” Dean said. He grabbed Evy in a crushing hug and asked, “How about you and me go on that fishing trip tomorrow? Just you and me?”   
“Really? Sammy said you might need a few days.”   
“I’m good to go. You want to?” Dean asked.  
“You bet I do.” Evy said. “You’ll be here for my birthday, right?”   
“You bet I will. I’m proud of you, my big girl.”   
“You really think I’m a big girl?” Evy asked. “I’m not a baby anymore?”   
“You’ll always be our baby. But yes, you’re a big girl now. And I’m so proud of you I can hardly stand it.” Dean said. “Come on, let’s go eat.”   
“I picked you out a pie for dinner.”   
“You did?” Dean knew it, of course. He’d paid for it. But Evy’s face lit up in a grin when she thought it was a surprise, so Dean kept it going. “What kind?”   
“Cherry.”   
“That’s my girl!” Dean said. “Come on, let’s go eat.”


	17. Chapter 17

“Daddy, who’s picking me up from school today?”   
“Sammy is.” John answered as he got his car keys. He checked the clock and saw they had a few more minutes. “Have you got everything?”   
“Yes, sir.” Evy said.   
“Uh oh. I know that look. Tell me what’s going on.” John said.   
Evy sighed. “Is it just gonna be Sammy?”   
Jealousy, John thought, thy name is Jackie. “It should be. Why? Are you worried Jackie’ll be with him?”   
“Yes, sir.” Evy said sadly.  
“Come here. Sit down. We’ve got a few minutes.” John placed Evy’s backpack by the door and picked her up to put her in his lap. “What’s going on?”   
“I miss Sammy.”   
“Sammy’s been home almost every single night.” John pointed out.  
“But he’s always on the phone with Jackie. And when I ask him to play with me or read to me or something like that, he does it real fast so he can go right back to Jackie.” Evy said.   
“Little one, listen to me. I know it’s hard to see Sammy spend time with somebody else. But it doesn’t mean that he doesn’t love you just as much as he always has.” John explained.   
“I wish he’d tell me that.” Evy said sadly.  
“What do you mean?”   
“He used to tell me he loved me every night before I went to sleep. He hasn’t done that.” Evy said.   
“He still loves you, little one. He’s just been a little forgetful lately.” John said, rubbing her back to try and comfort her. But he won’t be when I’m done with him, he thought. “You ready to go to school?”   
“I guess so.” Evy said.   
“Hey. Everything’ll be okay. I promise.”   
“Okay, Daddy.” Evy walked to the door and picked up her backpack. “Daddy? Are you gonna get a girlfriend too?”   
John laughed. “I think you’re safe from that, sweetie. Come on, let’s go to school.”   
A detailed conversation about zoo animals and which one Evy would like to be and which one she thought John and Dean and Sam should be later, Evy was dropped off at school and John was on his way to the garage. He’d been there for a couple of hours, when the problem with Evy and Sam finally became too much for him to keep worrying about.   
“Hey, Morris, I’m gonna take a long lunch. I have to go see Sam about something.”   
“Sure thing, boss. Take your time. We’ll call you if we need you.”   
It occurred to John as he pulled up to Sam’s office that he hadn’t thought to ask if Sam was in court. It then occurred to John that he’d never actually seen Sam in court. The office was locked, with a note on the front of it that said ‘In court all day. If it’s an emergency, call my cell. -Samuel Winchester’. John turned to walk back to his car, when he was stopped by an older woman in the market next door.   
“Excuse me? Are you Sam’s father?”   
“Yes, ma’am, I am.” John said. “Do you know him?”   
“I do know him. Very well. You should be very proud of him. He’s a sweet boy.”   
John smiled. “Yes, ma’am, he is. I’m just about to go and see him in court.”   
“You have a very sweet little girl too. You’re a lucky man.”   
“You know Evy?” John asked.  
“I do. Sam lets her come visit me when she goes to work with him. She’s a lot of company for an old lady like me.” The shop owner walked out and extended her hand towards John. “Annie Pearson.”   
“John Winchester. It’s nice to meet you.”   
“You too.” Mrs. Pearson pulled a Hershey bar and a blueberry cereal bar out of her pocket. “Would you give these to Sam and Evy for me?”   
“Sure. Thanks. I will. And listen, if you ever have any trouble with your car, I own the garage on North Avenue. Come see me.” John said.   
“I better get back inside. You have a nice day.”   
“You too.”   
John walked the short distance down to the courthouse. He easily found where Sam was, and stood in the back of the room to watch him for a minute. From what John could gather, Sam’s client had lost a lot of money from a less than savory contractor who did such a bad job on the house he was working on that his client was essentially homeless. The way that Sam fought his case reminded John of his old zeal to hunt the supernatural. Sam had truly found his calling, and John couldn’t be prouder of him. The judge dismissed for lunch, and John made his way to the front of the courtroom. Sam was reminding his client to be back five minutes early, then turned to leave and practically crashed into John.   
“Oh, sor…Dad? What are you doing here?”   
“I came to see you in action.” John said.   
Sam smiled, surprised. “Really?”   
“Yeah. You’re quite impressive, son. I’m proud of you.”   
Sam was stunned at John’s unsolicited praise. “Thanks, Dad. Did you need something?”  
“Yeah. You got a few minutes to talk?”   
“Sure. Come down to the cafeteria with me. My treat.” Sam said.   
Once the two of them were sitting down together, John asked, “How’s Jackie?”   
“She is amazing.” Sam said with a wide grin.   
“I’m glad you found someone, Sam. I really am. And Jackie’s a great girl.”   
“But…” Sam asked.  
“But your sister’s feeling shafted.”   
“Ugh. I thought I did it better this time.” Sam said. “I’ve been making sure to talk to her every day.”   
“I know. I know you’re trying. And you’re not in trouble or anything like that. She just…she doesn’t understand why there has to be a new person with you. Just talk to her when you pick her up from school.” John suggested.  
“I will, Dad.”  
“And Sam? She’s upset too because you haven’t told her you love her when she’s said goodnight to you.” John said.   
“What?” Sam started to dispute it, then realized that John was probably right. He had been distracted the last few weeks with Jackie and hadn’t been paying attention. “I’ll make it better, Dad. I’ll take her to the park after school and spend some one on one time with her.”   
“That sounds like a great idea, Sam. We’ll see you at dinnertime.”   
“Okay. Thanks for telling me, Dad.” Sam said.   
“I have to get back to the garage. See you tonight.” John said. As he stood up to go, he said, “Sam? I meant what I said. I’m proud of you. And I’m sorry I didn’t come see you earlier.”   
Sam nodded. “Thanks, Dad.”   
With the matter behind them, at least for now, John was able to focus more at work. He went back home and started on dinner. His cell phone had died in the middle of the day, so he kept it on the charger powered down. Dean and Bobby came inside, and just as they were about to set the table and John was wondering where Sam was with Evy, the doorbell rang. He was surprised to find Evy standing there with the school principal, Mrs. Ball.   
“What’s going on?”   
A tearful Evy grabbed John’s leg. “Sammy forgot me!”   
“Oh.” John looked to Mrs. Ball and said, “I’m so sorry. It seems there’s been a misunderstanding.”   
“It’s okay, Mr. Winchester. It happens a couple times a month. Don’t worry about it.” Mrs. Ball turned to Evy. “Good night, sweetheart.”   
Evy turned from John’s leg and waved. “Good night.”   
As John closed the door, he picked Evy up and asked, “What happened?”   
“Sammy never came to get me.”   
“Did you try to call me or uncle Bobby or Dean?” John asked.  
“I tried you but I couldn’t remember Deanie or uncle Bobby’s phone number and Mrs. Ball couldn’t find it.” Evy said.   
That’ll change, John thought. “Okay, little one. You’re home now, it’s okay.”   
But a devastated Evy cried into John’s shoulder, “He forgot me.”   
The heartbreak behind Evy’s statement left John speechless, and all he could do was hold her as he made dinner. She eventually stopped crying out of exhaustion, and John was lost as to how to make her feel better. Usually it was Sam who was best at comforting Evy at a time like this. Dean tried to tickle her to make her smile, which worked a little, but Evy was still depressed. Just as John finished setting the table, Sam came inside.   
“I’m home!”  
Sam was surprised by the lack of response. He walked to his room, placed his briefcase on his bed, and walked to the kitchen. Evy was picking at her plate, refusing to look at him. Dean looked nervous, John looked angry, and Bobby was just shaking his head.  
“Is something wrong?”   
“Sam, where were you today?” John asked.  
“What are you talking about? You came to see me…” Sam remembered where he was supposed to be and his heart dropped. “I was supposed to pick you up from school.”   
Evy finally looked up from her plate, eyes burning with anger and hurt. “You forgot me! I waited for you for a long time, Sammy. My principal had to bring me home!”  
“Cricket, I’m so sorry…”   
“Daddy, can I eat in my room, please?” Evy asked.   
John nodded. “Sure, little one. Bring your plate back here when you’re done.”   
Evy left and went to her room, marching past Sam and ignoring his pleas for forgiveness.   
“Dad, I’m sorry…”   
“Sam, where were you? She’s been home half an hour and she just stopped crying.”   
Sam ran a hand through his hair. “Jackie called and said she wanted to talk.”   
“You didn’t pick up your sister because you were with Jackie? Sam, that’s exactly what she was worried about.” John said. “What was so important that you forgot to go pick up your sister? Or call someone and ask them to do it?”   
Sam laughed bitterly. “Her husband.”   
“Her…her what?” John asked.  
“Her husband. She wanted to tell me in person that she was married, that she had left her husband, and that she’s decided to go back to him and give him another chance.” Sam said.  
“Dude!” Dean said sympathetically. “Sorry, man.”   
“Thanks, Dean.”   
“Yeah, Sam. Sorry, buddy.” Bobby said.   
“I’m sorry too, Sam. I know you really liked her.” John said.   
“Thanks, guys.” Sam sighed and ran a hand through his hair. “I guess I should go talk to Evy now.”   
“You can wait a minute if you need to.” John said.   
“No. It’s okay. I could use the distraction.”   
Sam got up and walked up the stairs to Evy’s bedroom. On the way, he thought about the last time he’d had this problem. It had been Evy’s tenth birthday, and he’d forgotten to pick her up for the day like he’d promised. He’d gotten wrapped up spending time with Jess and it had just slipped his mind. Sam made it to Evy’s door and found her sitting at her desk, head on one hand as she picked at her food with the other. Sam knocked at Evy’s door.   
“Can I come in?”   
“No.” Evy said, not looking up from her plate.   
“Please?” Sam asked.   
Evy sighed. “Fine.”   
Sam walked over and sat on the floor in front of Evy’s bed. He extended an arm towards her and asked, “Come sit with me? Please?”   
Evy wanted to say no, but she still felt bad and needed a hug. Part of her knew that Sam was sorry, that he did love her and would never forget her on purpose. But she couldn’t forget how she’d felt at school, sitting in the office and wondering at first why Sam was so late, then getting scared that he wasn’t coming at all. Evy climbed into Sam’s lap and let him hold her for a moment before Sam finally started talking.   
“I’m really sorry I didn’t pick you up from school.”  
Evy sniffed. “Why didn’t you? You scared me, I thought something bad happened to you.”  
Sam fought a smile as he thought remember this speech if you’re ever late for curfew. “I’m sorry, Cricket. Me and Jackie got into a fight, and going to get you just slipped my mind.”   
Evy was surprised. Sam and Jackie were always laughing, kissing, and off in a corner by themselves. She sat up and for the first time noticed that Sam looked sad. Sam pushed a hair out of Evy’s face, his go to move when he was thinking about what to say to her.   
“You got in a fight?”   
“Yeah. We did.” Sam said.   
“Are you okay?”  
“I’m fine, Cricket.” Sam said.   
“Is Jackie coming back?”   
“I don’t think so.” Sam said.  
“I’m sorry, Sammy. I know you liked her.” Evy thought about hugging Sam again to make him feel better before a thought scared her. “She didn’t leave because of me, did she?”   
“Why would you think that?” Sam asked.  
Evy suddenly looked ashamed. “I don’t want to hurt your feelings.”   
“It’s okay, Cricket. I promise I won’t get mad.”   
“I didn’t really like Jackie.” Evy admitted.   
Sam nodded. “I figured. Is it because I spent so much time with her instead of you?”   
“Partly.” Evy said.   
“Was there another reason?”   
“Yeah. Jackie wasn’t very nice to you. Or me.” Evy said.   
“What do you mean?” Sam asked.   
“She was always on the phone instead of talking to you. I tried to talk to her once while you were getting something out of the car and she told me to go away.”   
“What? Why didn’t you tell me about that?” Sam asked.   
“Because you liked her so much. I didn’t want to hurt you.”   
Sam smiled. “You’ve got such a big heart, you know that?”   
“What’s that mean?” Evy asked.   
“It means…” Sam said, pulling her to him for a hug again, “that you are the sweetest kid in the entire universe,” Sam kissed her cheek, “and that I love you,” he kissed her other cheek, “more than anything else”, he kissed the top of her head, which made Evy start to giggle, “or anyone else”, Sam kissed her cheek again, which Evy tried to block and started laughing when she was unsuccessful, “anywhere. Understand?”   
“I understand.” Evy said. “I love you too, Sammy.”   
“Will you come eat dinner in the kitchen with me?”   
“Will you hold me while we eat?” Evy asked.  
“Yes, I will.” Sam said. “Grab your plate.”   
Evy grabbed her plate off her desk and walked back to Sam. “Let’s go.”   
“Hey. One more thing.”  
“What is it?” Evy asked.  
“If I don’t tell you I love you before you go to sleep, and I’m in the house, you call me to your room and I’ll not only tell you I love you, but I’ll read you two more stories. Deal?”   
Evy shook her head. “No.”   
“No? You don’t want me to read to you?”   
“One story you read and one you make up.” Evy said. “Starting tonight for all the nights you forgot.”   
Sam laughed. He felt like he’d just lost a negotiation with the shrewdest businesswoman he’d ever met. “Deal. We good now?”   
“We’re good. Let’s go eat. I’m hungry.”   
“Yes, ma’am. Let’s go eat.”


	18. Chapter 18

“Well, kiddo, how’s it feel to be done with kindergarten?”   
Dean stood at the stove, fixing Evy’s grilled cheese sandwich along with his own for lunch. Bobby was out helping an elderly neighbor with some repairs on a house, and Sam and John were working. It was the first day of summer vacation for Evy, and she was officially a first grader now. It made Dean a little sad, that the little kid who’d literally dropped out of the sky for them was growing up again. A selfish part of him wanted to keep her little, but he was also insanely proud at how smart she was.  
“I kinda miss it.” Evy said.   
Dean couldn’t help it, he started to laugh.   
“What’s so funny?” Evy asked.   
“You’re so much like Sammy. That’s what’s funny.”   
“How?” Evy asked.   
“He liked school a lot too.” Dean explained. He put both plates on the table. “What do you want to drink, kiddo?”   
“Apple juice, please.”   
“Coming right up.” Dean said.   
“Deanie, can I be ‘scused? I gotta go potty.”   
“Sure thing, kiddo.” Dean said.   
Evy got down off her chair and headed to the bathroom. As she went, she heard the phone ringing, and when she came back to the table, there was a cup on the table filled with juice. Evy wanted to wait for Dean, but she was really hungry. She took a sip of her juice, and noticed that it tasted and smelled funny. But it wasn’t too bad, so she finished her sandwich and juice and started to get down. Dean was still talking on the phone, so Evy placed her plate in the sink and started to head to her room. By the time she got to the living room, she knew something was wrong. Her head started to hurt, and her stomach felt funny. She sat on the couch and started to lay down. Her stomach swirled again, and she called for Dean.  
“Deanie!”   
Dean came to the living room, alarmed by Evy’s slightly slurred speech. “Kiddo? You okay?”   
“I don’t feel good. My tummy and my head hurts.”   
Dean instinctively felt her forehead. “You don’t have a fever. When did you start feeling bad?”   
“After I ate my sandwich.”   
Dean laughed, but he was getting worried. “I’m not that bad a cook am I?”   
But instead of making her laugh as his bad jokes usually did, Evy groaned. “Deanie, I feel really bad.”   
“Okay, kiddo, okay. You think you’re gonna throw up?”   
“I don’t know.” Evy whined.   
“Alright. Lay down, kiddo.”  
Dean got even more worried when she laid down without a struggle. He took the blanket off the back of the couch and put it on top of her. He grabbed the small trash can out of the kitchen and placed it next to the couch. He checked her for a fever again, relieved that she didn’t have one.   
“You want me to bring you anything, kiddo?”   
“Will you get Barney off my bed, please?” Evy asked.   
“Sure, kiddo.”   
Dean got Barney for her, then headed to the kitchen to try to find out what had made Evy so sick so fast. When he saw the cup on the table and the juice container next to the sink, he put the pieces together and his mouth dropped open. There’s no way I was that stupid. The juice container was still sealed. Dean walked to the sink and pulled up Evy’s cup. He realized then what had happened. Dean’s beer can had somehow gotten a hole in it, so he’d poured it into a cup. When the phone had rung, he’d gone to get it, and apparently had forgotten to pour Evy some juice. Dean had no choice but to come out of his denial. Evy wasn’t sick. She was drunk. Yep. It’s been a good life, Dean. Hope you enjoyed it, because you’re about to die.   
“Shit.” Dean said under his breath. He pulled out his phone and called his father. “Dad, Evy’s really sick. You need to come home.”  
Should I run now or later? Dean thought to himself. He heard a retching sound from the living room and went running. Evy was throwing up into the trash can that Dean had placed next the couch. Dean kept her hair behind her head and held her in his lap when it was over. As he held her, he started worrying less about how John was going to react and more about Evy. How quickly she’d gotten sick scared him. John pulled up a few minutes later, and went immediately to Evy.   
“What’s wrong, little one?”   
“N..non’t feel g…good.” Evy slurred.   
“Dean, what the hell happened?”   
Here goes nothing. “She accidentally drank a beer.”   
“EXCUSE ME?” John yelled, but immediately regretted it when Evy whined. “Sorry, little one. What happened?”  
“I was making lunch and she got up to go to the bathroom. The phone rang and I went to get it. I had poured my beer into a cup and went to get the phone, but I forgot to pour her juice.” Dean said. “She must have thought the cup on the table was her juice.”  
“Is that what happened, little one?” John asked.  
“Yes, ‘ir.” Evy said. “Deanie, I’m gonna be sick again.”   
Dean quickly turned her around and she threw up a second time. This wasn’t as bad as the first time, so Dean hoped she was getting better. John was already in the process of picking up his keys.   
“Dean, get her in the Impala.”   
“Dad…” Dean said, the guilt starting to eat at him.   
“Dean, she’s got alcohol poisoning. We have to take her to the hospital. We’ll talk later. Get her in the Impala. Now.”   
“Yes, sir.”   
Dean picked up Evy and took her to the car, bundling her into a blanket and getting in the backseat with her. While holding on to her, he called Bobby and Sam, who somehow managed to beat them to the hospital. Sam took a sick and slurring Evy as John filled out the emergency room paperwork. Sam, who was unconsciously bouncing his knee up and down as he held Evy, was promptly rewarded with a shirt full of vomit.   
“Sorry, Sammy.” Evy whimpered as she was transferred into Bobby’s lap.   
Sam bent down in front of her. “Don’t worry about it. You just worry about getting better.”   
“Okay.” Evy said.   
At that moment, a familiar face approached them in the waiting area. “And how’s my favorite patient today?”   
Evy looked up and smiled for the first time since getting sick. “Hi, Doctor Barry.”   
“Hello, Evy. What brings you by?”   
“I’m not feel too good.” Evy said.   
“I see that. Do you know what happened?”   
“She accidentally drank one of Dean’s beers.” John growled, throwing Dean a look of pure disappointment.   
“I see.” Barry said. “Well, if that’s the case, we need to get your stomach looked at, little lady.”   
“Yes, please.” Evy said.   
“Alright, then. Come on.” Barry said, giving her a reassuring pat on the head. He turned to the rest of the group and said, “One of you needs to carry her to the exam room.”   
“Daddy.” Evy said automatically, reaching out to John.   
“Cricket, I’m going to get changed, okay?”   
“Sam, I can get you a scrub top if you need it.” Barry offered.   
“Sammy? Will you go back and get Barney for me please?” Evy asked.   
“Of course I will, Cricket.” Sam said. He kissed her cheek and said, “I’ll be back soon, okay?”   
“Okay.” Evy said.   
Sam frowned; Evy sounded downright pitiful. “They’ll get you feeling better, Cricket. Don’t worry.”   
Getting Evy’s stomach pumped was an experience no one ever wanted to repeat. She cried the entire time, and gripped Bobby’s and eventually Sam’s hand so hard that they thought their hands would fall off. An hour and a half later, after the stomach pump and blood tests revealed that most, but not quite all, of the alcohol was out of her system, Evy was sleeping on the hospital bed. John turned to Dean, who was now not bothering to hide the tears streaming down his face.   
“Dean…”   
“Dad, I’m sorry.” Dean said. Listening to Evy crying and seeing her so sick had shredded Dean’s heart. “It’s my fault…”   
“No, Dean, it’s not.” John said, and Bobby and Sam nodded in agreement. “It was an accident.”   
“A stupid one.” Dean said quietly.   
“Dean it could’ve happened to any of us.” John said.   
“If you hadn’t called your dad when you did, this could have turned out a whole lot worse.” Bobby said.   
“It was a mistake. She’ll be okay.” Sam tried.   
“She’s been poisoned!” Dean said. “She could have died!”   
“But she didn’t.”   
“Daddy…”  
Evy was stirring awake, and John brushed her hair out of her eyes. “Hello, little one.”   
“What happened?”   
“What do you remember?” John asked.  
“Eating lunch and getting really sick.”   
“Baby, when you were drinking your juice at lunch, did it taste funny?” Sam asked.  
“A little.”   
“Why didn’t you give it back to Dean?” Sam asked.   
“It tasted a little weird, but you said it was because my nose was stuffy.”   
Suddenly the pieces fell into place for everyone. Evy had been sick with a cold two weeks earlier, and had complained of nothing she ate having any taste. Sam had explained that a cold can change the way things taste. She thought the juice tasted funny because she was still a little sick, not because it wasn’t juice.  
“Daddy? Did my juice make me sick?”   
“Baitfish, it wasn’t your juice.” Bobby said.  
“What? What was it?”   
“It was Dean’s beer, little one.” John explained.   
Evy’s stomach clenched in fear. One of the biggest rules of the house was not to drink the beer that Sam, Dean, John, and Bobby drank. “Daddy, I didn’t know. I thought it was my juice.”   
“It was my fault, kiddo.” Dean said, moving to the other side of Evy’s bed. “I forgot to pour your juice for you. I’m so sorry.”   
“Sorry for what?” Evy asked.   
“Getting you so sick.”   
Evy saw that Dean had been crying. She knew that Dean had made a mistake, and that he’d never hurt her on purpose. Evy reached up and touched Dean’s cheek. “It’s okay, Deanie. You didn’t mean it.”  
Dean smiled and kissed Evy’s palm. “No, I didn’t. I love you, kiddo.”   
“Love you too, Deanie.” Evy said. “Daddy, am I in trouble for this?”   
John sighed. “No. It was an accident. But do you see now why you can’t drink beer until you’re a grownup?”   
Evy nodded. “Yes, sir. I don’t wanna get sick again.”   
“Good girl.” John said. He leaned over and whispered something into Evy’s ear.   
Evy nodded. “Deanie? Can I sleep with you tonight?”   
“You bet, kiddo.”   
The door to the room opened, and Barry stepped in. “John, Bobby, can I talk to you two in the hallway, please?”   
“Something wrong?” Bobby asked.  
“I just need your guys’ help with something.”   
The tone of Barry’s voice, a mix of get the hell out here now and this is serious, made both Bobby and John get up right away. They walked out with Barry, telling Sam and Dean to stay in with Evy. When they were in the hallway, Barry pulled them to the side and said,  
“I have good news and bad news. The good news is Evy should be just fine. We pumped enough out of her stomach that she can just wait the rest of it out. She’ll probably feel lousy for a couple days, but she should be okay after that.”   
“What’s the bad news?”   
Barry looked around and gestured the two of them to come closer. “You tell anyone I warned you this, I’ll deny it. I could lose my job and my license.”   
“We won’t. What’s up?” Bobby asked.   
Barry sighed. “One of my nurses saw the paperwork on Evy and she called social services. There’s a caseworker on her way here now.”   
“WHAT?” John shouted. “WHAT THE HELL?”   
“John, calm down.” Barry said.  
“Someone’s trying to take my kid away. Why should I calm down…?”   
“Because if you don’t, I can’t keep her with you. I need you to listen to me. I’ve got a plan, but you’ve got to trust me.” Barry said.   
“Dr. Nellis?” A woman asked, coming up behind the three of them. Barry turned around to find a young woman in her late twenties standing there, with a clipboard and a serious no nonsense demeanor. “I’m Ellie Goldstein, Sioux Falls Child Protective Services.”  
“How can I help you?”   
“I’m here for one of your patients, an…” Ellie looked down at her clipboard, “Evelyn Winchester.”   
“Why are you here for her? I’m her doctor and I didn’t call you.”   
“It was an anonymous caller. Now may I see Evelyn please?”   
“No.” Barry said without reservation. “No, you may not see her. She’s resting in bed right now and that’s exactly where she’s going to stay.”  
“I need to speak to her…”  
“You need to leave her alone so she can sleep.” Barry said. “I’m holding her for twenty-four hours for observation, and you will not disturb her until then.”   
“You know…”   
“In case I was too polite, you need to get lost.” Barry said finally. “You go in that child’s room before I give you permission, and I’ll have you arrested before you can blink.”   
“Fine.” Ellie said, decidedly less enthusiastically than before. She handed Barry a business card. “Call me when I can see her.”   
“We’ll see.” Barry said. Ellie turned and left, and Barry turned to an obviously angry John. “John, listen to me. Don’t panic. I’m friends with her boss, I’m going to my office to call him now. Okay?”   
John nodded. “Can you tell me the nurse that called?”   
“You know I can’t do that.” Barry said. “But I’ll handle that too.” A few minutes later, Barry came back to Evy’s room, where John and Bobby were attempting to cheer up a still somewhat sluggish Evy. “I took care of it guys.”   
“Thanks, Barry.” Bobby said. “Can we take her home now?”   
“Unfortunately, no. She does have to spend the night. Since I told the social worker here earlier that she had to stay for observation, she needs to do that for the case to officially be dropped.”  
“I can’t go home?” Evy asked sadly.   
“Not tonight, little lady.” Barry said. “But your family can stay here with you.”   
“’Kay.” Evy said. “Thank you, Doctor Barry.”   
“You’re welcome, sweetheart.” Barry smiled. “You know, if you’re hungry, you can eat a little something.” When Evy furiously shook her head, Barry smiled. “Stomach still hurt a little?”   
“Yeah.”   
“Okay. But I do want you to drink some water. I’ll have a nurse bring it to you. Will you do that for me?” Barry asked.   
“I’ll try.” Evy said.   
“Okay, sweetie. You get some sleep. I’ll have some cots brought in for you guys.”   
When Barry was gone, Evy turned to Dean. “Deanie?”   
“Yeah, kiddo?”   
Evy coughed a little. “Will you get up here with me please?”   
“You bet I will.” Dean climbed up next to her on the bed. “How’s that?”   
“Good.”   
“Can I get up there too?” Sam asked. Evy nodded, and soon the bed was crowded with Sam, Dean, and her. “You comfy?”   
“Yeah. Thanks, guys. Love you.”   
“We love you too, kiddo.” Dena said. “We love you too.”


	19. Chapter 19

An irate John Winchester drove in complete silence. Evy sat behind him, arms crossed over her chest, equally angry. John had worked hard the three years Evy had been with him to stay patient and understanding with her, but it was getting hard now. But it was the middle of the day. Evy should have been in class, and he should have been working. He shouldn’t have been picking her up from school because of getting in a fight. John parked the car and turned to Evy.   
“Get inside and go sit in the time-out spot. Do not move from there until I come to get you.”   
Despite her earlier anger and annoyance, Evy frowned. “Daddy, when are you gonna let me tell you what happened?”   
“I know what happened. You got in a fight and beat up another kid in your class.”  
“That’s not it.” Evy insisted.   
“Evelyn, enough!” John snapped. “I had to leave work early because of you. You really messed up today. Now get inside and go to time out.”   
“Yes, sir.” Evy said, picking up her backpack with much more force than necessary.   
“And stay there until you calm down.”   
Evy didn’t respond, just snatched up her backpack, climbed out of the car, and slammed the door much harder than necessary. John sighed; he knew he’d been too rough on her, blaming him leaving work on her. It had been a dumb playground fight, started over who knew what reason. But since Evy wasn’t hurt, at least in John’s eyes, there was no excuse for the fight. No matter how much Evy insisted she was in the right, he had to deal with it. John waited a few minutes, then walked inside. Evy was sitting on the bottom step, backpack in front of her, pouting.   
“Have you calmed down?”   
“No, sir.” Evy mumbled.   
“Why not?” John asked.  
Evy looked up at him, her eyes the very reflection of her angry mother’s. “I didn’t do anything wrong.”   
John’s anger flared up again at her stubbornness. He knew that if Bobby were there, he’d just tell him she inherited it from him, but as right as that probably was, he was in no mood for it just then. “Fine. Stay right there until you figure it out.”   
Evy turned away from him but stayed on the bottom step as instructed. When she wiped her eyes, John could have kicked his own ass. Way to go, dumbass. You’re stooping to the same level as a six-year-old. Afraid to inflame the situation any further, John stood up and walked to the kitchen. He had just gotten there when he heard Sam come in and talk to Evy from the front door.   
“Hey, Cricket. What are you doing home?”   
“I’m not supposed to talk, Sammy. I’m in trouble.” Evy said, her tone making it very clear exactly how unfair she thought that was.   
“Where’s Daddy?” Sam asked.  
“He’s in the kitchen.”   
John heard Sam give Evy a kiss, and soon Sam was in the kitchen with him. “Dad, what’s going on?”   
“I got a call from her school today. She got in a fight with another classmate.”   
Sam’s eyes got huge. “What? Over what?”  
“It doesn’t matter ‘over what’. She made it clear he didn’t provoke her in any way, so it’s completely unjustified.” John said. When Sam started shaking his head, John asked, “What? You disagree?”   
“Did you ask her why she did it?” Sam asked. “She doesn’t just fight people for no reason, Dad.”   
“No.” John admitted. “But she’s too angry at me to talk to me right now.”   
“You’re not gonna make her stay on the step the entire afternoon, are you?” Sam asked.  
John sighed. “No. I’ll let you be the good guy. Tell her she can go up to her room.”   
“Okay, Dad. You want me to try to talk to her?”   
“No. I want her in her room for a while, until she can talk to me herself.” John said.   
Sam shook his head.  
“What is it, Sam?” John asked.   
“Dad, she’s just as stubborn as you are. If you wait for her to admit you’re right, she’s gonna be in her room for days.” Sam said. “What does she have to do for you to let her come out?”   
John sighed; he knew Sam was right, and he had to be the adult in this situation. “Apologize for the fight and agree to apologize to the boy she fought with when she goes back to school.”   
“That’s it?”   
“She’ll have to go to bed early while she’s suspended, but that’s it.” John said.   
Sam smiled. “You’re getting soft in your old age, dad.”   
“I’ll pretend I didn’t hear that.”   
Sam walked to Evy’s room and, not surprisingly, found her sitting on her bed, back towards the headboard, hands crossed over her chest, looking at her bedspread like it had personally pissed her off. Sam knocked at the door and Evy turned her head. She relaxed when she noticed it was him and not John.  
“Hi, Sammy.”   
“Hey. Can I come in?” Sam asked.  
“Sure.”   
Sam walked in and sat on the edge of her bed. “Dad tells me you got in a fight today.”   
“Yeah, I did.”   
“You know better than to fight.” Sam said.   
Suddenly, Evy’s scowl returned.   
“I talked to Daddy. He said all you have to do is apologize for the fight and go to bed early while you’re suspended. That’s a pretty good deal, Cricket.” Sam said.  
“I didn’t do anything wrong.” Evy insisted.   
“Okay. You have to stay in your room until you do it.”   
“Fine. Guess I’ll stay in here forever.” Evy said dramatically.  
“I wish you’d come out. I’m gonna miss you.” Sam said. “Will you promise me you’ll think about it?”   
“I didn’t do anything wrong.” Evy said again.   
Sam sighed. “Okay. Daddy and I are out here in the kitchen. Call us if you change your mind.”   
Sam kissed her cheek before he left, and while she didn’t back away from him, she didn’t return the gesture either. Dean tried a few minutes later to get Evy to come out, with the same results. Evy knew she was banished to her room because she was supposed to be thinking about what she did. The more she thought about it, the more she knew she was right, and if everyone would just listen to her, they’d see it too. Downstairs in the living room, John had changed out of his work clothes, and he was also thinking about the day’s events. He realized her really hadn’t given Evy a chance to explain herself. And the more he thought about it, the more he regretted that. Evy had a temper, but her fuse was long and slow burning. She just wasn’t one to explode for no reason. What in the world had set her off like that? Had she been teased? Was she being bullied and finally snapped? Just as the curiosity got to be too much, Bobby walked in. John gave him a rundown of what had happened, and wasn’t surprised by Bobby’s reaction.   
“You idjit! Why didn’t you let her explain?”   
John shrugged. “My stubborn temper?”   
“Stubborn’s damn right.” Bobby said. “How long has she been in her room?”   
John checked the clock and thought about lying, but he knew Bobby would somehow find out. “Three hours.”   
“Three…” Bobby shook his head and asked, “What the hell were you thinking?”  
“Bobby, will you please just go talk to her?” John asked. “You can kick my ass later.”   
“Remember that promise.” Bobby said as he headed up to Evy’s room.   
Bobby found Evy in much the same position Sam had found her in, only this time she was wiping her eyes. She was crying and trying to hide it, so Bobby decided to ignore it. He stood there for a moment, waiting for her to acknowledge him, but when she didn’t, he knocked on the wall beside the door.   
“Hi, uncle Bobby.”   
“Hey, Baitfish. I heard you had a big day today.” Bobby said.   
Evy turned to him and said, almost desperately, “No one’ll listen to me.”   
“I will. Why don’t you tell me what happened?”  
Evy’s story finally came out, and Bobby thought to himself can’t wait to see the look on that idjit’s face now. When she was finally done talking, she came to Bobby for a hug. Bobby calmed her and said,  
“Listen, Baitfish, I want you to come downstairs with me.”   
“Daddy said I had to stay in here ‘till I apologized.” Evy said.   
“You want me to bring him up here to you?” Evy nodded. “Okay. I’ll be right back.” He went down and collected Sam, Dean, and John. “All three of you need to listen to her and not interrupt her. Baitfish, tell them what you told me.”   
Evy turned to them and held Barney as she talked. “There’s a little girl in my class named Izzie. She doesn’t come to school a lot because she’s always sick.”   
“Sick how?” Sam asked.   
Evy shrugged. “I don’t really know. She said her heart doesn’t work right.” Evy didn’t notice the looks on her family’s face as she kept on with her story. “She came to school today and she was crying because her mommy said she couldn’t come play outside with us anymore. So I asked if I could stay inside and play with her so she wouldn’t be sad.”   
“You gave up playing outside with your friends just so she wouldn’t be alone?” Sam asked.  
Evy nodded. “I don’t like to be by myself, so I didn’t want her to be either.”  
“What happened next?” Dean asked.  
“Jack, the boy I got in the fight with, he asked to stay and play with us too. I didn’t want him too because he’s mean to most of the kids in the class. But Mrs. Innis said if he wanted to stay, he could too.”   
“What did you guys do while everyone else was outside?” Sam asked.   
“Izzie wanted to color, so we sat at the back table and drew some pictures. Mrs. Innis sat at her desk reading. Jack kept leaning over and whispering mean stuff to Izzie. He was making her cry again, so I told him to stop, but he wouldn’t.”   
“Why didn’t you tell your teacher? Or walk away?” John asked.   
“Daddy, I did tell her. I told her three times. And I didn’t want to walk away because I didn’t want to leave Izzie.”   
“What did your teacher do?” John asked.  
“She told him to stop, but as soon as she turned her back, Jack was doing it again. The rule’s supposed to be that if your teacher talks to you three times, you go to the principal’s office. I told her the third time he was doing it, but she just told him to stop again and didn’t send him anywhere. Not even to the corner.” Evy said. “Jack picked on her again, and Izzie started crying really hard. That’s when I hit Jack.”   
John felt even dumber than he had earlier. Evy really hadn’t been fighting just to fight. She’d been defending a sick classmate who couldn’t stand up for herself. To make matters worse, she had tried to get an adult to stop what was going on, but no one would listen. Exactly like when she got home, he thought.   
“Daddy, I’m sorry. I know I shouldn’t have hit Jack, but I didn’t know what else to do to make him stop. I tried to get Mrs. Innis to stop him, but she wouldn’t. I tried to tell him myself, but he wouldn’t. I know what it feels like…” Evy said, then suddenly stopped and looked away.  
“You know what what feels like?” Sam asked.  
“I know what it feels like to get picked on ‘cause you’re smaller than everyone else.” Evy said sadly. “But I can stand up for myself. Izzie can’t. She’s too sick.”   
“Do you get bullied at school?” Sam asked, concerned.   
“A little.” Evy admitted. “But I walk away or just tease them back. Or I challenge them to a game on the playground and beat them.”   
Dean smiled. “That’s my girl.”   
“Daddy? I know you’re mad, and I am sorry I let you down. But I’m not sorry for what I did.”   
John sat down on the bed and told her sincerely, “You didn’t let me down, little one. In fact, I’ve never been so proud of you.”   
“Really?” Evy asked. “Even though I can’t go back to school?”   
“I’m not happy about that, but I’m even more unhappy that your teacher let everything go the way it did. It was her responsibility to stop Jack from teasing your friend. Next time, if you or Izzie is being picked on, and she won’t do anything about it, I want you to walk out of class and go to the principal’s office.”   
“Won’t I get in trouble for walking out of class?” Evy asked.  
“Not with me. But you only do it if you or Izzie is being picked on. Understand?”   
“Yes, sir.” Evy said. “Am I in trouble for getting suspended?”   
“Well…” John said, “I can’t just let you stay home and do nothing. So I was thinking about bringing you to help me at the garage.”   
Evy smiled. “I like helping you.”   
“And I like having you.” John said. “And I’m sorry I didn’t let you tell me what happened when you got home.”  
Before Evy could respond, the doorbell rang. Evy quickly gave her father a hug, then walked downstairs with everyone to see who was at the door. Bobby opened it to find a woman standing there, who looked to be about the same age as Dean, holding the hand of a little girl. Evy answered the question of who it was before anyone could ask.   
“Hi, Izzie!”   
“Hi, Evy.” Izzie said with a wave.  
“You must be the famous Izzie we’ve been hearing about.” Bobby said.   
“Hi.” Izzie said shyly, still holding her mother’s hand.   
“And you must be Evy.” The woman said. “My name’s Miranda Coates. I’m Izzie’s mother.”   
“Bobby Singer.” Bobby said, shaking her hand. “I’m Evy’s uncle.”   
“John Winchester.” John said. “I’m her father. This is Sam and Dean, her brothers. Why don’t you two come inside?”   
“We will, thanks.” Miranda said.   
“Daddy, can me and Izzie go play in my room?” Evy asked.  
“If it’s okay with her mom.” John said.   
“Evy, can I say something first?” Miranda asked. “Izzie told me what happened at school today. I wanted to thank you myself for sticking up for Izzie. Not a lot of kids your age would’ve done that.”   
Embarrassed at being put on the spot by someone she barely knew, Evy blushed. “Thank you.”   
“Mommy, can me and Evy go play now?”   
“Sure, baby. Just be careful, okay?” Miranda said.   
“I will, mommy.”   
The two girls headed upstairs, and John ushered Miranda into the living room. “Can we get you something to drink?”   
“A beer would be amazing.” Miranda said.   
“Coming up.” Bobby said, heading to the kitchen.   
“I also wanted to tell you I’m sorry. I feel terrible that Evy got suspended for this.”   
“Don’t. It’s not your fault.” John said. “I’m pretty proud of her for it, actually.”   
“Thanks.” Miranda said to Bobby, who had come back in with the beer Miranda had requested. “She seems like an amazing kid, from what Izzie’s told me.”   
“She is.” John said.   
“It’s hard sometimes. Sending Izzie off to school knowing she doesn’t have any friends. It feels good knowing Evy’s there for her.” Miranda told them, then laughed. “Sorry, I don’t mean to unload on you when we just met.”   
“It’s okay.” John said. “I hate to ask, but Evy said that Izzie told her she had a heart condition…?”   
Miranda nodded. “Yeah. She was born with a hole in her heart. The doctors hoped they would be able to repair it, but they couldn’t. Her heart’s failing slowly, and she’ll need a transplant at some point.”   
“Is it just you and her?” Sam asked.   
“Yeah.” Miranda answered. “Her dad decided that Izzie being sick was too much for him to handle, so he took off the day after she was diagnosed.”   
“Son of a bitch!” Dean said. “Sorry.”   
“That’s a lot nicer phrase than I’ve ever used for him.” Miranda assured him.   
“Do you two want to stay for dinner?” Bobby asked.   
“I don’t want to intrude on you guys.”   
“If it was an intrusion, I wouldn’t have asked.” Bobby said gruffly. “Baitfish is home with us four guys all the time, I’m sure she’d love to have someone here she can talk to a little easier.”   
“Sure. I think it would be fun to have some other adults to talk to.”   
“Is there anything Izzie isn’t supposed to eat?” Sam asked. “With her heart, I don’t want to make her sick…”   
“What were you making?” Miranda asked.  
“Spaghetti.”   
“That’s fine.” Miranda said. “There are a few restrictions, but she mostly just has to be careful about eating too much at a time.”   
“I’ll start on dinner then.” Sam said.   
“Can I help?” Miranda asked.   
“No, you sit right in here and make yourself at home.” Bobby answered. “I have a feeling it’s been a while since you got some decent rest.”   
“On that you’d be right.” Miranda said. “Thanks, you guys. I have a feeling we’re gonna be good friends.”   
Just as she said that, a loud set of giggles came from upstairs.   
“I think you’re right.” John answered.


	20. Chapter 20

Evy sat up in bed, panting and crying. She’d had a bad dream about what had happened three days earlier, which had led to the bright pink cast on her arm. Her family thought she’d been climbing a tree in Bobby’s front yard. They’d taken her to the emergency room, sat with her as she got the cast on her arm, and taken good care of her since she got home. The problem, of course, was that she hadn’t fallen out of a tree. She had gone out to play with Dean’s permission, and gone to play in exactly the spot she wasn’t allowed to play in: the small shed in the backyard. She’d climbed to one of the top shelves, which were long and wide, and, she thought, big enough to hold her. Not wanting to get in trouble for playing where she wasn’t supposed to, Evy had told Dean she’d fallen out of a tree.   
She’d hoped the bad feeling in her tummy would go away, but it hadn’t. Every time someone came to check on her, or asked her how she was feeling, or wanted to give her a hug, Evy just felt worse. She knew she should tell them the truth, but one thought kept occurring in the back of her mind. The punishment for lying was a spanking. A spanking from Daddy was a scary enough thought, but she’d lied to everyone, not just him. Would Dean, Sam, and uncle Bobby spank her too? Every time she thought about telling them the truth, that thought scared her out of it.   
Evy got out of bed and went to her desk, grabbing Barney as she did. She felt terrible. Evy knew she was out of school today for a long weekend, so she didn’t get dressed. On her desk she saw a picture of her mommy. She started to wonder how her mommy would feel about her lying, and the bad feeling got worse.   
“Hey, little one.”   
Evy jumped. She hadn’t heard anyone else get up or come to her door. “Hi, daddy.”   
“You okay? What are you doing up so early?” John asked.   
“I couldn’t sleep.” Evy said.   
“Why not?”   
“Had a bad dream.” Evy answered.   
“You want to talk about it?” John asked. Evy shook her head, and John decided not to push it. “Are you hungry?”   
“No, sir.”   
John came in and sat on Evy’s bed, worried about how quiet she was. She wasn’t really a   
morning person, but for her to turn down food usually meant she was sick. She didn’t seem to be feeling sick, so he decided that something about the dream must be bothering her.   
“Little one, please talk to me. What’s bothering you?”   
“I’m okay, Daddy.” Evy said, smiling and trying to make him change the subject. “Can I sit with you in the kitchen while you make your breakfast?”   
John decided to tell her what they had decided to do that day. “Well, I’ve got a surprise for you.”   
“You do?” Evy asked. “What is it?”   
“Well, me and Sammy were about how brave you were at the hospital.” John said, making Evy squirm uncomfortably. “So all of us decided last night we were going to go camping with you this weekend.”   
Now Evy really felt bad. She’d been begging for weeks for them to go camping. Maybe she could stall them and convince them not to go. “But I can’t do anything with this arm.”   
“Sure you can. We’ll help.” John said. “Dean’s gonna take you fishing, and if you catch anything, we’ll make it for dinner over a campfire. What do you think?”   
“When do we leave?” Evy asked.   
“As soon as everyone gets ready.”   
Evy’s reaction was beyond bizarre in John’s eyes. She burst into tears, and buried her face in her hands on top of her desk. Everyone had given up their weekends to do something she wanted, and she was the last person to deserve it. Concerned, John picked her up and held her on the bed for a moment. He finally asked,   
“Little one, what is it?” John asked. “I’m sorry, I thought the camping trip would cheer you up. We don’t have to go…”   
“I don’t deserve it.” Evy said, still crying.   
“What do you mean you don’t deserve it?”   
Evy decided to be brave and just tell him the truth. “I didn’t fall out of a tree.”   
“What?” John asked, an edge of anger beginning to make its way into his voice.   
“I didn’t fall out of a tree.” Evy repeated, wiping her eyes. “I was playing in the shed and I climbed up on the top shelf.”   
“And you fell down?”   
“Yes, sir.” Evy said quietly.   
John closed his eyes tightly and took a deep breath. He said as evenly as he could, “So you lied, not only to Dean when he asked you how you got hurt, but me, Sam, and your uncle Bobby too.”   
“Yes, sir.” Evy said again. She was getting worried now; Daddy was scary when he was mad. “Are you mad at me?”   
“I’m disappointed.” John said. “Very disappointed. And I’m going now to talk to your brothers and Bobby about what your punishment should be. Why did you lie to me?”   
“I didn’t want you to be mad at me.” Evy said.   
John felt Evy shaking in his lap and immediately softened his tone. “Hey. Look at me.” Evy looked up and John almost cracked when he saw she was crying again. “I’m not happy with you right now. But no matter what, I still love you.”   
“I love you too, Daddy.” Evy said.  
“Okay. Stay in here on your bed until I call you.”   
“Yes, sir.” Evy said. John placed her on the bed and kissed her cheek. “I’ll be back.”   
Evy seemed to be waiting forever for daddy to call her back. She found herself wondering now why she hadn’t just told them the truth to begin with. Sure, she’d have been in big trouble, and probably would have gotten a spanking when they got home, but she could have avoided feeling bad for the last few days. She had no doubt that her family would have eventually forgiven her had she just come out and told them what really happened. But would they forgive her now? Before she could worry about it too much, John was back.   
“Come downstairs, little one.”   
Evy followed John down the steps and into the living room. On the couch sat Dean on one end, Sam next to him, an empty spot where Evy guessed John had been sitting, and Bobby was on the arm of the couch. All of them were frowning. John took his seat and pointed to the coffee table.   
“Sit down.”   
Evy took her seat and was grateful she had brought Barney down with her. She held him tight to her chest and fought hard not to cry.   
“Tell them what you told me.” John said.  
“I didn’t fall from a tree.” Evy said. “I was playing in the shed and I fell from the top shelf.”   
“Baitfish, I told you to stay out of that shed for just that reason.” Bobby said, much more sternly than Evy was used to hearing from him. He pointed at her cast and said, “You get a lot of freedom around the house to play when you want because I trust you to follow the rules. I’m gonna have to seriously think about changing that now.”   
“Yes, sir.” Evy whispered.   
“Cricket, I know when we tell you not to do something it can be hard sometimes not to do it. But you have to listen to us.” Sam said. “We don’t just make rules to be mean or so you can’t have some fun. Do you understand me?”   
“I understand.” Evy said.  
“Kiddo, I’m really hurt that you lied to me.” Dean said. “I was really worried about you when you got hurt. I wouldn’t have gotten mad at you, and I still would have taken care of you.”   
Evy nodded, finding it harder and harder to keep herself from crying.   
“Little one, do you have anything to say before we tell you your punishment?”   
“Just that I’m sorry. I know I got hurt because I didn’t listen to you, and I’m really sorry.” Evy said.  
“Alright.” John said. “Since you lied to all of us, all of us are punishing you. Understand?”   
“Yes, sir.” Evy squeaked, certain she was about to be sleeping on her stomach for weeks.   
Sam began. “Cricket, you didn’t hurt your writing hand, so you’re writing lines for me. Fifty of them. ‘I will always tell the truth’. Understand?”   
“Yes, Sammy.” Evy said. Fifty lines was more than she could imagine-the most he’d ever made her do was fifteen. But at least she didn’t have to take one spanking. “I’ll write ‘em, I promise.”   
Sam nodded, and Dean took his turn. “I know you were looking forward to going to the zoo with me next week. That’s over now. You’re gonna have to wait until I decide you’ve earned it again.”   
Evy’s heart hurt at that. She had been looking forward to seeing the animals at the local zoo, something other than the random squirrel and raccoon that was around the junkyard. She had to remind herself that he said she would have to earn the trip back again, meaning that it wasn’t gone for good. She’d just have to be extra good for everyone, especially Dean.   
“I’ll earn it back, Deanie. I’m sorry.”   
“Mine’s pretty simple.” Bobby said. “You’re not gonna have a lot of time to play this week. You’ll be doing a lot of chores for me.”   
Evy didn’t know how much she could do with her arm broken, but she vowed to do her best. “I’ll do ‘em, uncle Bobby. Promise.”   
Finally, it was John’s turn. “I think you know what to expect from me.”   
“Yes, sir.” Evy said, shaking again.   
“Let’s get this over with. Come here.”   
“Daddy, please not in front of everyone.” Evy said, tears already dripping down her face.   
“Evelyn, get over here. Now.” John said, sitting up straighter and almost growling at her.  
Evy reluctantly got up and walked over towards John, stopping first to give Sam Barney to hold. She made it to John, who took her hand first and explained again that he loved her and that what she did was dangerous and she couldn’t do it again. Evy was already crying and he hadn’t even touched her. John didn’t wait for her to answer him, just turned her around and swatted her. Exactly one time.   
“Okay, little one. It’s over.”   
A shocked Evy turned back around and asked, “That’s it?”   
“That’s it.” John said with a smile. “Sam convinced me that a broken arm is punishment enough. This time. But listen to me, and listen to me good. If you ever deliberately do something dangerous again, I’ll make sure you don’t sit comfortably for a long time. And if you lie about it, you’ll be in your room for a week, and get a bedtime spanking every night. Do I make myself clear?”   
Evy gulped. “Yes, sir. I’m sorry, Daddy.”   
John nodded. “I forgive you. Everybody else does too. You still have to do the punishments they gave you.”   
Evy nodded. “I will.”   
All four men in the room were thinking different versions of the same thing. They were thinking that they were glad Evy couldn’t read their minds. John had planned the whole time to only swat her once, and had let her sweat and squirm to add to the effect of it. Sam hadn’t wanted to punish her at all, but had agreed to give her the lines to help remind her not to do it again. Dean had told her she would have to earn her zoo trip back, but was already planning to just take her a month later. Bobby was planning to give her more chores than normal, but they’d be simple ones, even for a six-year-old. Evy grabbed John’s neck in another hug, relieved that the worst part of her week was over.   
“Why don’t you go get dressed, little one?” John asked.   
“I will, Daddy.” She turned to Bobby and asked, “Can I do Sammy’s lines before I do my chores?”   
“You sure can. On Monday.” Bobby answered.   
“Why Monday?” Evy asked.  
“Because we have a trip to take.”   
Evy gasped. “We’re still going camping?” John nodded, and an excited Evy nearly knocked the couch down with the force of her excitement when she launched herself first at Sam, then at Dean, then at Bobby, and finally back at her father. “You guys are the best!”   
“You’re pretty great too.” John said. “Go on, go get dressed.”   
“I love you, Daddy.”   
“I love you too, little one.” After Evy let him go and ran upstairs to get dressed, John turned to the other guys on the couch. “What?”   
“I don’t think I’ll ever get used to you being such a softie.” Dean said, barely containing his laughter.  
“Like you aren’t already planning her zoo trip again. Or you planning to read her extra bedtime stories next week.” John accused, then turned to Bobby. “Or you planning on giving her easy chores.”   
Bobby shrugged. “I guess we’ll see.”   
“Yeah, right. We’ll see.” John said. “Come on, let’s get ready. I’m looking forward to this myself.” The family went to their respective rooms to pack, and John thought to himself guess I have become a softie. Oh, well.


	21. Chapter 21

“No way, Izzie!”   
“Yes, way! My mom sounds just like an elephant when she snores!”   
Both girls collapsed into a fit of giggles. Miranda had heard them talking, and thought about pretending to scold Izzie, but she was laughing too hard herself to do it. She stood next to the bedroom door, plate of cookies in her hand, giggling into her hand before knocking on Izzie’s bedroom door. The girls scrambled as if they were hiding something, without realizing Miranda had been listening at the door for the last five minutes. They were both fighting giggles again, and Izzie said,   
“Hi, mommy.”   
“Hi. What are you girls doing?” Miranda asked.   
“Just talking.” Izzie said. “Are those for us?”   
“I guess so. Can I have a kiss from my baby elephant?”   
Izzie blushed. “You heard that?”   
Miranda laughed. “It’s okay, honey. You’re right. I know I snore.”   
“Thank you for the cookies, aunt Mimi.” Evy said, using the nickname she’d come up with for Miranda the first time she’d played at Izzie’s house.   
“You’re welcome, sweetie.” Miranda said. “Your dad called. You’re gonna stay with us for dinner, then he’s coming to get you.”   
“Okay. Thanks.” Evy said.   
“Mommy, did you get the tickets for the party?” Izzie asked.   
“I sure did. I go pick them up tomorrow.” Miranda said. “But let’s talk about that later. You two sit in here and have some fun.”   
As Miranda walked out, Evy asked, “What party?”   
Izzie answered, “There’s a mother daughter pajama party every year down at the community center. It’s really cool. You play games and talk and watch a movie and stay up real later and stuff. It’s really fun.”   
“Oh.” Evy said, suddenly getting quiet.   
But Izzie didn’t notice her friend getting upset. “It’s one of the only things I can really do without worrying about getting sick or hurt.”   
“Sounds cool.” Evy said, but this time she couldn’t hide the crack in her voice.   
“Evy? Are you okay?” Izzie asked. “Are you crying?”   
“No.” Evy said. “I’ll be right back. I gotta go to the bathroom.”   
“Okay.” Izzie said, watching as Evy left the room wiping her eyes.   
Izzie wondered what had happened. Evy had been fine the entire day, up until the point Izzie had asked about the party. Evy had said she wasn’t crying, but Izzie could tell she was just trying to hide it. Izzie knew that Evy’s mom had died when she was little, and suddenly Izzie felt terrible. She hadn’t thought that mentioning the party might make Evy upset. Izzie left the plate of cookies on her bed and walked down the hall to the bathroom. The door was shut, so Izzie knocked on the door cautiously.   
“Evy? Are you okay?” Izzie said through the door.   
“I’m fine. I’ll be out in a minute.” Evy said.   
Izzie sighed, wondering if she should go get her mother.   
The door opened, and Evy stepped out, wiping her red and puffy eyes again. “I’m okay. Let’s go eat those cookies.”   
“Are you sure?” Izzie asked. “I didn’t mean to make you feel bad when I asked my mommy about the party.”   
“I’m fine.” Evy repeated. “Let’s go.”   
Evy seemed okay for the rest of the afternoon, and by the time John came to pick her up, she seemed to have completely forgotten whatever made her upset earlier. But Izzie couldn’t forget. She thought about the sad look in Evy’s eyes when she’d come out of the bathroom. Izzie was sitting on the couch when her mother came out from the kitchen, drying her hands after doing the dishes. Miranda sat down next to Izzie and asked,  
“What’s going on with you? You feeling okay?”   
“Yeah.” Izzie said. “I want to ask you something but I’m not sure if you’ll be happy about it.”   
“Well, you can’t know until you ask.”   
“I was wondering if you’d be okay with me skipping the mother daughter party this year.” Izzie said.   
“You don’t want to go? We can stay home and watch movies or something…”   
“No. I was thinking about asking Evy if she wanted to go with you instead.” Izzie explained.   
“Why?”   
“Well, she got really sad when I asked you about it earlier. She asked me what we do at the party then she went to the bathroom. She said she wasn’t crying but I don’t believe her.” Izzie said.   
“I didn’t know Evy was upset.” Miranda said. “Why didn’t you come get me?”   
“I didn’t want to embarrass her in case she didn’t want anyone to know.” Izzie said.  
“That’s really sweet, honey.” Miranda said. “But you know, I bought the last two tickets today. If I take Evy, you’re not gonna be able to go. Are you okay with that?”   
“I’ll miss it, but I get you every day of the year. Evy really misses her mommy, she should be able to get one at least for one night.”   
Miranda was fighting back tears of pride. “Well, you’re right. I don’t like the idea.” When Izzie looked away, disappointed, Miranda took the opportunity to clear her eyes and said, “I love it.”   
Izzie’s head snapped back up in surprise. “Really?”   
“Yes. I’ve never been more proud of you than I am right now. And if you really want me to, I’ll go call Evy’s dad, and we’ll go over and ask her tonight.” Miranda said.   
“Okay. Thanks, mommy.”   
“And next year, I’ll get three tickets so we can all go. How’s that sound?” Miranda asked.   
“Sounds good.” Izzie said, waiting patiently on the couch as her mom called John.   
John eagerly agreed to letting Evy go to the party with Miranda, telling Miranda that Evy had been quiet and withdrawn ever since getting home. Half an hour later, Miranda, Izzie, John, and Evy were sitting in the living room. Izzie had told Evy that they had a surprise for her, so she was more cheerful than she’d been earlier. Miranda took note of the huge Christmas tree in the living room. Almost all the ornaments were handmade and looked like children’s crafts. Some of them were photos, and one in particular caught her attention. Though she’d never asked directly, she knew it was Evy’s mother. They shared the same color hair, the same color eyes, and the same smile. She held a baby Evy on her hip, and was looking at her like Evy was her entire world.   
“That’s my mommy.” Evy said suddenly, snapping Miranda out of her daydreaming.   
“What, honey?”   
“That picture you’re looking at. That’s my mommy.” Evy said. “I keep it in the center so she can be with us for Christmas.”   
“I can tell. She looks just like you.” Miranda said. “And she looks like she loved you a lot.”   
“Can I have my surprise now?” Evy asked.   
“Little one…” John reprimanded her gently.  
Miranda chuckled. “It’s okay, John. I’ll tell her. Sweetie, Izzie and I were wondering if you wanted to go to that mother daughter party with me.”   
Evy was stunned. “What?”   
“The party that Izzie asked me about. She told me you seemed a little upset when she asked me about the party earlier, so we were wondering if you wanted to go.” Miranda explained.   
“If you do, little one, it’s okay.” John assured her.   
Evy looked down and away from everyone. “No thanks.”   
“Evy…” Izzie started to say.  
“I said no thanks!” Evy said, jumping from the couch and running up the stairs to her room.   
John sighed. “Miranda, can you wait a minute? Let me go talk to her?”   
“Sure. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to upset her, I thought she’d be happy.” Miranda said regretfully.   
“I’m sorry too. I was just trying to make her feel better.” Izzie said.   
“It’s okay, you two. I have a feeling she thinks if she goes with you it’ll hurt her mom’s feelings. Just let me convince her that’s not true.” John said. “Don’t worry, it’s okay.”   
John walked up the stairs, prepared to give Evy a slight lecture about running off and it being rude, but he changed his mind the second he was a few feet from Evy’s door. He heard her crying, and when he was standing in the door of her room, he saw her lying down on her stomach, face buried in her pillow, clutching it like it was a lifejacket. John walked in and sat next to her on the bed. He had no sooner laid a hand on her shoulder than she was in his lap crying into his chest.   
“It’s not fair.” She sobbed.  
“What’s not fair?” John asked, cradling her and rocking her slightly.   
“I don’t want Izzie’s mommy, I want mine.” Evy said.   
“I know you do.” John said gently. “I want her too.”   
“Why’d she have to go? Why’d she have to leave me? Leave us?” Evy said. “I still miss her so much.”   
“If I could answer that question, your mother would be here right now. She’d be the one taking you to that party next week. She loved you so much that she thought her heart would explode.” John said, recalling a phrase that Missy had used with Evy as a baby.   
Evy was finally calming down and asked, “How did she die?”   
John swallowed, painful memories of Missy’s cancer surfacing in his mind. “She was sick. She was really, really sick. More sick than any doctors could do for her. She fought, as hard as she could, to stay here for you. All she wanted was for you to be happy. For you to have as good a life as you could possibly have.”   
“That’s why I don’t want to go.” Evy said. “’Cause it should be mommy going with me.”   
“Little one, listen. If you really don’t want to go, we won’t make you. But I think it’ll be good for you. And if your mommy were here, she’d be the one telling you to go.”   
“It wouldn’t hurt her feelings if I went with someone else?” Evy asked.   
“No. I promise it wouldn’t. No one can ever replace your mother. But she’d be glad you had friends that loved you when she couldn’t be here.”   
For the first time in a long time, Missy was there with them. As before, no one could see her, no one could feel her. But Missy had her arms around both of them, then reached up and stroked Evy’s hair. Missy was ecstatic in heaven with Ruthie, but when Evy’s heart hurt, Missy’s hurt. And she couldn’t let Evy hurt without offering her the comfort she’d always needed, even if Evy didn’t know she was there.   
“It’s okay, Kitten. Go. Have fun. Mommy loves you so very much.”   
“Daddy?” Evy said, sitting up, sniffing and wiping her face. “I think I want to go.”   
John smiled. “I think that’s a very good idea. Why don’t we go down and tell aunt Mimi?”   
“You think she’s upset I ran out?”   
“I think she understands.” John promised. “Come on, let’s go.”   
“Daddy?” Evy said. “Thank you.”   
“For what?”   
Evy smiled. “Being there when mommy couldn’t. Being my daddy.”   
John answered, tears of joy brimming in his eyes, “You don’t ever have to thank me for that, little one. You’re the biggest blessing I ever got. I love you.”   
“Love you too, Daddy.” Evy said. “Come on, let’s go tell ‘em.”


	22. Chapter 22

It was a hot, muggy day, much hotter than John remembered it being in South Dakota. The weather was one of the reasons that John had decided to live with Bobby after Missy had died. But this year, a heat wave was making the simplest outdoor chores, like cutting the grass, much harder than normal. Izzie and Evy had been outside with him for a while, helping him by picking up toys and big rocks that might be in the way of the lawn mower, but Izzie had gotten out of breath and John had ushered them inside. Izzie’s heart condition was slowly deteriorating. She had always been a spirited kid, but it was getting harder and harder each day for her to do anything. John decided to put the lawn mower away and finish the rest of the mowing later.  
He stepped inside to find Izzie and Evy in the living room. Izzie was lying down, and Evy was sitting next to her on the couch. The two of them were watching The Powerpuff Girls, their favorite cartoon. Izzie looked a little pale, but seemed to be breathing more normally. When John shut the door, Evy said,  
“Hi, Daddy!”   
“Hey. You guys okay?” he asked.   
“We’re okay.”   
“Izzie, are you feeling better?” John asked. “Do you want me to call your mom?”   
“I’m better.” Izzie said. “Just tired. Please don’t call mommy. She’ll make me stay in bed for the rest of my life.”   
John laughed. “A little dramatic, don’t you think?”   
“Please don’t call her.” Izzie said. “I just want to stay with Evy for a while.”   
“Okay, sweetie. I won’t.” John felt sorry for her, but he didn’t tell her that. She tried so hard to be a normal kid, but she was just too sick. “Do you want some water?”   
“Yes, please.” Izzie said. “I’m sorry we couldn’t help you more.”   
“It’s okay. I’m done for now anyway. Are you girls hungry?”   
“I am.” Evy said.   
“I guess you’d like me to make you some lunch then?”   
“Yes, please.” Evy said with a grin.   
“Alright. I’ll make you a sandwich. Ham or turkey?”   
“Peanut butter and jelly?” Evy asked.  
John laughed. “Anything for you, my love. Izzie, do you want a PB and J?”   
“Yes, please.”   
John went to clean himself up, then proceeded making lunch for the girls. Izzie slowly recovered her strength, and by the time Bobby and Dean returned an hour later, and Sam was back from work, she was almost back to her normal self. John decided to quietly tell Miranda about Izzie getting out of breath when she came to pick her up. Finally, around seven that night, there was an urgent knock at the door. John went to answer it, and found a shaken Miranda standing there.   
“Hi. You okay?”   
“Yeah. Is Izzie ready to go?” Miranda asked.   
“She’s up in Evy’s room. Why don’t you come in? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”   
Miranda nodded. “Yeah. I need to talk to you guys.”   
“What’s going on?” John asked. “Come on, sit down.”   
Miranda came inside and sat on the couch in the living room. “Is everyone here? Bobby? Sam? Dean? I want to talk to all of you.”   
John gathered everyone into the living room. “What’s going on?”   
Miranda sighed. “Izzie’s dad is in town.”   
“What? Where did he come from?” Dean asked. “I thought you said he was in jail.”   
“He was.” Miranda said. “Apparently he’s out.”   
“Are you okay? What did he say?”   
“Mommy?” All the adults jumped; Izzie had come down at the sound of her mom’s voice and no one had heard her. “Is Daddy back?”   
“Come here.” Miranda extended an arm and Izzie walked to her. Miranda pulled Izzie to her and said, “Yes. Your daddy is here. He came to see me today and said he wants to see you.”   
“Do I have to?” Izzie asked.   
John took note that Izzie seemed scared. He didn’t know too much about Miranda’s ex-husband, but what he did know made him sick to his stomach. Miranda had mentioned in the past that he had walked out on her and Izzie when Izzie’s heart condition was first diagnosed, and though she hadn’t said it, John guessed that he had at least been verbally, if not physically abusive to them. Izzie’s reaction to the mere mention of her father seemed to back that guess up.   
“I’m going to do everything in my power to stop that from happening. But he told me today that if I didn’t let him see you he would take me to court. If he does, I may not have a choice.”   
“I don’t want to see him, mommy.” Izzie said.  
“Baby, shhh. Listen to me. Haven’t I always protected you?”   
“Yes.” Izzie said, and a stray tear dripped down her face.   
“And I’m going to now. Even if I have to let you see him, he will not be allowed to see you without me. I won’t let that happen. If you see him, I swear to you I’ll be right there. Okay?”   
Izzie nodded. “Okay, mommy.”   
Miranda sighed. “Oh, baby. It’s gonna be okay.” She kissed Izzie’s cheek and said, “I was going to ask you guys this in private, but maybe it’ll make her feel better if I do it with her here. This house is the only place she spends time other than my house. He might show up here while I’m not here and try to pick her up. If he does, I just wanted to make it clear. I do not want her leaving with him.”   
“No chance.” Dean said.   
“No problem.” Bobby said.  
John agreed with Bobby and Dean, but he was more concerned with comforting the trembling Izzie. “Izzie, honey, listen to me. Do you trust us?”   
“Yes, sir.” Izzie said quietly.  
“We will keep you and your mom safe. Your dad is no match to me, Bobby, Sam, and Dean. Whatever the reason is you’re so scared, I promise we won’t let anything happen to you. Okay?”   
“Izzie?” Evy had come downstairs when Izzie hadn’t come back up. “Are you okay?”   
“Sweetheart, why don’t you go back upstairs with Evy for a few minutes, okay?” Miranda said. “I want to talk about some grownup stuff.”   
“Okay, mommy.” Izzie said, turning around to give her mother a hug before going back upstairs.   
“Izzie? What’s wrong?” Evy asked once they were back in her bedroom.   
“My daddy’s back.” Izzie said sadly.  
“I thought you didn’t have a daddy.” Evy said.  
“I do, but he wasn’t very nice to me and mommy.” Izzie said. “He yelled at us a lot and…”   
“And what?” Evy asked.   
Izzie had tried to hide it downstairs, but she was scared and started crying. “He used to hit us when he was mad. Mommy more than me, but he hit me too.”   
“Oh.” Evy said. “Don’t worry. My daddy and brothers and uncle Bobby will keep you safe.”   
“I know. But I’m still scared.”   
“Hey, sweetie.” Miranda had come to the door. “We’re gonna spend the night here, okay?”   
“Okay, mommy.” Izzie said, feeling slightly more at ease now.   
Miranda walked in and hugged Izzie again. “I promise you, everything will be okay. Whatever I’ve got to do, I will make sure of that. Alright?”   
“Okay, mommy.” Izzie said again. “I love you.”   
“I love you too, my little pumpkin.” Miranda said. “Come on, let’s get in our pajamas and the three of us’ll have a girls night.”   
Nothing more happened for three more weeks. Izzie came and went nearly every day, just like before. Miranda would drop her off to play when she went to work, and John would do the same the two times that he went to work and Bobby and Dean were off on a hunt. But nearly a month later, with John in the house and the two girls playing in Evy’s room, an alarmed Evy came running down the stairs.   
“Daddy! There’s somebody in the yard!”   
“What?” John asked.  
“Me and Izzie were looking out the window and Izzie saw somebody watching us from behind one of the cars. She said it was her daddy. She got real scared and she’s hiding in my closet right now crying.” Evy said.   
“Alright. Listen to me, and listen to me closely. Go back upstairs and get in the closet with Izzie. Neither of you come out until I come to get you. Understand?” John said.   
“I understand, daddy.”   
“Go.”   
Evy ran back up the stairs two at a time. John desperately wanted to go upstairs and comfort Izzie, but his old hunter instincts reactivated and he grabbed his gun out of Bobby’s desk drawer. A knock at the door caused him to grip the gun tightly in his hand, but he decided not to holster it. He was in his home, and if Izzie’s father tried anything, he was more than justified in firing. He answered the door to find a tall, skinny, scruffy man standing there. He looked to be about five years older than Miranda, and was standing with an ease that made John’s hair stand on edge.   
“What do you want?” John asked none too politely.  
“Hi, there. My name’s Kevin Coates.”   
“I know who you are. Care to tell me why you’re stalking around my yard and scaring the shit out of my daughter?” John asked.  
“I didn’t mean to scare her. I’m here to pick up my daughter.”   
“Izzie’s not going anywhere with you.” John said.   
“You can’t keep me from my kid.”   
“I can and I will.” John raised the gun a couple of inches. “In whatever way I have to.”   
“ISOBEL! GET DOWN HERE NOW! I KNOW YOU KNOW I’M HERE!”   
Before Kevin finished his shout, John had aimed the gun just above his shoulder and fired.   
“What the hell are you doing?” Kevin shouted again, this time not as loud due to the ringing in his ears.   
“I’ll tell you this once. Get the hell off this property and do not come back. If you’re not gone in ten seconds, I’m going to assume that you’re planning to break in and I will shoot you this time.”   
“You’re crazy!” Kevin shouted as he backed away. “You’ll regret this.”   
“Doubt it.” John said. “You better get moving. You’ve got about three seconds left.”   
Once John was satisfied Kevin had left, John headed back up the stairs. Evy’s closet door was shut, and John carefully opened it. He found Evy on the floor, arms around Izzie, who had her knees up to her chest and her hands over her ears, shaking and crying. Evy had her own tears, scared and confused at Evy’s reaction. John crouched down and gently grabbed Izzie’s elbow, sending her scrambling into the corner of the closet.  
“Izzie, Izzie, it’s me. Open your eyes, sweetheart, you’re safe.”   
Izzie’s eyes opened, and when she saw it was John and not Kevin, she collapsed into sobs.   
“Izzie, you’re safe, honey.” John repeated. “Take some deep breaths.” When she was down to shaky breaths, John asked, “Are you okay?”   
“Is he gone?” Izzie asked.  
“Yes, he’s gone. It’s just me and Evy here now.” John said gently. “Izzie, I want to ask you a question. It’s okay if you don’t want to answer, but I feel like I need to ask. Are you afraid of your father because he hurt you?”   
Izzie nodded. “Me and mommy both.”   
“How? How did he hurt you, honey?”   
“He hit us.” Izzie said, not able to say much more than that.  
“Okay. Listen to me. You are safe as long as I’m around. We will keep you and your mother safe.”   
“You promise?” Izzie asked, desperately looking for some comfort and assurance.   
“I promise.”   
Izzie stood up and crawled into John’s arms, who picked up the still weeping child and comforted her as best he could. John told a worried Miranda about the incident, and long after they’d left that night, there was another knock at the door. John cautiously answered the door, only to find local sheriff Jody Mills there.   
“Hey, Jody. Come on in.”   
“I’m afraid I’m here on official business, John.” Jody pulled a manila envelope out of her jacket. “I’m here to serve you.”   
John took the papers from Jody and quickly read them over. “Son of a bitch!”   
“What is it, Dad?” Sam asked, taking the papers from his father. “It’s a protective order.”   
“For who?” Bobby asked.   
“Izzie. Her father filed it. None of us are allowed to approach Izzie. Including Evy.”   
“What the hell?” Dean asked.   
“He’s claiming that it’s dangerous for Izzie to hang around with you guys, and until the custody case is settled, he wants you to stay away from her.”   
“Does that mean what I think it means?” John growled. “I have to tell my seven-year-old daughter she can’t see her best friend?”   
“What?” John cursed softly when he saw that Evy was standing in the middle of the staircase. She’d just gotten out of the shower, and was coming downstairs to spend a little time with them before going to bed. “I can’t see Izzie?”   
“Come here, Cricket.” Sam said. He picked up a distraught Evy and explained, “Not for now. Tomorrow, I’ll see what I can do about getting the judge to reverse it, but it probably won’t work.”   
“Did I do something wrong?” Evy asked.   
“No, little one. I’m afraid it was me. Remember when Izzie’s father came over earlier today? And I made him leave? That’s why Izzie can’t come over. I’m so sorry.”  
“But Daddy, you were just trying to protect her.” Evy said, starting to cry.   
John thought to himself Damn I’ve seen enough kid tears today to last a lifetime before he answered, “I know, little one. I know.”   
Evy started crying hard, and Sam held her on the couch until she fell asleep crying. John had a text from Miranda I’m so sorry about this. I’ll do what I can to change it. John simply answered It’s not your fault. Call me if you need me. Both girls were miserable for the next week. They both cried at the drop of a hat, wanting to be with each other and not really understanding why they couldn’t. It violated the protective order, but John and Miranda allowed the girls to talk on the phone. Finally, after a week, Miranda phoned John at work.   
“I can’t keep doing this.”   
“Me either.” John said. “Look, I’m willing to take the risk of getting in trouble for it. I’ll talk to John, Dean, Sam, and Bobby, but I’m sure they will be too. Why don’t you bring Izzie over tonight after dinner? We’ll let them see each other for a few minutes.”   
“Yeah, I’m willing to do it too. Call me if they say no, and tell them I totally understand if they do. But if not, I’ll see you at seven.”   
After dinner that night, Evy slumped upstairs to her room. Of course, everyone had agreed to the plan, and after Miranda and Izzie arrived, Sam walked upstairs to find Evy sitting on her bed, holding Barney and tracing a pattern on her bedspread.   
“Hey, Cricket. Will you come help me with something downstairs?”   
“Sure.” Evy said, placing Barney on the pillow behind her. When she reached the bottom of the stairs, Sam said, “Cricket, can you go get the remote off the middle couch cushion?”   
Evy raised her eyebrows in surprise at the unusual request, but when she looked, her face lit up in the first smile she’d had all week. “IZZIE!” Both girls ran to each other and embraced. “I thought we couldn’t see each other.”   
“Izzie can’t stay for long, little one.” John said. “Only about fifteen minutes or so.”   
“Thank you, Daddy.” Evy said, arms still around Izzie. “Hi, aunt Mimi. I missed you.”   
“I missed you too, sweetie.”   
John dreaded when Izzie had to leave, thinking that Evy would be upset and cry for her again, but she didn’t. She and Izzie kept their arms around each other almost the entire fifteen minutes, and when Izzie left, Evy gave her and Miranda another hug. As John tucked Evy into bed that night, he told her,  
“That might be the only time you get to see Izzie for a while, little one.”   
“It’s okay, Daddy. I’m glad I got to see her at all. Thank you. I know you could’ve gotten in trouble for that.” Evy said.   
“You’re welcome, little one. You’re welcome.” John checked the clock and saw it was well past Evy’s bedtime. “Time to go to sleep.”   
Evy nodded and grabbed John tightly around the neck. “You’re the best daddy in the whole world.”   
The happiness John felt that night as he went back downstairs with the rest of the family made him believe that maybe, just maybe, what he’d often promised to Evy really was true. Everything would be okay. They discussed Izzie’s visit, and ways to make Evy feel better not being able to see her. Around ten that night, John’s phone rang again, and it was Miranda’s number. Thinking it was Miranda calling to thank him for letting her bring Izzie, he answered the phone and put it on speaker.   
“Hey, you guys get home okay?”   
“Uncle John?” A high pitched, squeaky voice asked.  
“Izzie?” John asked, immediately jumping to attention. He turned the speaker off to avoid waking Evy. “Are you okay, sweetheart?”   
“I need your help.”   
“What’s wrong?” John asked, though he had a sinking feeling he knew. “Where’s your mother?”   
“Daddy’s here. They’re fighting downstairs. I’m really scared, can you come get me?”   
“We’re coming, sweetheart. Where are you now? Are you safe?” John asked urgently.   
“I’m in the bathroom. I’ve got the door locked.”   
“Good. Good, sweetie. Listen, I’m gonna hand the phone to Bobby, you stay on the phone with him. Keep the door locked and we’ll be there soon.” John said.   
“Okay. Please come uncle John, I’m really scared.” Izzie said again.   
“We’re coming, baby. We’re coming. Just keep that door locked and we’ll be there.” John shoved the phone into Bobby’s hands, who immediately started comforting the crying Izzie. “Dean, get your gun and your phone and get in the Impala. Call Jody on the way to Izzie’s house.”   
“Dad, what’s going on?” Sam asked.  
“Izzie said Kevin showed up and he and Miranda are fighting. I could hear shouting in the background.”   
“What do you want me to do?” Sam asked.  
“Just stay here with your sister. If she wakes up, tell her I had to go to the garage because the burglar alarm went off and Dean and Bobby went with me. Just keep her calm.” John said.   
“Okay, Dad. Call me.”   
The night dragged on and on for Sam. It was a ten minute drive to Miranda and Izzie’s house, so when an hour passed and no one had called, Sam grew worried. He called everyone’s phone multiple times, only for Dean to answer around midnight and tell him that they were at the police station and couldn’t talk. Sam checked on Evy a few times, but she was sleeping heavily. Sam finally fell asleep around two that morning, only to be woken by the front door opening two hours after that.   
The looks on the faces of Sam, Dean, and Bobby made a pit form in Sam’s stomach. He had seen all of them come home from hunts in shock, but this was something deeper. Dean looked even worse than the hunt where he’d accidentally killed a little boy. No one said a word as the three of them sat down. There was blood on all three of them, and Sam finally couldn’t stand the wait any longer.   
“What happened?”   
John swallowed. “Is your sister asleep?”   
“Yes. Is Izzie okay?” When John’s face contorted as if in physical pain, Sam got even more worried. “What? What is it?”   
“The phone cut out on the way to the house. I heard a door being broken down, Izzie screamed in my ear, then the phone went dead.” Bobby said. “We got there and we found Kevin dead on the floor from a gunshot.”   
“Miranda shot him?” Sam guessed.  
“No, Sam. He had shot her, then himself.” Bobby said.   
The breath left Sam’s chest. “What?” But the worst was yet to come. “What about Izzie? Did he hurt her?”   
“No. No, um, the police think Miranda fought him and got him off Izzie, then he got mad and shot her. Izzie didn’t have any wounds on her.”   
“So she’s okay?” Sam asked. “Right?”   
“Sam, she saw Kevin shoot Miranda. And probably saw him shoot himself. He scared her so bad that she had a heart attack.”   
“She’s seven!” Sam said in disbelief.  
“With a heart condition.” Bobby reminded him.   
“Oh, my God.” Sam said. “Are they both…”   
“No, they’re not dead.” Dean said. “They’re at Sioux Falls General. Miranda’s in surgery and Izzie’s on life support.”   
A soft knock at the door startled all of them. John, numb from what he’d just experienced, didn’t even bother to draw his gun as he might have before. At the door was Jody, with tears streaking down her face. She delivered the news in a simple, straightforward way.   
“They’re gone.”   
“Miranda?” John asked.  
Jody shook her head. “Both of them.”   
John had been haunted by a number of things in his life. His service in Vietnam, witnessing Mary’s death, his bumpy relationship with Evy the first time he’d raised her, Missy’s death, Evy’s death, her abduction by Gordon. He had mostly moved past all those things, and was able to feel at least a semblance of happiness taking care of Evy now. But Izzie had been conscious when they first arrived at the house. Barely conscious, but conscious. John believed that the last words Izzie spoke to him as he held her hand and told her she would be fine would haunt him forever.  
You said you’d keep us safe.


	23. Chapter 23

It had been four hours since getting home from Izzie’s, and no one had spoken except Sam. John, who didn’t drink nearly as much as he used to, hadn’t stopped. Dean followed suit. Sam tried to get them to stop, reminding them that Evy would be up soon and they’d have to tell her. The thought made John seriously consider leaving the house and not coming back. Sam gave up, and eventually convinced John to let him break the news to Evy. The dreaded moment finally came. Evy, still thrilled from her visit with Evy the night before, came down the stairs with a huge smile and in a better mood than she’d been in all week. John’s heart twisted painfully at the thought of destroying that happiness and breaking her heart, but he didn’t have a choice. Evy quietly climbed into John’s lap and wrapped her arms around his neck.

“How’d you sleep, little one?”

“Really good, Daddy.” Evy said. “Thank you for letting Izzie come over yesterday.”

Evy turned around and yawned. “What’s for breakfast?”   
“We need to talk about something first, Cricket.”

For the first time, Evy noticed that something was amiss, and she got scared. “What’s wrong?”

Sam had been thinking for hours about what to say and how to tell Evy about Izzie, and he’d thought he was ready. But he was wrong. “Cricket, Izzie and your aunt Mimi got hurt after they left last night.”   
“What?” Evy asked. “Are they okay?”

“No, Cricket. They’re not.”   
“What do you mean?” Evy asked. “They were okay when they left.”   
“I know. It happened after they left and went home.” Evy’s tears in her eyes made it harder for Sam to keep his composure.

“Was it her daddy?” Evy asked. “The same man that came over that day?”

“Yes.” Sam said simply.

“Are they in the hospital?” Evy asked. “Can we go see them?”

“No, Cricket. They’re not in the hospital.” Sam said. “They died last night.”

A stunned Evy didn’t say anything at first, but finally asked, “Both of them?”

Sam couldn’t do more than whisper, “Yes.”

“No.” Evy said, voice breaking and shaking her head. “No, they’re not gone.”   
“Little one…” John started to say, before Evy exploded in an emotional fury none of them had ever seen.

“NO!” Evy shouted, pushing him away and jumping off his lap. “No, they’re not gone. They’re okay.”   
“Little one, I’m sorry. I don’t want it to be, but it is.”

“No!” Evy said again, but this time there was much less force behind her denial. John tried to pull her to him with the intention of holding her, but Evy snapped. “No! You said you’d keep her safe!”

“What?”

“You said you’d keep her safe!” Evy cried. “All of you did!”

“Cricket…”   
“NO!” Evy screamed again. “Leave me alone! All of you!”

With that, Evy turned on her heels and ran up the stairs back to her room, leaving behind her stunned family.

“Guys, she didn’t mean that.” Sam said quickly, hoping to stop any of them from leaving.

“We know, Sam.” Bobby said.

“Yeah, we know.”

“No, Sam. She did mean it. And she was right.” John said bitterly.

“Dad…”

            A sudden crashing sound from Evy’s room brought all of them running full speed up the stairs. Evy was taking everything in her room that wasn’t nailed down and was throwing it to the floor as hard as she could. The scene was so out of the ordinary, so crazy to them, that for almost half a minute all four adults stood there letting her trash the room. Sam was the first to jump into action. He ran inside and forcefully grabbed Evy’s arms, but Evy still continued to fight him.

“Let me go!”

“No.” Sam said firmly, though not without compassion. “Not until you calm down.”

“Please let me go.” Evy tried again.

“No.” Sam said again. “No. Look at me.” When Evy finally stopped fighting, Sam loosened his grip on her arms but didn’t completely let her go. “I know it hurts. And I know it feels like this will help, but it won’t.”  
“How do you know?” Evy asked bitterly.

“Because I’ve been through it. I know it hurts, baby. But we’re all here for you.”  
“She’s gone.” Evy said, the shock of it beginning to wear off for Evy. “She’s never coming back.”

“No, Cricket. I’m sorry. She’s not.”

            Every ounce of resistance left Evy at that point, and she crumpled like paper into Sam’s arms. Sam held her on her bed for a while, until she fell asleep long after Bobby and John had gone back downstairs. Dean attempted to help, rubbing her back to try and calm her, but it made no difference. Eventually he followed Bobby and John downstairs, leaving Sam alone with the shaking, crying Evy. Sam put her back to bed, not sure what else to do. He had been kicking himself for not making her breakfast before telling her about Izzie, but the violent reaction she’d had to the news in her room would probably have done nothing more than make her sick. As Evy slept, Sam prepared to go downstairs and try to convince his father again that Eyv had just spoken in grief and hadn’t meant to accuse him, but a knock at the door stopped him.

“Hey, Jody. Come on in.”

“Hey, guys.” Jody said. “I came to tell you that the investigation’s been closed.”   
“Thanks.” John said half-heartedly.

“How’s Evy doing?” Jody asked. “Did you tell her yet?”   
“Yeah.” Sam said. “It, um, didn’t go well. I just put her back to bed.”

“Listen, I came to ask you guys about something.” Jody said. “Miranda didn’t have any other family. She was an only child, and her parents died when she was seventeen.”   
“We knew all that, Jody.” Bobby said.   
“Yeah, but that means there’s no one for me to call to come claim her or Izzie’s body.” Jody explained. “I checked her hospital records. She named you and John as her next of kin. It means if you two don’t claim their bodies, we have to bury them in the potter’s field outside of town. Next to the bastard that killed them.”

“That’s not happening.” Bobby declared. “No chance in hell.”

“Good.” Jody breathed. “You don’t have to come get them right away. Stay here with Evy today, and I can help you bury them tomorrow.”

“Thanks, Jody.” Sam said. “Jody? Are you okay? It can’t have been easy dealing with a crime scene like that.”

“I’ve been a cop for thirty-five years. Never once have I had a crime scene that made me cry.” Jody said. “But the look on that kid’s face…Sam, I don’t think I’ll ever stop seeing it.”   
“I know exactly how you feel.” John said from the corner, where he was in the process of mixing another drink.

“John, listen to me. You did everything you could for Izzie last night. What happened to them was Kevin’s fault. No one else’s.” Jody attempted.

“I promised to keep her safe from that bastard.” John said. “She left this house twelve hours ago thinking that as long as I was around, her and her mom were safe.”

“John, stop. I checked Kevin Coates’ arrest record. The five years that he and Miranda were married, she had him arrested six time for domestic violence, but she never pressed charges. Not until the last time.”   
“Why the last time?” John asked.

“I called the sheriff’s office where she came from. The last time, Izzie was four, and Kevin slapped her in the face so many times fractured her cheek.” Jody said. “Miranda had him arrested, and she refused to drop the charges. He plead guilty, and Miranda took Izzie and ran.”

“Son of a bitch!” Dean thought. “And I thought the monsters we fought were disgusting.”

“Apparently some humans can do a lot worse.” Jody remarked. “I’ve got to get back to work. I’ve had reporters calling the station all day. Have you guys had any call or show up?”

“No.”   
“I know you won’t be crazy about this, but let me get a deputy to park close by the garage…” Jody suggested.

“No. We can handle it.” Bobby said.

“Okay. But please, please, please, if you need me, call me.” Jody begged.

“We will. Thanks, Jody.”

“John? Do you remember when we loaded Izzie into the ambulance last night? She was saying something that none of us could really make out?” Jody asked.

“Yeah.”

“Right before she slipped into the coma in the ambulance, the paramedic figured it out. She was trying to say ‘Thank you, uncle John.’ And…” Jody seemed to think twice about telling them the entire story, but continued, “Goodbye.”

            Jody finally left, but her attempt at cheering up John had exactly the opposite effect. Dean left and went to the garage to explain to Morris, the garage’s general manager, what had happened the night before. Bobby forced John to eat some breakfast and stop drinking, reminding him that Evy would need him when she woke up. John didn’t believe him, but when Evy came back downstairs after lunch, she stood next the couch with a look of shame on her face.

“Daddy?”

John, who had been laying down, jumped up in surprise. “Hi, little one.”

“Can I sit with you?”   
“Sure.” John sat up and Evy climbed up next to him. “How you doing?”

“I’m sorry.”   
“What are you sorry for?” John asked as he stroked her hair.

“That I got so mad at you earlier. I know you tried your hardest to keep Izzie safe.” Evy said sadly.

“I did, little one. I’m so sorry I couldn’t save her.”

“It was just easier to be mad at you.” Evy said, her crying starting up again. This time she didn’t shake or sob, just leaned against his side and let him wipe her face as she talked. “’Cause you’re here and she’s not.”

“I understand.” John said sincerely. “I’ve been getting pretty mad at myself this morning.”

“What happens now?”

“Well, all of us are going to stay here today. Tomorrow we’re going to get Izzie and your aunt Mimi and we’re going to bury them.” John explained.

“Why do we have to do it?” Evy asked.

“They didn’t have any other family.” John said. “We’re it.”   
“I don’t want to bury them.”   
“Why not?” John asked.

“Then they’ll really be gone.”

John sighed. “I know it’ll be hard, little one. But they can’t really rest until we bury them.”   
“Do you think Izzie’s better? That she’s not sick anymore?”

“I think so.” John said. “I think she’s up in heaven right now, jumping around and playing.”

“Without me.” Evy muttered.

Unable to think of what else to say at the moment, John kissed her. “Come on. You need to eat something.”   
“I’m not hungry.”

“I’m not either, but I’m not gonna let you make yourself sick.” John said. “Come on.”   
            The rest of the day was the longest any of them had been through. Evy cried at various points throughout the day, triggered by things such as finding a photo of her and Izzie when she cleaned her room, Sam asking a total of seven times if she was okay, and the arrival of one of the reporters Jody had mentioned. After putting Evy to bed, John and Bobby argued about whether or not to salt and burn the bodies of Izzie and Miranda. They ultimately decided not to, since Evy knew nothing of the supernatural and she was dealing with too much for a seven-year-old to deal with anyway.  They decided to bury the two of them and keep watch for any signs of one or both of them coming back as ghosts. The following afternoon, after Izzie and Miranda had been buried, Evy was back in her room. She couldn’t see her, but Missy had her arms around her in a tight hug.

“I’m so sorry, Kitten. I wish I could take this pain away from you.”   
Missy stayed as Sam ventured up to the room and knocked on the door. “Cricket, can I come in?”

“Sure.”

“How are you feeling?” Sam asked as he sat next to her.

“I don’t want to say.” Evy said without looking up.  
“Why not?” Sam asked, puzzled by her unusual response.

“You’ll be mad at me.”

“If I promise I won’t be, will you please tell me?” Sam asked.

“I wish I’d stayed with mommy. I wish I’d never come back.”

Sam was hurt by her admission, but he wasn’t too surprised. He often wondered how much she remembered about the circumstances regarding her return to them. Apparently, she remembered everything about it. She had already been sensitive before Izzie died, and he could only imagine how much she was hurting at the moment.

“Sammy? Does it ever stop?”   
“What, baby?” Sam asked.

“Hurting. In here.” Evy said, pointing to her heart. “It still hurts as bad as it did yesterday.”

“I wish I could say it would, baby. But when you feel bad, you just have to think about Izzie. Do you think she would have wanted you to be miserable?” Sam asked.

“No. But I can’t help it.”   
“I know. But one day soon you’ll laugh, and for a minute or two it’ll stop hurting. Then after a while, you’ll stop thinking about her being gone all the time.” Sam explained.

“I don’t want to forget her!”

“You won’t. But I promise, the day’s gonna come when you’ll think about the good memories you had with Izzie, instead of just being sad that she’s gone.” Sam said. “Does that make sense?”

“I guess.” Evy said.

“And until you do feel happy again, you’ve got me and Daddy and Deanie and uncle Bobby all right here. If you feel sad, or lonely, or mad, or anything, you come find one of us, and we’ll hold you as long as you want. Okay?”

Evy nodded. “Okay.”   
“Is that what you want right now?”

“Yes.” Evy said simply.

“Come here.” Sam turned so he was lying down on her bed, and Eyv laid in front of him. Sam wrapped his arms around her, holding her close to him and stroking her hair to try and calm her. “I’ve got you, Cricket. We’ve got you.”

There was someone else there in the room with them. Missy, who was preparing to leave now that Sam was holding and comforting Evy, nodded and urged her over. Izzie stood in front of her best friend, a little sad herself that Evy was so upset and couldn’t see her.

“It’s alright, honey.” Missy assured her. “You can say goodbye.”

“Will she hear me?”   
“No. But she’ll feel it. Just take her hand and talk to her. Then just close your eyes, and you’ll be right back with your mommy. Okay?” Missy said.

“Okay. Thank you.”

“Thank _you_.” Missy said. “Thank you for being her friend.”

When Missy was gone, Izzie reached out and took Evy’s hand. “I’m sorry you’re so sad, Evy. I’m gonna miss you. But me and mommy are okay now. Mommy’s not so scared that Daddy’s gonna come back anymore. She doesn’t like she used to, and she laughs a whole lot more. I don’t feel sick anymore. In me and mommy’s heaven, there’s this big open yard where I can play whenever I want. I can get in the grass, and the dirt, swim in the water, all the stuff I couldn’t do here. I love you, Evy. I always wanted a sister, and I got one with you.” Izzie saw that Evy was about to fall asleep again, so she finally said it. “Take care of her, Sammy. Goodbye, all of you."


	24. Chapter 24

Evy was excited. She finally had something to look forward to at school. It had been a hard year for her so far. She loved school, but without Izzie there, she was finding it hard to concentrate sometimes. She’d cried in class twice the first week of school. Sam had suggested moving her to a different school, but instead she was moved to a different classroom away from the classmates she’d had with Izzie the year before. That seemed to help, so Sam dropped the matter. Today, though, Evy walked in to the house, took the permission slip out of her backpack, and immediately started on her homework. She was just finishing it up when John got home from the garage, and made his way up to her room.

“Hi, little one!”

Evy put her homework into her homework folder and set it aside for Sam to look at. She turned and smiled at her father. “Hi, Daddy!”

“You’re in a good mood.” John said with a smile. When Evy got up and hugged his waist, John chuckled. “A really good mood. How was school?”

“It was good. I need to talk to you about something.”

“Okay. What’s going on?” John asked, taking a seat on her bed as Evy went back to her desk and handed the permission slip to John.

            Evy waited patiently as John read through the permission slip, but got a little worried when he didn’t say anything. It was a permission slip for her to play soccer on a team at school. Her PE teacher had noticed how well she played in class, and asked her if she was interested in playing on the school team. John handed Evy the permission slip back without signing it.

“No, little one. I’m sorry, you can’t play.”

Evy was sure she hadn’t heard him right. “What?”   
“I said no. You can’t play. Tell your teacher when you go back to school.”   
“But Daddy….” Evy protested.

“I said no!” John snapped, surprising himself when he resisted shouting. He attempted to change the subject. “You want to help me make dinner?”

Evy put the permission slip back on her desk. “No. I want to know why I can’t play.”

Remembering his promise years earlier to be patient with Evy, John closed his eyes and took a deep breath. “Because I said so. Now drop the attitude and either come downstairs with me or sit up here and sulk.”

            Evy chose the sulking option, and sat on her bed with her arms crossed over her chest. She just didn’t get it. Daddy had been the one, all year, encouraging her to make more friends and find some activity that would keep her busy and not thinking about losing Izzie all the time. Now that she had done exactly what he said, suddenly he didn’t want her to do it? Another thought occurred to Evy, one that made her angry and hurt. Daddy knew that she got picked on because she was the smallest kid in her entire class. Was that why he didn’t want to tell her why she couldn’t play? Because he thought she was too little and couldn’t do it? Or maybe he didn’t think she could play because she was a girl? Either answer was enough to make Evy mad.

“What’s with the poopface?”   
Evy looked at her doorframe to see Dean there. “Hey, Deanie.”

“You okay, kiddo?” Dean asked.

“No.” Evy said. “Daddy won’t let me play soccer at school.”   
“Why not?” Dean asked.

“I don’t know. He just said ‘because I said so’.”

“Oh. Sorry, kiddo.” Dean said sympathetically.

“Will you talk to him?” Evy asked hopefully.

“I can try, kiddo. But Dad’s pretty stubborn.”

“Deanie, I want to play.” Evy said.  “Please try.”   
“I’ll try.” Dean said.

            He headed downstairs, not at all confident in his ability to change the mind of John Winchester. Kill a vampire? Fight a ghost? Kill a werewolf? All that was a breeze. But change his father’s mind? _Here we go_ , thought Dean.

“Hey, Dad.”

“Hi, Dean.” John said. “You mind helping me with dinner?”   
“Sure.” Dean answered. “Umm, I’ve kind of been sent on an errand.”

“What do you…?” When John looked at Dean, he knew right away what it was Dean had been sent to do. “No, Dean. I’m not changing my mind. She can’t play soccer.”   
“Why the hell not?”

John rolled his eyes. Bobby had come inside. “Because I said so.”   
“That’s not a reason.” Bobby said. “Playing soccer would be good for her.”

“Bobby, please…”

“Hey, guys. Did I miss something?”

 _Great_ , John thought. “No, Sam, you didn’t.”   
“Your damn stubborn daddy decided your sister can’t play soccer and won’t tell anyone why.” Bobby said.

“What?” Sam asked. “Dad, if she wants to play a sport, that’s a good thing, right?”

“What is this?” John asked, annoyed. “Gang up on John day?”   
“When you’re being a stubborn asshole for no reason, yes.” Bobby said without flinching.

“Daddy?”   
“What, little one?” John asked.   
Evy had come down after deciding to play nice and see if she could convince John to change his mind. “I’m sorry I got mad at you upstairs. I just want to play soccer so I can try and make some friends again. Please?”

 _Damn, she’s good,_ John thought. “I said no, little one. I’m sorry, you’re not playing soccer. If you want to bring someone over to the house, you can. But I don’t want you playing sports right now.”   
Evy huffed and crossed her arms. “Why won’t you let me play? Is it because I’m a girl?”   
“No!” John said, the argument ridiculous to him.

“If I was a boy, you’d let me play.”

            At this point, Dean, Bobby, and Sam were watching the argument from the doorway. Bobby had a smirk on his face. _She’s just as stubborn as you, jackass._ Dean was admiring her bravery in challenging John’s ‘I told you so’, and couldn’t help but think _kiddo, if you had tried this thirty years ago…_ Sam was on edge, ready to intervene if one or both of them went too far in the argument. But he was proud of Evy for standing up for herself.

“That’s not true.” John said, his patience wearing thin. “I didn’t let Sammy play when he was your age either.”   
Sam bit his tongue to keep from saying _yes, you did,_ not wanting to inflame the argument any further, but Evy beat him to the punch. “Yes, you did. Sammy showed me pictures.” John sent a glare to Sam before Evy asked again, “So why can’t I play?”

What came out of John’s mouth made him wish he could slap his own face. He didn’t mean it, he just wanted to stop the argument. He knew it would hurt Evy, but the filter between his brain and his mouth shut itself off in the heat of the moment. He would wonder later that night what Missy would have said if she’d heard it.

“Because you’re not big enough!”

Evy said nothing, but every ounce of argument drained out of her. John knew what he’d done before the words left his mouth. Evy was bullied at school for her small size. She could hold her own against the bullies, but the comments bothered her. The only thing that made her feel better when she was bullied was her family assuring her she could do anything the bigger kids could do. Evy looked down and said quietly,

“I won’t play.”

“Little one…” John said, walking to her to try and apologize.

“Guess I really am, huh?” Evy said, looking up and eyes burning with anger and hurt. “You just proved the bullies right.”

            Evy turned and ran back up to her bedroom, and John was left with an angry Sam, Bobby, and Dean. Sam said nothing, just followed Evy upstairs. Bobby was significantly less reluctant to say something.

“You idjit! Why don’t you just lock her in her room?”

“Bobby, I don’t want her playing.” John said again.

“So you stoop to the same level as an eight-year-old bully and use the one thing against her that bothers her?”

“I know I shouldn’t have said it.” John said.

“So why did you? No more bull, why don’t you want her to play?”

John sighed. “Because I’m scared of her getting hurt.”

“What?” Bobby asked. “That’s idiotic! She’s a kid, getting hurt is like her job!”

“Sam and Dean got hurt enough because of my hunting.” John said.   
“Dad, what are you talking about?” Dean asked. “When did I get hurt?”   
“Dean, are you serious? I can’t even count the number of concussions, cut, scrapes, and all the other times you got injured hunting. I almost destroyed my relationship with Sam _and_ he lost Jess. You boys have been hurt enough. I want to do what I can to keep your sister safe.” When both Bobby and Dean were still appearing to be confused, John asked, “What happens if she gets hit in the face with a soccer ball?”   
“She gets a black eye or a broken nose! So what? We take care of her and she goes back out onto the soccer field.” Bobby said. “Look, I know you want to keep her safe, but you can’t keep her in a bubble. Because Baitfish is just stubborn enough she’d break it.”

            John gave up. He knew he was wrong. He knew he’d hurt Evy just to win the argument, and it made him feel just like Bobby had said-lower than a second grade bully. He left the kitchen and walked upstairs, where he could hear Sam trying to comfort a sniffling Evy.

“Cricket, you are not a baby….”

“Daddy still thinks so…”

“He didn’t mean it…”   
            John watched the two of them from the door. Evy sat on her bed with her legs crossed, Barney sitting in her lap and one arm wrapped him. She used the other to wipe her eyes. Sam sat beside her, expertly rubbing her back and speaking softly. John wished he could take a big dose of the seemingly boundless understanding and patience Sam had towards his little sister and keep it for himself. John cleared his throat and Evy and Sam turned to him.

“Can I talk to you?”

“Sure.” Evy said quietly.

“Sam, can you give us a minute, please?”

Sam looked towards Evy, who nodded and said, “It’s okay.”   
Sam was reluctant to leave them, afraid that John would say something else to hurt Evy, but he kissed Evy’s cheek and stood up. “I love you.”

“Love you too.”   
As Sam was leaving, John said, “Sam was right, you know. I didn’t mean it.”

“That’s what all the bullies say when my teacher makes them apologize. They don’t mean it either.” Evy said. She wiped her eyes with the back of her hand. “But it still hurts.”

“Little one, I’m sorry. I’m so, so, so sorry. I do mean it.”

“I’m sorry I argued with you.” Evy said. “I won’t play if you really don’t want me to.” John started to reply, but Evy wasn’t done. “It’s just…”   
“Just what?” John asked.

Evy reached under her pillow, pulled out a notebook, and handed it to John. On the first page were two taped photos. The one at the top was Evy with Missy. She was around two, and Missy was sitting in a pile of leaves that she had jumped into, her arms around little Evy’s waist, while Evy looked just off into the distance where Dean was making faces at her. Missy was pushing her hair back and laughing heartily. John remembered the day well, and to stop his brain from losing itself in memories, he moved to the second photo. It was more recent, one that Miranda had taken of Evy and Izzie less than a month before they’d died. Evy had an arm around Izzie’s neck, and both of them were looking dead at the camera with a prize winning grin on their faces. John’s memories were jarred again; Izzie was missing a bottom tooth. It had fallen out while she’d been playing at their house a few days earlier. But there was another part to the notebook that caught John’s attention. There were notes, written in pink and purple ink. The notes nearly filled the entire notebook, and ranged from one lined ‘I love you’ and ‘I miss you’ notes, to a couple of one page long letters, describing how much she loved and wanted each of them back.

“The pink is for mommy and the purple is for Izzie.” Evy explained.

“When did you start doing this?” John asked.

“Sammy gave me the idea. Right after we buried Izzie…”

When John looked up from the notebook, he noticed Evy’s bottom lip was shaking. “Oh, little one…”   
“I miss them.” Evy said.

“I know.” John said. “I know, I do too.” He closed the notebook and put it back under Evy’s pillow. “What does this have to do with soccer?”

“All I do is go to school and come home. I try to make friends to bring home like you said but all I can think about when I do is how they’re not Izzie. When my teacher said I was really good playing soccer...”   
“You thought it would give you a good distraction?” John guessed.

Evy nodded. “Yes, sir.”   
John sighed. “I think you’re right.”

“What?” Evy asked, stunned.

“I think you’re right.” John said. “I said no because I was so worried about you getting hurt playing sports. But I think you’re hurting already, aren’t you?”

“Yes, sir.” Evy said. “Does that mean what I think it means?”

John smiled. “Where’s your permission slip?”

Evy squealed in delight and jumped up, grabbing John’s neck and holding on tightly. “Thank you, Daddy!”

“You’re welcome, little one.” John said. “And I’m really sorry I picked on you downstairs. I think you’re one of the strongest and bravest people I’ve ever met.”

Evy pulled away from him and asked, “Really?”

“Yes. I do. You came back down here from heaven, you stood up to Gordon when he took you, you saved Dean’s life when that car fell on him, you stood up to me when I tried to punish you for that fight the day you and Izzie first became friends.”  
“I never thought about all that.” Evy said with a sniff.

“I do. All the time. I’m proud of you, my little angel. I’m always proud of you.”   
Evy smiled. “I love you, Daddy.”   
“I love you too. Now, get me that permission slip. After dinner, you’ve got soccer practice.”

“Will you help me practice?” Evy asked.

John bit back a groan; his seventieth birthday was approaching quickly, and the thought of running around in the front yard after an energetic Evy was less than appealing. “How about Sammy practices with you and I’ll cheer from the sidelines?”   
“Deal!”

 


	25. Chapter 25

“Little one, come here, please.”

Evy walked over to John, who had just gotten back from the garage after another long day and night of working there. Evy couldn’t help but notice the stress that constantly working was taking on her aging father. There were bags under his eyes, and he appeared to want nothing more than to climb in bed and sleep. Evy was still in her soccer uniform. The game had run long, and she’d decided to make herself dinner before changing into her pajamas. She was surprised to see John home. The old manager of the garage, Morris, had quit at the beginning of the soccer season, and was making it hard for John to be able to be home with Evy. More days than not, John would be gone when she got up for school and wouldn’t be home when she went to bed. Sam was also working more, with his law practice taking off. Dean and Bobby were gone on trips more often than usual. It left Evy alone most days. She didn’t really mind. She was eleven years old, in the sixth grade, and apparently her family leaving her alone most of the time meant they trusted her to take care of herself when they needed her to.

But, she thought to herself sometimes, it would be nice if it wasn’t _all the time._

“Hi, Daddy. What are you doing home?”

“I came to see you. I missed you.” John said, extending an arm in invitation of a hug, which Evy eagerly took. Chuckling, he said, “I thought you were too old for hugs now.”   
“Just at school.” Evy clarified.

“Oh. I see.” John answered.   
“Daddy? Is something wrong?” Evy asked.

“No. Why do you ask?”

“It’s just, you don’t usually come home in the middle of the afternoon.” Evy said.

John sighed. “I closed the garage for the day. No one was waiting, and I wanted to see you.”   
“Oh.” Evy smiled. “Good.”

“Yeah. It is.” John said. “I wanted to tell you something too.”

“What?”   
“I know it’s bothered you that we haven’t made it to any of your games this year. Me especially. I’m sorry we can’t be there.” John said.

“It’s okay, Daddy. I understand.”

“And that’s another thing I wanted to say. I really appreciate you being so understanding about it.” John said. “All of us do.”

“I do miss you guys a lot.” Evy admitted.

“I know. I’m trying to hire someone at the garage, and Sam just hired a junior lawyer to help him at his office. He has to train the kid, but he should be home more often pretty soon.”

“Daddy? I know you’re trying to be here more, but I’ve only got two games left. Do you think you’ll be able to be there for one of them?” Evy asked hopefully.

“I promise you, I will do my best.” John said.

“Coach Adams taped the game today. I have it in my bag. Do you want to see it?”

“I would love to see it. After you get a shower and PJs on.”

“Yes, sir.” Evy said with a smile. “I love you Daddy.”

“Love you too, little one. Go.”

            Two weeks later, in the last game of the season, Evy was on the field and time seemed to slow to a crawl. She could hear the crowd cheering, but they seemed to be miles away. All that mattered was the ball in front of her. No more than two seconds passed, but it felt like hours as she raised her leg, kicked, and…

“SCORE! Evy Winchester scores the win for Jackson Middle School!”

            Evy could hardly believe it. The season was over, and she’d just scored the winning goal for the team. Her team rushed her, lifting her up in celebration, but as Evy looked to the stands, there was one group cheering for her in the stands that stood out. Evy gasped, broke away from the team, and ran to her family, who was now standing on the edge of the field.

“You made it!”

“Yes, we did. We’re so proud of you.” John said.

“That was a great game, Cricket.”   
“Great game? Sammy, are you kidding? That was the best game ever!” Dean practically shouted.

Evy giggled. “Thanks, Deanie.”   
“Good going, Baitfish.” Bobby said, ruffling her hair.

“Hey Evy! Wait up!” One of her teammates, a girl that looked to be slightly older than Evy, ran over to her. “Coach is taking us out for ice cream. Do you want to go?”

Evy looked to John, who nodded in agreement. “It’s okay if you want to.”

“No.” Evy said, turning back to her teammate. “No, tell coach I’m going home.”

Her teammate shrugged, and ran back to the group.

“Little one, are you sure?” John asked. “You can go with your team if you want to.”   
“Can we go instead? I’d rather celebrate with you guys.”

John smiled. “You bet. Come on, let’s go.”

            The family left and went to the Impala, where Bobby parted ways with the family to go back towards his truck. He agreed to stop and pick up the ice cream, and Dean kept up a steady play by play recreation of the game. Sam congratulated her and praised her on how well she worked with her team. As they travelled back to the house, Evy took a deep breath, grateful she had such an awesome team at home.

**A/N: Cheesy ending, I know. Couldn’t be helped :).**


	26. Chapter 26

Evy walked down the driveway leading to Bobby’s house, wiping tears away as she went. She tried to get the voices from school out of her head, but it was impossible. She’d always dealt with bullies because of her small size, but this felt…different. More personal. The attacks this time were about her as a person. And there was no one she could turn to for help.

            Evy was surprised to see John home from the garage. Surprised but grateful. She could use, for the first time in a long while, one of his ‘daddy bear hugs’. Evy finished wiping her face and got herself in control of her emotions, quickly coming up with a story to tell him if he asked why she was crying. Evy stepped inside the house to find John waiting on her in the living room.

“Hi, Daddy.”

“Hey, little one. How was school?”

“Okay. Same old stuff. How was work?” Evy asked as she laid her backpack down on the coffee table.

“Interesting.” John said.

“Interesting how…?”

            When Evy turned around, her breath caught in her throat. John was holding his phone towards her, with a picture that she was now all too familiar with. The tears she’d worked hard to keep back were threatening to spill all over again.

“Where’d you get that?”

“It isn’t important where I got it. The important part is the story behind it.” John said. “Who’s the boy in the photo?”

Evy swallowed and stammered, which John took as a sign she was trying to come up with a story. “He’s just a friend.”   
“A friend? That you’re hugging and kissing the cheek of?” John asked. “Try again. Who’s the boy?”

“Daddy, please, put it away.”

John did as she asked, but didn’t let up with his questioning. “Who’s the boy?”

“I told you, he’s just a friend!” Evy said again.

“Then explain to me why this photo was shown to me by a regular customer at the garage, who told me that it’s going around school that you’re sleeping with this boy.” John said, his voice rising slowly in anger. “You are fourteen, you are way too young…”

“Daddy, it’s not true.” Evy said, her heart breaking at the accusation. _This is exactly the reason I didn’t tell any of you what was going on._ “Please, just listen to me…”

“If it’s not true, then what are you doing in a photo with this boy?”

Desperate for John to believe her, Evy was getting short of breath with panic. “Daddy, it’s not true.”

“Even if it’s not…”

            _Even if_? Evy thought. _He doesn’t believe you and he never will._ Not caring about the consequences, Evy physically pushed John out of her way, grabbed her backpack, and ran up the stairs. She threw her backpack on her desk then threw herself on her bed. She expected John to march up the stairs after her, yelling and snapping at her for running away from him. But he didn’t. Evy laid and sobbed into her pillow for what felt like forever, until her tears left her feeling drained. A knock at her bedroom door did little to rouse Evy from her miserable stupor.

“Cricket? Are you okay?”

Evy sniffed. “Did you come to yell at me too?”   
“No. I did come to talk.”

“I don’t want to talk.” Evy said.

“Cricket, we have to.”   
“I’m fourteen, Sammy. You don’t need to have the sex talk with me…”

“Clearly I do…”   
“I told you I don’t want to talk!” Evy said again.

“Too bad.” Sam said. “You can have this conversation with me or you can have it with dad. This isn’t just something we can ignore.”   
Evy sat up and angrily asked, “What can’t we ignore?”

“You know what.”   
“Say it.” Evy said between clenched teeth. “Say it, Sammy.”

“You’re way too young to be sleeping with…”

“Get out.” Evy said quietly.

“What?” Sam asked.

“Get. Out. Of. My. Room.” Evy said.

“Cricket…” Sam said again, surprised at the amount of angry venom in her voice.

“I mean it, Sammy. Get out now.”   
“Cricket, we need to talk about this…” Sam tried again.

“GET OUT!” Evy screamed, picking up her old stuffed unicorn Barney and hurling it at him. “Get out, get out, get out!” She threw a pillow or a stuffed animal for every angry ‘get out’ she screamed.

            Sam was lost. Even when Evy was in trouble, she never before had gotten angry or kicked him out of the room. He trudged back downstairs, and decided to leave her alone for a while. Sam and John were surprised a few minutes later when their friend Ellen, who was staying in town for a few days, showed up at the door.

“Where’s Evy?”   
“Ellen, this isn’t a good time.” John said.

“I didn’t ask if it was a good time, did I?” Ellen said, pushing her way inside. “I asked where’s Evy?”

“She’s in her room…”

            Ellen, much like Evy earlier, didn’t wait for John to finish, just marched up the stairs towards Evy’s room and shut the door. They were in Evy’s room together over a half hour before Ellen came back downstairs. Evy followed behind her. She’d been crying much more than before, and Ellen gently led her to the end of the couch and sat her down.

“I’ll take care of it, okay?”   
Evy simply nodded and whispered, “Thank you.”

“Look at me. You are worth more than all those stupid kids at your school combined. Understand?”

Evy smiled. “Thank you.”

“Would someone please tell me what’s going on?” John asked impatiently.

Ellen turned and crossed her arms over her chest. “I ought to kick your ass straight to hell is what’s going on.”   
“Ellen, what are you talking about?”   
“When she came home, did you listen to what she said? Or did you just assume that the stupid rumor that got passed to you was the truth?” Ellen asked.

“I asked…”   
“No, you didn’t.” Evy said from the couch. “You asked me who ‘the boy’ was, but you didn’t ask me about the photo. You just assumed the story you got told was the truth.”

“Cricket, what did happen?” Sam asked.

“Now, you want to know? Now, you believe me?”

“Believe _what?_ ” John asked.

“Brian’s a new kid. He’s from out of state and he’s been homeschooled his whole life. He was having a hard time adjusting, and he was being bullied a lot, so I told him I’d help him. Walk with him to class and stuff like that. We became friends.”   
“Where does the photo come in?” Sam asked.

“We were in PE. They took us to the football field to play touch football. He was having a hard time with it. A lot of the kids were teasing him, so he left the field and went behind the bleachers. He was upset, so I gave him a hug to make him feel better.” Evy was crying again, and John suddenly felt a sick sense that he’d betrayed her in a way that he might not be able to come back from this time. “Some stupid kid in my class took that picture and spread it around the whole school with the story that we were sleeping  together.”   
“Oh, Cricket…”  
“Don’t act all sympathetic on me now!” Evy yelled. “You guys were ready to believe the story just because someone you sort of know told you it was true.”

“Little one, I’m…”   
“Don’t. Don’t tell me you’re sorry. This is exactly why I didn’t tell any of you what was going on. Because I was afraid you’d believe it.” Evy said.

“I…I…”

“The only thing that’s gotten me through the last few days is knowing I’d be home soon when I was being teased and picked on.” Evy said. “Now I don’t even have that.”

“Cricket, how bad is the bullying?” Sam asked.

“Bad.” Evy admitted. “Really bad.”   
“Has anyone hurt you? Other than picking on you and teasing you?”

“I got pushed in the hallway one day and I’ve been getting notes in my locker.” Evy said.

“You’re changing schools.” John declared with an air of finality.

“NO!” Evy said.

“You actually want to stay here?” John asked.

“John, stop.” Ellen said. “What she needs is not for you to fix this. You can’t fix it. She just needs you to listen to her and just be there for her.”   
“But…”   
“No buts.” Ellen said. “I know it’s hard for all of you to wrap your head around, but you don’t need to fix this or solve it for her. Evy’s a big girl, she can take care of herself when she needs to. What she needs from you four is a soft place to fall when she feels like she can’t.”

“You’re right, Ellen.” Sam said. “Cricket, I’m really sorry we didn’t listen to you.”

“Me too, little one.”

“I was just trying to be his friend.” Evy said.   
“And you did good.” Sam assured her.

“Then why doesn’t it feel like it?”

Sam got up and walked towards Evy cautiously. “Can I sit with you?”

“Yeah.”   
Sam sat and expected Evy to remain apart from him, but instead she reached over and wrapped her arms around his waist. Sam stroked her hair and said, “It doesn’t feel right because you’re going against what the rest of people your own age think. That takes courage, and I’m proud of you for that.”

“Me too.” John responded simply.

“Why didn’t either of you believe me?” Evy asked.

“Because we’re idiots.” John said. “Because we were so worried about you that we wouldn’t listen to reason. We’re sorry, little one.”

Evy nodded and held tighter to Sam, who continued to just hold her and stroke her hair softly. He took Ellen’s advice to heart, and was amazed when he saw that maybe John was too.

“You gonna be okay now, kid?”

“Yeah. Thank you.” Evy said without looking up.

“Ellen, why don’t you stay for dinner?” John suggested. “This whole afternoon could have turned into a disaster without you. It’s the least we could do.”

“I might just take you up on that.” Ellen said. “I’ll start on dinner. You two stay here with her.”

“We will. Thanks, Ellen.” Sam said. He turned back to Evy, who was close to falling asleep. “I love you, Cricket.”

“Daddy loves you too, little one.”   
“’ove you.” Evy said, drifting off into sleep.


	27. Chapter 27

Graduation Night 2039

“Can I please change out of this now?”

“One more picture, little one. Please?” John begged.

“On one condition.” Evy said, holding out her arm. “It’s got to be with you.”

            John smiled and handed the camera to Bobby, who ushered him over to Evy to take what felt like the millionth graduation picture of the night. John had made her take pictures all day-with Sam, with Dean, with Sam, with Dean, with Bobby, holding her diploma, holding her college acceptance letter next to her diploma. But as John walked over, put an arm around Evy’s shoulder, and Bobby took the picture, John felt a sudden lightheadedness that caused him to sway. He grabbed Evy’s shoulder for support, and immediately the party came to a screeching halt.

“Daddy? Are you okay?”

“Yeah. Just got lightheaded all of a sudden.”

“Dad, maybe you should sit down…” Sam said, concerned.   
            But as Sam said that, suddenly an overwhelming wave of nausea caused John to collapse to the floor. He felt Evy holding his head, begging him to stay awake. He heard Sam on the phone with 911, and Dean and Bobby arguing about whether or not to take him to the hospital themselves.

“Daddy. Daddy, come on, talk to me.”

John looked up into Evy’s face, and was suddenly swallowed whole with a feeling he wasn’t used to. Complete, utter peace. The nausea and lightheadedness faded away, and all he could see was Evy sitting above him. He smiled and squeezed her hand. He wanted to say ‘I love you’, but couldn’t find the strength. John closed his eyes and slipped off to sleep, surrounded by nothing but black.

“Come on, John, wake up.”

            John woke up, and at first was too dizzy to respond. His head ached a little, but he felt okay. He tried to push himself up, but was immediately alarmed to find that he was restrained to the bed. Instinctively, he fought the restraints, only to be held down by a pair of unfamiliar hands. It was a doctor.

“Okay, John, okay. Calm down. I promise to tell you what’s going on. I just need you to relax.”

“Who the hell are you?” John asked. “Where’s my family?”   
“Your family?”

“Yes, my family. My sons, my daughter, my friend Bobby. My family that came with me to the hospital. Where are they?” John asked again.

The doctor looked to the nurse inside the room. “We’ll tell you where they are, John. But first I need to ask. Do you recognize me?”

“No. Who are you?” John asked.   
“I’m Dr. Sanchez. John, I’ve been your doctor for the last twelve years.”

“WHAT?” John shouted, fighting the restraints all over again. “That’s impossible. Where’s my family?”

“John, you have to calm down. If you don’t I’ll have to sedate you again.”

“Where the hell is my family!?!” John shouted again.

Dr. Sanchez turned to the nurse and nodded. “Sedate him.”

            John barely felt the needle go in before he was out again. When he woke up, it was dark, and he was still lying in the same bed. He didn’t have the strength to fight this time, so he decided quickly to just play along with the doctor until he could figure out a plan to escape. Dr. Sanchez was standing at the foot of the bed, looking over John’s chart.

“What happened?”

“Hey, there. Welcome back.” Dr. Sanchez said with a smile.   
“What happened?” John asked again.

“You woke up and were fighting. You’ve been doing that a lot lately.”

“I still don’t know who you are.” John said.

Dr. Sanchez sighed. “I was afraid of that.” He grabbed a chair and sat it next to John’s bed, just out of arm’s reach. “Tell me what you do remember.”

“What do you mean?”   
“What’s the last thing you remember before I had you sedated?” Dr. Sanchez asked.

“I was in Bobby’s living room. I think I had a heart attack, but I don’t know for sure. My daughter was standing over me, begging me to wake up and talk to her.”

“How old was she?” Dr. Sanchez asked.

“Seventeen. She just graduated high school.” John said with a smile, still insanely proud of her. Then it occurred to him. “Wait, what do you mean was?”

Dr. Sanchez put John’s chart down and said, “John, listen to me. You’ve been a patient in this hospital for almost thirty years.”

“What? What the hell are you talking about?” John asked.

“John, I know it seems insane.”

“That’s one word for it.”

“Just listen to me.” Dr. Sanchez replied. “I know it seems crazy, but all you have to do is listen to me. Okay?”   
John reluctantly nodded.

“Okay. Do you know what year it is?”

“Yes. 2039.”

“That’s right.” Dr. Sanchez answered. “John, you have a condition known as retrospective amnesia. Your brain remembers everything up to a certain point in your life. But everything after that has been a creation of your own mind.”

“What does that mean?”

“When your daughter was three, in 1996, she was in a car accident. Do you remember that?” Dr. Sanchez asked.

“Yes. She and her mother were in that accident. Evelyn was hurt but she made it.”

Dr. Sanchez shook his head sadly. “No, John. She didn’t.”

John swallowed hard. “What?”   
“She didn’t make it through that accident. Evelyn, her mother, and your son Sam were all killed that morning.”

“That’s impossible. Sam isn’t dead.” Dr. Sanchez said.

“Yes, John. I’m sorry, but he is.”

“If Sam’s dead, then where’s Dean?” John asked.

“John, a few years after your wife, son, and daughter died, you adopted another little boy. Do you remember his name?”

John started to respond that he didn’t have another child, but suddenly his brain flooded with memories of a child that, at first, he didn’t recognize. The little boy was no older than two, but John was at least in his fifties. John was holding him, talking to him, playing with him in the front yard. He was happy, and the baby was happy. The baby’s name suddenly occurred to him.

“Braeden.”  
“That’s right. You named him Braeden Samuel Winchester. He was a little boy who lost both his parents in a car accident. Social services didn’t have a good place to take him, so they asked you to care for him for a few days until they found a placement. You grew attached to him, and ended up adopting him.” Dr. Sanchez explained.

“What happened to him?” John asked.

“Dean was outside, target practicing with his gun. Braeden wandered away from you and towards Dean. No one knew until it was too late. One of Dean’s bullets ricocheted and hit Braeden in the heart. He was killed instantly.”

“No.” John resisted, but somehow he knew that what the doctor was telling him was the truth. “No, Braeden wasn’t my son. Dean did kill him, but it was an accident…”

“That’s right, John. It was an accident. But the thing about your condition is this. You’ve integrated a number of things from your actual life here at the hospital into the life that your brain has conjured up. You didn’t remember that Braeden was your son, but he was a big part of your life.”

“What about Dean?” John asked. “Where’s Dean? I want to see him. He must be…” The look on the doctor’s face was enough to make John’s voice break. “What?”

“You blamed Dean for Braeden’s death. John, I can’t tell you this part. You have to remember it. What happened after you discovered Braeden’s body?”

“I don’t…”   
“Think.” Dr. Sanchez pushed.

John did think back, and suddenly the answer occurred to him. It was more dark, more terrible, more awful than anything else the doctor had told him. “No. No, it can’t be true.”

“Say it, John. What can’t be true?”

“I killed Dean.”

“That’s right. After you discovered what happened to Braeden, your mind, for lack of a better term, snapped. You strangled Dean and killed him. You were given a psychiatric evaluation and determined unfit to stand trial. That’s how you ended up here.” Dr. Sanchez explained.

“So I’ve been here since…”   
“2000.” Dr. Sanchez said. “Almost forty years. You’re our longest full-term resident.”

“What about Miranda? And Izzie? And Bobby?”

Dr. Sanchez smiled. “Miranda was a nurse here for a couple of years. She used to bring her little girl Isabella to see you. They were just about the only two people you were happy to see.”   
“What happened to them?”

“They were killed a few years ago when Miranda’s husband was too drunk to know he was too drunk to drive.” Dr. Sanchez said.

“Why didn’t I know this?” John asked. “Why hasn’t anyone told me before?”

“We have, John. We’ve told you a few times.” Dr. Sanchez said. “You see, you have brief moments of lucidity. Sometimes they last for just a few minutes, sometimes a few days. But every time, we recount this story to you, and you eventually slip back into your fantasy life.”   
“But it felt so real.” John said.   
“I’m sure it did.”

“So, if I lost my mind when I found Braeden’s body, why did I choose the accident that killed Evy?”   
“That’s one of the things we still don’t know about your condition, I’m afraid.” Dr. Sanchez said. “Maybe because before the accident was the last time you remember feeling somewhat content.”

“Everything before the car accident…”   
“It seems you remember all that correctly. But after that accident, your brain’s completely mixed up about what’s real and what’s not.” Dr. Sanchez said. “John, I have to go check on my other patients. I’m going to let you out of the restraints, okay?”

John nodded, though he was too numb with the information he’d been given to respond. Dr. Sanchez let loose the restraints and assured John he’d be back soon to talk. He quickly checked John’s vitals, then left the room. John’s brain was spinning. If his entire life for the past forty years was a lie, what else was a lie? He’d often felt like his life was too crazy to be real, and maybe it actually was. When John felt something grab his foot, he jumped. What he saw made him certain that he actually _was_ crazy.

“Little one?”

The little girl, hallucination, spirit, or whatever it was, didn’t speak, simply kept her hand on John’s foot. Evy smiled. She was no older than three, the same age Dr. Sanchez said she’d been when she died.

“Are you…are you dead?”

Evy nodded.

“Can you speak?”

Evy shook her head no, just beckoned John with her other hand.

“You want me to come with you?”

Evy turned and looked at something behind her, then started to walk away.

“Wait. Don’t go, please.”   
She turned back and beckoned to him again. _Come with me, Daddy. Me and mommy and Sammy and Deanie are waiting for you._

            John had no idea where the voice had come from, or even if it was real. Suddenly, he didn’t care. He didn’t know how he knew, but what he’d been told was real. Even if it wasn’t, John was an old man, who had, as Dr. Sanchez put it, been through more than he could stand.

“I’m coming, little one. Will you wait for me?”

Evy nodded and ran to him, wrapping her arms around his waist.   
“I’m coming.”

            John walked to the door of his room and locked it, surprised that there was a lock on the door in the first place. He turned and looked around. There was nothing he could really use to accomplish what he was planning, except his bedsheets. So he walked over, pulled all his sheets off the bed, and carefully tied them into a tight knot. Five minutes later, he was once again slipping off into the black night.


End file.
